When will we get the results.

you are a waste of both space and time.

I can say, without a shadow of a doubt, that this is one of he the most embarrassing and petrifying procedure’s a young woman can experience on a first visit to a STD clinic. The feeling is like having a cold metal jack put inside you. And the nurse gets to see the parts of you that only your baby on its way out into the world will get to see.

hahaha vice is getting good again

in the private STD clinics, they get a labrador retreiver to go down on the female patients so they are well lubed up for that bird beak looking thing goin’ in. VIP treatment.

How old is the person writing this? You go for smear tests generally to find precancerous cells so you don’t die of cancer of the cervix - far more important than some silly little diseases. Also, shouldn’t condoms be a bigger part of your disease avoidance. Q & A means fuck all. Finally, why would it be petrifying Rammy? Don’t be so Victorian.

enjoy your AIDS

please die in fire

are you retarded?
all girls have to go through this procedure every 2 years from when they first have sex. No breaking story.
Q&A?? fuckin eck you must be riddled with diseases. You disgust me.

This article really is the lowest of the low, and then you look at the teenage pregnancy rate and STD rate for the UK and actually realise that this article is actually quite apt, because the fool who ever wrote this massive pile of stinking shit, needs educating in a massive way, but to be honest I am sure if she hasnt already been for a smear which has everyone else has pointed out is standard practice in the NHS then she wouldn’t have to write such a stupid damn article which really only highlights how much of a moron the writer is and also the fact she will probably die of cervical cancer, which in a way is poetic justice, because we really dont need people like you breeding with the population and that goes for the rest of you jumped up vice readers who think they really are too cool to have a smear You all need sterilising. Hitler anyone?

I think your comment “I made a mental pact never to never go to an STD clinic ever again.” is both irresponsible and quite sad - Sadly people will read this already having doubts and because of your childish report will not go either-well done little girl

i thought the clap was chlamidia?

This person clearly needs sex education. You can’t avoid STIs from selecting guys carefully and asking them a couple of questions. Use a condom idiot.

http://www.f-risky.co.uk
go and get tested by post and get free condoms!!

http://www.f-risky.co.uk
go and get tested by post and get free condoms

Wow…everyone- it’s Vice. Do you really think this was intended as some form of education. Fuck me. Read many blogs?

Go find someone to speak to.

You guys are dumb, most of Vice is blatantly a load of made up shit, she’s probably had a million smear tests before

SATIRE ANYONE?

So Dull.

perhaps the fact that you were “glad to not have to take the lead for once” reflects more poorly on yourself and the type of men you choose than the male population as a whole?

Oh dear, its quite pathetic - teenagers thinking writing about a GUM clinic is funny or somehow cool. Go back 25 years when everyone was actually shit scared of HIV and things were a little more serious and STD rates and teenage pregnancies plummeted to record lows.

Now everyone thinks its a badge of honour or a rites of passage and can just take pills to cure any infection from the good old NHS.

Little wonder then HIV is on the increase - with many people taking the “it will never happen to me” philosophy on holiday or travelling.

Grow up - they didn’t think you were a “slut” just another pathetic teenager who thinks its funny to go to a clinic about sex.

SLUUUUT!

I think Q and A must be a joke, you guys are dumb, it’s supposed to be funny! chill out

I enjoy going to the GUM clinic.
Piece of piss.

They only start regular smear tests when you get to 25 now.

this is such irresponsible writing! how many young girls are gonna read this and avoid getting a check up because of the scare-mongering pictures and stupid things they’re gonna read here. everyone over 25 (20 in Scotland) will be invited for a smear test every 5 years to detect or prevent cervical cancer, and has nothing to do with STD’s. stupid article.

Young girls don’t read Vice and if they do i’m sure they aren’t STUPID

Use a condom. Learn to write.

bloody hell, you think you had problems with the smear test huh? I’ve had five kids and after the last one my uterus fell backwards!!! now at the age of 50, I have to lie there legs akimbo, while they prod and search for my cervix, sometimes they don’t find it for about 20 mins!!!

Always use condoms. But remember that 1 out of every 50 condoms breaks. And condoms do not prevent the spread of herpes. Definitely get tested for Herpes if you are pregnant and decide to keep the child. Babies born to Herpes-infected mothers via natural childbirth (not C-section) have a hugely increased chances of becoming blind and/or schitzophrenic. Herpes is the leading cause of retinal blindness in the U.S. Herpes can trigger mental illness in a developing brain. Herpes wraps itself around nerve cells.

i love the smell of herpes in the morning!

I am scared of aids

Whilst I agree that this is ostensibly satire, I do however believe that a substantial amount of VICE ‘readers’ are probably below acceptable levels of IQ and are therefore likely to take everything they read in here seriously - hence the importance of maintaining a semblance of seriousness in a thread on this sort of topic.

STI rates are not a joke, as well as teenage pregnancy. Perhaps the writer needs a health scare of her own in order to realise quite how idiotic and blithe she is.

Just a thought.

ANOTHER ARTICLE DISPLAYING THE THOUGHTS OF USELESS DISILLUSIONED PERSON ABOUT A SERIOUS ISSUE, THIS IS SOOOOOOOOO INDICATIVE OF THE USELESS YOUTH OF TODAY!!!! GET A FUCKING LIFE VICE AND STOP MAKING A JOKE OUT OF EVERYTHING.

AND YES THIS IS WRITTEN BY A YOUNG PERSON, PISSED OF WITH HER GENERATION BECAUSE THEY ARE ALL LAY-ABOUTS WHO WRITE SHIT ARTICLES.

She did have a health scare, molten lava pee, duh!

^ CALM THE FUCK DOWN, THIS IS VICE NOT THE FINANCIAL TIMES

to all the douchebags who are claiming ‘ooooh, like, this is vice… we, like, totally get them and their wacky humour, this is totally a big joke, how funny… hahahah’

FUCK YOU.

its not in any way amusing or witty.

its about time you all realised that the sun doesn’t shine out of every writer at vices arse (given, for some of them it does, i have read many an interesting and informing article) but a lot of them are trendoid fuckwits.

wake up to yourselves retards, this article is a huge steaming piece of shit, published by vice or not.

To the fuck-wits who think VICE IS funny, yes you above VICE is funny, but it also chooses to addresses some political issues and health issues that really require a little bit of decency, and so what if I wanna write like the “financial times” the inept writer above, you might take heed and be told that the financial times deals with the economy, not health issues, so you could have at least said something like the guardian or the times, it really only proves my one point that VICE readers are totally ignorant inept stupid people and that goes for the people who write the articles as well. VICE either be a comic or give up trying to write informative political/health related articles cause you really deserve not to be published!!! If you are trying to claim to have a intelligent/quirky/humorous publication by having articles on great writers such as Martin Amis and also writing about political turmoil and sex then I think you really need to rethink what actually you are aiming for, cause your magazine fucking sucks and is again another example of the wasted youth that follow in its foot steps thinking that everything is funny and nothing is taken seriously, cause you would much rather consume your fucking fast food/ American apparel clothes and listen to shite music while you all read utter junk like VICE. No wonder most of you will end up with low-life jobs with nob-end families that just reproduce inept inbreed dickheads, vicious circle.
I hope that the editor of VICE reads this, cause I bet he (yes a man cause only men get to be editors) sits on his fat stinking arse wearing his hoody, when to be honest the hoody was designed for the younger generation and to be honest it looks a bit wrong on a bolding middle-aged man who lick cocaine off the toilet seat in Hoxton. Well Mr Editor give yourself a massive slap on the back for contributing absolutely fuck all to the world, other than contrived shit.

Oi dickhead, this was a blog entry, it’s a personal opinion/experience and doesn’t represent the opinion of the magazines publishers etc. If it were a full blown 2000 word article i’m guessing they would have treated the subject in a more serious manner. And the only reason I mentioned the Financial Times is because it is a serious publication, THE TOPIC DOESN’T MATTER

Oi dickhead? At least start you unwitty retort with some thing other than dickhead!!! how old are you? “The topic” does matter you jumped up std ridden germ-infested piece of sputum!!! Futhermore the editor or who ever checks the internet site for content would still have to pass this shit, cause I am sure if it held racist views or incouraged terrism or paedophileic undertones, then it would have not be aired so openly, so just because its a blog, it doesnt mean that its not passed by anyone of authority who checks it over just to make sure you jerk!!!! Although they did recently put on an article about people liking young boys, so maybe I am wrong, but my point is that VICE really publish a massive pile of shit, why doesnt a youth magazine once in a while actualy produce something worthwhile and of better intellect? Rather than having a magaine that openly airs I am too cool to care attitude. Cause to be honest we are just creating a generation of people who will live in a society that represents this attitude and I think personnally the world is going be very sad place. For god sake someone start up a worthwhile magazine that once in a while can take a witty standpoint, but also address the serious issues underlying all of our lives, without behaving as if it doesnt give a shit at the end of the day!

do people really have nothing better to do then get riled up over a piss-take article?
fuuuuuuck.

no

why are you commenting then?

am i getting riled up? no. i’m commenting because i can’t believe how seriously people take one little article from one relatively small magazine.

relatively small magazine? Are you retarded? Vice is distributed worldwide, with offices around the globe, has been around for many years, with many other forms of publication to their name, and OBVIOUSLY a large internet following. Of all sorts of people. Yes, mostly ignorant fuck heads, but like me, some of them still hold on to the hope that vice hasn’t completely gone down the shitter.
Despite the obvious bullshit that goes on around here, i still hold vice very close to my heart, i have been reading it since i was 17 (now 25) and back in my early days of vice loving, it provided me with a different perspective on the world, one that comforted me and made me feel like i’m not alone.
That feeling is slowly disappearing but the good memories will always have a special place, a place somewhere far far away from what and whom it represents now.

“…we still had to wait for over an hour to be seen (hence the woman above sleeping). Something tells me this wasn’t her first time. Whore…”

Nice hypocrisy. Made me laugh.

And to everyone who’s never been to an STD clinic you’ve never lived. Hope the results are OK.

Eugene thinks vice sold out hahaha

yes i do. hahah.. ha..?

my favourite part of this was the quote, “i decided it was important to make it look as clean and pure as possible. Or, at the very least, not always open for business…” coupled with the picture of the patient in a tight, short black dress. brilliant.