When I pulled off my girlfriend’s underwear the other day she probably thought it had something to do with make-up sex, since I’d spent the whole evening with internet research instead of listening to her. She was absolutely right, but first I wanted to find out about her character. Martha Olschewski, the world’s foremost vagina reader, was gonna help me with that.
When you see girls all flighty and delicate like Tinkerbell you just want to split them in half with your cock. Sounds harsh but it’s been working pretty well for both sides since the year -47,994.
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You know that one weird dude in your class who always bitched about your town and talked about how he was going to move to New York one day? He did. They all did. In fact, that’s what New York is.
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