I’m all up for stoicism. Moaning little self-involved bitches make me feel ill. My granddad fought in a tank in a desert and saw his matey get eviscerated, then spent six months in a prisoner of war camp, and he wasn’t a little moaning bitch about it. Still though, once being stoic turns into a t-shirt that says, “My husband went to death via cancer, and all I got was this shitty shirt”, you’ve officially gone too far and strayed into psychosis. You’ve also strayed into this company’s target audience.
Why waste valuable imagination on remembering what your dead relative looked like when you can have their plastic bust filled with their ashes sitting beneath their labotomised scalp?
These people just don’t see the point in bland sentimentalisation. Death is merely another area for you to express your kooky character – just like flashmobs or iPhone apps. And if you can’t afford a full-sized urn, get the “Keepsake” model and sit it next to the Pez dispenser you picked up at Legoland.
ARRIGO SARKY
Reader Comments
August 3rd, 2009
10:42 am
wow this might be the creepiest shit i’ve ever seen. i hope they don’t have kids in the house. this is definitely enough to leave permanent scars.
August 3rd, 2009
10:42 am
is it possible to get any other body parts aswell?!
August 3rd, 2009
10:42 am
this could make for a great horror film plot.
August 3rd, 2009
10:43 am
In Keith Richards’ case he could use this as a giant coke bin. He already snorted his dad.
August 3rd, 2009
10:43 am
What’s next? Flat-screen tombstones with tacky slideshows.
August 3rd, 2009
10:44 am
I think that’s already been done.
August 3rd, 2009
10:44 am
that goatee is going to live on forever. fuck yes.
August 3rd, 2009
10:44 am
good god motherfucking fuckery fuck
sooooo wrong