Dear Vice,
I’m an awesome writer. Vice need me… I’m getting tired of seeing the same old bull shit writers preaching their elite of the anti-elite shit in Vice. Check some of my stuff out at my MySpace page. My blogs are filled with stuff but I have ample amounts of stuff to send if you want. Get back to me.
Pingu
So after reading that, we were like: OK, this guy sounds like a bit of a fag, but maybe his writing will be good. We go over to his MySpace page to investigate and we’re greeted with this: "My name is Pingu and I sometimes wish I lived inside video games, ideally the Final Fantasy series. Since September 11th of 1984 I’ve been analysing everything around me in great detail and, as a result, have evolved into the character you see before you today. I have a confidence that borders arrogance yet can also be an overly harsh critic of myself, so with this juxtaposition a nice balance is obtained."
At this point we’re thinking the guy is a total retard, but we even ignore the carbuncle of a Bjork video over on the music section of his page, and decide to give the little guy a chance by having a look at some of his writing. What do we find? 3000 word ramblings on the latest series of Big Brother and pictures of him and fellow douche bags playing paintball.
Check out this profound gem on Donny Tourette: "The lead singer of the punk band "Towers of London"! "Who?" I hear you cry? I had no idea who they were either, so went and checked out a few of their tracks… After I cleared the vomit from around my mouth and brushed my teeth I came to the conclusion that this guy was an asshole. In order to pull off being cocky and arrogant without being labelled a twat, you need something to justify your attitude. Example: The Beatles. Love them or hate them, there’s no denying that they had the talent and looks to be able to turn round and say "we’re fantastic". Donny however fails to impress."
So there you have it. As someone wise once may have said: Always judge a banana by its skin. If the skin is a slimy piece of emo shit, then stamp on it and toss it in the bin.
You may think we are being harsh, but no doubt this attention will give the kid months of material to talk about on his awful blog, so if anything, we’re doing him a favour. We’re sure he’ll be able to sleep happy tonight after he’s finished masturbating into one of his black and white stripey socks he picked up in the girls’ section of Topshop.
Reader Comments
January 23rd, 2007
6:45 pm
this kid is probably so stoked right now
January 23rd, 2007
6:59 pm
I have a myspace page: http://www.myspace.com/demovonnostram
And I totally have all these incredible opinions on shit…I think that you should give me a bunch of fucking loot for it too…I even tried Absinthe before, and had a dream about fucking my friends sister yesterday…support the underground…
January 23rd, 2007
7:07 pm
dhat is loyke SooOO fonny pengU.
January 23rd, 2007
7:37 pm
I hate these Northern Monkeys!
I think I just lost IQ points watching that blog..
Oh well……
Wondering how Emo will interperted in a thousand years time..
Food for thought to get back those precious seconds of life I lost….
January 23rd, 2007
7:51 pm
Wow, that really is shitty writing. Douchebag opinions AND bad sentence structure.
January 23rd, 2007
8:04 pm
i’m glad that she fake laughs so much
ha[covering mouth, i'm naughty]ha, clearly.
January 23rd, 2007
8:32 pm
Jesus, mary and Joseph. At first the writing was histerical because he’s such a tool and the responses were funny… and then we get to the video blog, oh hell no is all I can think as I watched. And that girl looks painfully 13 years old and awkward.
January 23rd, 2007
8:33 pm
her haircut is the reason i don’t want to have kids. i bet her parents are so disappointed.
January 23rd, 2007
9:01 pm
i like how he lists the smashing pumpkins, tool, bjork, nin and radiohead like he hasn’t been introduced to new music since he hit puberty.
was that a pointless rant? yeah, i couldn’t help it…
January 23rd, 2007
9:01 pm
i like how he lists the smashing pumpkins, tool, bjork, nin and radiohead like he hasn’t been introduced to new music since he hit puberty.
was that a pointless rant? yeah, i couldn’t help it…
January 23rd, 2007
9:01 pm
i like how he lists the smashing pumpkins, tool, bjork, nin and radiohead like he hasn’t been introduced to new music since he hit puberty.
was that a pointless rant? yeah, i couldn’t help it…
January 23rd, 2007
9:01 pm
i like how he lists the smashing pumpkins, tool, bjork, nin and radiohead like he hasn’t been introduced to new music since he hit puberty.
was that a pointless rant? yeah, i couldn’t help it…
January 23rd, 2007
9:01 pm
i like how he lists the smashing pumpkins, tool, bjork, nin and radiohead like he hasn’t been introduced to new music since he hit puberty.
was that a pointless rant? yeah, i couldn’t help it…
January 23rd, 2007
9:01 pm
i like how he lists the smashing pumpkins, tool, bjork, nin and radiohead like he hasn’t been introduced to new music since he hit puberty.
was that a pointless rant? yeah, i couldn’t help it…
January 23rd, 2007
9:01 pm
i like how he lists the smashing pumpkins, tool, bjork, nin and radiohead like he hasn’t been introduced to new music since he hit puberty.
was that a pointless rant? yeah, i couldn’t help it…
January 23rd, 2007
9:01 pm
i like how he lists the smashing pumpkins, tool, bjork, nin and radiohead like he hasn’t been introduced to new music since he hit puberty.
was that a pointless rant? yeah, i couldn’t help it…
January 23rd, 2007
9:05 pm
He’s still overqualified to write for Vice UK.
January 23rd, 2007
9:13 pm
The first rule in covering up the fact that you have no personality is to be as ironic as possiable about EVERYTHING.
January 23rd, 2007
9:23 pm
more like pinga
January 23rd, 2007
9:36 pm
wait, he actually said this?
“In order to pull off being cocky and arrogant without being labelled a twat, you need something to justify your attitude”
brilliant. you should have column in vice dedicated to writers who are idiots.
January 23rd, 2007
9:42 pm
Vice needs him like I need to grow a second vagina.
No, wait, scratch that. A second vagina might be kind of cool. Like, it might come in handy.
Somewhere to put my keys.
January 23rd, 2007
9:42 pm
Well he is was delightful. Tools like that give northeners a bad name…the bastard
January 23rd, 2007
9:44 pm
He looks like an embarrasing picture of Gareth Pugh that might appear on “before they were semi-famous fashion designers”.
January 23rd, 2007
9:59 pm
I have a pitch - Give the fucker a column. Just dedicate a page to clueless twats or sprinkle them conservatively throughout the magazine and it’ll be some next-level “don’t” shit. Seriously, everyone already knows people dress like retards - give said retards a voice and let them run rampant as if they’re really contributing to the magazine. (Oh wait, that’s what these message boards are for innit?)
January 23rd, 2007
10:34 pm
*giggle giggle* im so important! *giggle giggle* sighhh oh me!
January 23rd, 2007
10:48 pm
who’s that dogfaced troll sitting next to him?
oh my god. she has her own site. DO NOT LOOK.
January 23rd, 2007
11:14 pm
HERE’S ANOTHER DOUCHBAG, YOU GOTT AREAD HIS SELF-OBSESSED RANTS…
http://www.nesossis.com/flash/designer.html
January 23rd, 2007
11:42 pm
she looks like a fucked up cabbage patch doll who wasn’t held as a child.
January 23rd, 2007
11:45 pm
jesus, can you please dedicate some entire website to trashing these pieces of shit? normally, I get irritated by cruelty and elitism; vice is hardly in a position to be bashing anyone for arrogance. but plain stupidity and bad taste are inexcusable on this preposterous level. shame on this turd and all like him, as well as the dumb, dumb girls who think he is anything remotely approaching “smart” or “cute”.
January 23rd, 2007
11:49 pm
“I’m Roxy Roit, do you know who I am?”
“I’m too cool to be sexual.”
Har de har har har. I normally love northerners, but fuck me. That’s embarassing.
January 24th, 2007
12:54 am
the photographer wasn’t sick, you’re just too fucking ugly miss riot
January 24th, 2007
12:55 am
holy shit i’ll sue you
January 24th, 2007
1:08 am
PWNED
January 24th, 2007
2:59 am
Yes, but is there a single MySpace page that isn’t as fucked as this?
The whole MySpace thing is fucking gay, and pingu is only the tip of the shitstained iceberg.
January 24th, 2007
5:43 am
I want to punch him in the face repeatedly.
January 24th, 2007
6:41 am
Dude, the kid’s only 22. You guys are psychos to want to tear someone up to this degree just for liking you.
January 24th, 2007
7:10 am
awww he’s british be nice
January 24th, 2007
7:20 am
This is by far not the worst idiot writing a blog. He just made a bad error contacting Vice.
January 24th, 2007
7:45 am
For this guy September 11th is the anniversary of the date he began analysing everything around him. ps lovin those titties, or whatever they are called in British
January 24th, 2007
1:25 pm
No I should write for Vice and I DON’t have a “Myspace”
But I’m really “Old”
January 24th, 2007
2:29 pm
NO WAY! IS THAT DUDE STRAIGHT!!!!
NO friggin way Pingu.. i don’t buy it!
January 24th, 2007
3:24 pm
Hahaha. What can I say? Vice do it again! Let’s face it, throw anything your way and you’ll never fail to find some way to tear the shit out of it. Honesty is always the best policy yeah? The problem is this: Your opinion I can appreciate and laugh at…but the bunch of mindless, wannabe urbanites posting their shit in the comments below want nothing more than to slip their wet little tongues deep into the chasm of Vice Magazines anus.
I’m not a bad writer…I know this. Arrogant? Sometimes…and maybe I can’t always justify that, but I like myself and I’m sure in the not too distant future, once I’ve finished picking up all the pieces of my broken little “emo” heart, I’ll be able to repair the damage done this article and the oh-so-harsh comments have inflicted upon me. Maybe then I can move on with my life…holy shit, look at me go.
January 24th, 2007
3:25 pm
P.s. Although it did really hurt for my sexuality to be questioned, I am in fact straight.
January 24th, 2007
3:44 pm
Disregard that, I suck cocks.
January 24th, 2007
3:51 pm
Oh wow…haha. That’s so clever…putting your name down as ‘Pingu’ to make it look like it was actually me claiming to “suck cocks”. Genius. Pure genius. I’m definitely riding the sexuality see-saw now.
January 24th, 2007
4:24 pm
I want to see you pound Roxy. For like three different reasons.
January 24th, 2007
4:38 pm
hey pingu i like you. lets make babies. seriously if your straight lets date? yeah?
January 24th, 2007
5:23 pm
Sorry…I could never “pound” Roxy. She’s my best friend and like a sister to me. Also, the thought of making babies makes me want to vomit. I hate kids…sorry to disappoint.
January 24th, 2007
5:24 pm
wouldn’t you be the one who wants to slip your tongue down vice’s anus? you’re the one who sent them your myspace and blog. we’re just random blog commenters who enjoy stupid shit. dont try to defend yourself. one day you will laugh, shake your head and think to yourself “man, i used to be such a douche”
January 24th, 2007
5:24 pm
wouldn’t you be the one who wants to slip your tongue down vice’s anus? you’re the one who sent them your myspace and blog. we’re just random blog commenters who enjoy stupid shit. dont try to defend yourself. one day you will laugh, shake your head and think to yourself “man, i used to be such a douche”
January 24th, 2007
5:24 pm
wouldn’t you be the one who wants to slip your tongue down vice’s anus? you’re the one who sent them your myspace and blog. we’re just random blog commenters who enjoy stupid shit. dont try to defend yourself. one day you will laugh, shake your head and think to yourself “man, i used to be such a douche”
January 24th, 2007
5:24 pm
wouldn’t you be the one who wants to slip your tongue down vice’s anus? you’re the one who sent them your myspace and blog. we’re just random blog commenters who enjoy stupid shit. dont try to defend yourself. one day you will laugh, shake your head and think to yourself “man, i used to be such a douche”
January 24th, 2007
5:24 pm
wouldn’t you be the one who wants to slip your tongue down vice’s anus? you’re the one who sent them your myspace and blog. we’re just random blog commenters who enjoy stupid shit. dont try to defend yourself. one day you will laugh, shake your head and think to yourself “man, i used to be such a douche”
January 24th, 2007
5:24 pm
wouldn’t you be the one who wants to slip your tongue down vice’s anus? you’re the one who sent them your myspace and blog. we’re just random blog commenters who enjoy stupid shit. dont try to defend yourself. one day you will laugh, shake your head and think to yourself “man, i used to be such a douche”
January 24th, 2007
5:24 pm
wouldn’t you be the one who wants to slip your tongue down vice’s anus? you’re the one who sent them your myspace and blog. we’re just random blog commenters who enjoy stupid shit. dont try to defend yourself. one day you will laugh, shake your head and think to yourself “man, i used to be such a douche”
January 24th, 2007
5:24 pm
wouldn’t you be the one who wants to slip your tongue down vice’s anus? you’re the one who sent them your myspace and blog. we’re just random blog commenters who enjoy stupid shit. dont try to defend yourself. one day you will laugh, shake your head and think to yourself “man, i used to be such a douche”
January 24th, 2007
5:34 pm
hahha your such a cock sucker- go back to stacking shelves in Morrisons or whatever and wash your greasy hair.
By the way your mate looks like horse face grace.
RANK!
January 24th, 2007
6:09 pm
That’s why she has a 3 year modelling contract, her own website set to go up soon and you have…
January 24th, 2007
6:21 pm
hahhahaha this kid will stoop as low as possible! comments-section defense!!!
January 24th, 2007
6:23 pm
Because I really want loads of mindless comments with “This is shit” plastered across the page from morons…haha. If you want to send me some feedback though message me and feel free.
January 24th, 2007
6:27 pm
http://www.roxyriot.com/
hahaha what kind of modeling site mentions butt plugs on the front page?
January 24th, 2007
6:32 pm
That’s her adult website…she has a 3 year contract with that as well as modelling for several other sites etc.
Anyway, I thought this was supposed to be about me? I’ll be forced to cry if too much attention is taken from me being the whiny little emo kid I apparently am…
January 24th, 2007
6:36 pm
I just puked a little bit in my mouth while watching their shit-ass video. If they would’ve been here in person, I would’ve let that shit fly in their faces.
January 24th, 2007
6:43 pm
I’d love to spend the rest of my life replying to comments on here, but I’m going to be signing off now anyway…enjoy yourselves though!
January 24th, 2007
7:56 pm
Vice. you rule! I love how his picture link is pieceofshit.jpeg
January 24th, 2007
8:04 pm
His latest blog is also painful.
January 24th, 2007
8:43 pm
This is so weird, I messaged this guy years ago when he was the only other myspacer in Leeds who liked My Vitriol (a band you probably think is shitty and emo), then I stopped cos I couldn’t be arsed talking to any more of these people who call everything bad “gay.”
That reminds me, fuck you, vice.
January 24th, 2007
9:03 pm
But this really can’t come as a surprise can it? I mean,let’s face it;if you’re not apart of Vices’ crew (and even then,chances are that you’re no all that safe) and you go to them for a writing job there going to try and rip you apart. That’s why we love Vice. They are the masters of abuse.
Anyone remember that poor womans letter from a month or two back?
January 24th, 2007
9:08 pm
gotta disagree with some of the shit people are saying here to be honest. fair enough the guys initial email was a bit cocky and if id have got that id have been looking for an excuse to rip into him too, but credit where credits due. he seems like a decent guy and his writing is pretty good…kind of sucks that people here have just used this as an excuse to trash someone. altho he does comee across as a bit gay i must admit.
January 24th, 2007
9:09 pm
gotta disagree with some of the shit people are saying here to be honest. fair enough the guys initial email was a bit cocky and if id have got that id have been looking for an excuse to rip into him too, but credit where credits due. he seems like a decent guy and his writing is pretty good…kind of sucks that people here have just used this as an excuse to trash someone. altho he does comee across as a bit gay i must admit.
January 24th, 2007
9:31 pm
these are like the worst people ever
January 24th, 2007
9:37 pm
And just the way you like pigeonhole me as “emo” is just, you know, like it’s just all bullshit you know? Just labels man, why can’t you just let me be who i am on the inside of me, like i am a human man, ok? Don’t judge, yeah?
January 24th, 2007
11:12 pm
shit pingu mate! stop posting replys, your giving us more reasons to hate you! that last post was pretty bad! dont write the word “like” every couple of words if your supposed to be a shit hot writer! feel kinda sorry for you, you little northern rascal! delete you myspace and blog accounts, shave your head and get a criminal record, maybe lose a few fights! then come back to them! it seems like more their thing!
also joe, you seem like an annoying cunt! no one really wanted to know any of that! maybe the leeds service crew might sort you out some day! anyway…
January 25th, 2007
11:39 am
Hey buddy i don’t know who you think you are (besides me, obviously) but i don’t appreciate you pretending to be me then coming on here and writing shit trying to defend yourself(me-pingu/not you).
You’re just making the situation worse for me, i have enough trouble from the locals belting the shit out of me at every opportunity for being ‘different’(there words). Man life’s hard, why can’t i just be left alone? I like nothing better than to sit at home with my feet up, a glass of Jacobs Creek in my hand watching 24, why can’t you guys just let me be me? eh?
And another thing stop pigeonholing me as a ‘emo’……thats just not me, if anything i’m a post-modern, non ironic, cyber-orientated yorkshire lad . get it?
To avoid confusion i shall be now know as Pingu yeah? got that? Good, peace out,
Pingu yeah?
January 25th, 2007
11:54 am
I’m the real pingu not that jackass’s above me. And i have to say that even my mother thinks I’m a cunt.
You’re just jealous of my obvious talents, my fav writer is Stephen King and i’ve even been compared to him, so there.
bitches.
January 25th, 2007
2:01 pm
pingu the last dinasour.. he’s my friend and a whole lot more!
January 25th, 2007
2:17 pm
dudes who dye their hair
are
fops.
January 25th, 2007
7:25 pm
he would be a leeds student- for more info on what this great nothern institution is assisting into the world see http://www.myspace.com/huhmagazine
January 25th, 2007
7:27 pm
pingay
January 25th, 2007
9:11 pm
Vice used to be funny. I reckon you are all cuntz now. I am over you.
January 25th, 2007
9:14 pm
Well done VICE. this kid is probs now wanking over the fact that you have now given him over 4 million profile views whilst beliveing he is a true journilst.
( if journilst is spelt wrong sorry my english is very poor thats why im not a writer like he shouldnt be)
January 26th, 2007
5:17 am
Did anyone actually make it past the first 7 seconds of the video?
January 26th, 2007
8:23 am
My life what a cunt. And being a journalist ain’t nothing to be proud of.
January 26th, 2007
1:05 pm
ahahahahhhahahhahhahhhahahahaha y’know i’m torn between sympathy for this pingu character and glee at the sheer hilarity of his (lets call it) niavety.
January 26th, 2007
2:06 pm
his emaiil was bound to get shit on by youi guys but at least he can actualy put some stuff together. the few of his studff i looked at was actually good. im surprised people are slating it so much……vice can hardly point the finger they are becoming more the parody of sugar ape mag from nathan barley day by day.
January 26th, 2007
5:27 pm
nathan blah blah blah
gemma you make me sick!
January 26th, 2007
11:07 pm
yeah I survived the video by looking at her tits…they are pretty nice.
January 27th, 2007
4:53 pm
Bless him, the kid got burned on his own comments, and doesn’t have the heart to delete a girl showing him up because she has pink hair. Noob.
Victoria Valentine
Jan 25 2007 5:02P
Well you need to learn that if you don’t have anything nice to say you shouldn’t say anything at all.
January 27th, 2007
10:00 pm
this guy is 27 ?!!
January 27th, 2007
11:10 pm
jesus.. delete this already. pingu’s getting WAY too much attention
January 27th, 2007
11:56 pm
“Since September 11th of 1984 I’ve been analysing everything around me in great detail and, as a result, have evolved into the character you see before you today. ”
I wonder just how much detail he was analysing aged 3 weeks old?
He makes me like reality tv…
January 28th, 2007
5:05 pm
jesus titty fucking christ that was painful.
January 28th, 2007
5:43 pm
what a faggot emo.
lets kill him
January 29th, 2007
5:20 am
that chick in the video is like a web cam whore
her myspace has a link where see get her tits out
just had a belt to it
thanks vice
January 30th, 2007
1:34 pm
Help MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
February 1st, 2007
3:48 pm
I’d fuck hers.
February 1st, 2007
3:48 pm
I’d fuck hers.
February 1st, 2007
3:48 pm
I’d fuck hers.
February 1st, 2007
3:48 pm
I’d fuck hers.
February 1st, 2007
3:48 pm
I’d fuck hers.
February 1st, 2007
3:48 pm
I’d fuck hers.
February 1st, 2007
3:48 pm
I’d fuck hers.
February 1st, 2007
3:48 pm
I’d fuck hers.
February 12th, 2007
5:03 pm
This guy calls himself a writer? I’ve pissed more worthwhile prose into the curbside snow.
February 20th, 2007
11:30 pm
If, at any point, it is felt necessary to savagely beat this piece of shit with a sturdy iron bar(fuck it, even a none sturdy, nay flimsy bar would do), please feel free to contact me, I have a generous supply of iron bars, and great aptitude for the beating of emo cunts.
March 1st, 2007
5:24 am
Leave me be!
I just want to be freeeeeeeee
March 1st, 2007
11:04 am
my friends keep laughing with me!
March 5th, 2007
12:34 pm
omgomgomomg this was the greatest blog post/set of comments! Thanks so much everybody! Like someone said before this could be a whole new level of donts. Can Vice please scour for more vids like this??? Please ill love you forevs!
April 20th, 2007
11:53 am
Heeeeeelp meeeeeeee!
April 20th, 2007
1:49 pm
This whole posting reeks of jealousy… not because Pingu is anybody, but because he has the balls to do whatever it is he fuckin wants to do… the rest of you will always be common and a little boring/one sided while he thrives, because one day people will take notice of the guy when he’s got more experience…
Vice magazine has always sucked… sorry, just the way it is… all your writers are obviously a bunch of Shoreditch pretentious fucks… And Pingu is right… Donny Tourette is a complete and utter fucknut and almost everybody thinks it… When I saw them last night it made me laugh to see how much effort they had gone to to fucking look punk… oooh lets all run and dye or fringes and wear union jacks… never been done has it?
September 3rd, 2007
5:59 pm
Wow, those two really are fucking hideous.
September 24th, 2007
11:14 am
HE IS SO HOT
November 5th, 2007
5:50 pm
Bummer.
December 10th, 2007
7:08 am
what a bunch of douche waffles….not surprised at all that the sexual action he chooses to perform is giving a blowie
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 17th, 2007
10:54 pm
Is he called pingu because he looks like pingu off Nathan Barley? Because wasn’t that just one big piss take of Vice? So surely if he’s named after a character who is aimed at taking the piss out of Vice then maybe asking for a job there would be rather like a piss take. I hope that it is a piss take because otherwise I will live in fear of having sex ever again in case the condom splits and 9 months later he crawls out. Too far? Who cares,no one fucking reads these comments,they’re just to make people feel like they have a voice WHEN THEY DON’T. oh wait,I can put words together and make trash too,this is AWESOME,can I have a job too please? Thank you.xx
December 23rd, 2007
10:59 pm
That queer danny tourettes is a fucking wannabe dickhead loser.
January 11th, 2009
4:38 pm
when did the loveable penguin turn into a winy emo bastard giving northerners a bad name?
eugh.
January 17th, 2009
12:41 pm
Hi came out of his mother’s bottom and the brain was pooped out subsequently like many other northeners.
January 17th, 2009
7:13 pm
I think he’d fit in perfectly.
January 28th, 2009
1:12 pm
God help us. We’re knocking anyone with potential, and why? Is it because we’re all so fucking insecure and fucked up with our own lives that we have to drag others down too? God knows, but I sure as hell love it. I aint gonna lie. I’ll be heard, whether its through a shit ass blog or standing, in the buff, might I add, ontop of a twenty foot building. Screw the fucking position of ‘trying to be heard’, you’re either heard or you’re not. Don’t stop.
This is one thing I need to straighten with you pretentuous bunch of pricks. There is no such thing as ‘honesty’, when you’re lying through your teeth. How the fuck do you get about it? Oh, you don’t.
The key? Being honest doesn’t mean having a pulsating dick upon your head. No, it doesn’t. It means doing what you do best, doing what makes you feel best, whether that is having a gigantic pulsating dick upon your head. Who knows. But don’t fake being a cunt. When it comes down to it, open your fucking mouth and say the words that need to be heard. I’m sick to death of people with no back bone.
Maybe this post makes zero sense, and maybe I’m alone in my thoughts, but I sure as hell know what I’m talking about. Anyone can post something, anyone can be known for something, but no one, unless they are completely honest themselves can be a successful blogger. Who gives a shit if you’ll have a rep for it? You’re here to post the fucking truth in the most brutal of forms.
Cunts. I’m fed up of bullshit now. So, I’ll walk from this with a contented smile upon my face. My job is done.
PS: Stop acting as if you have something to shout about. You’re just as much a blogger as they are. Express yourself.
January 28th, 2009
11:34 pm
LOL
he has a myspace
January 30th, 2009
6:29 pm
Please listen to some emo music and commit suicide.
January 31st, 2009
7:02 pm
he won.
February 5th, 2009
12:12 pm
oh shizz, the video s been removed sos i can t see for myself :(
February 8th, 2009
8:44 pm
hey everyone. listen to number 151 up there: express yourself.
February 10th, 2009
2:43 pm
he’s sick
February 15th, 2009
12:54 pm
how fantastic that everyone here - including and especially Vice, thinks that the best use of the internet in to bully someone.
The passage you quoted from his blog reads like anything ive ever read on this website - what gives you the right to shit all over someone like that? This is low low low
February 20th, 2009
4:06 pm
lol
that was bare jokes
im stil wiping my teeth!!
with my ass clothe!!!
lmasos
March 3rd, 2009
10:00 pm
To all of you who cares about this,
Shut the hell up. It’s just a laugh. Oh, and stop taking your life so seriously. This emo prick really does talk a load of shit, especially when he is trying to defend himself.
Go cry about how shit your life is and think about how no one gives a flying fuck.
March 3rd, 2009
11:33 pm
Emo reached it’s peak when it made this.
http://swazisagainstluhkwele.blogspot.com/
April 6th, 2009
8:12 pm
dini? will you marry me? i seen your web page and you are soo gorgeous! make love to me!
April 11th, 2009
8:32 pm
Today i have achieved nothing, but i have written a few narky comments to these blog entries. Heres another one.
I wish that I was mean enough to be a Vice writer. I wish that I was just alt enough, just emo enough, just fringey enough, just hipstery enough, just skinny enough, just cool enough, just shoreditch enough, just dissaffected enough, just uncool enough, just affected enough, probably wearing stupid glasses that I dont need, probably reading oyster magazine or something similarly pointless, probably wearing a mixture of commes des garcons and topman ripoffs of cooler labels, probably sporting a stupid foppish haircut and pointy shoes, oh how i wish this were so.
If this utopian existence were reality, I would write aggressive salvos at all of those that didnt get the balance right with their aesthetics, and maybe got confused and matched a ‘emo’ (does that still exist?) haircut with the wrong rayban type glasses. and then I say to my supermodel friend (who wasnt threatened by me because she thinks I’m gay- i wouldnt be gay, but i’d be just gay enough looking, and if it became cool enough i’d try it out) I’d say ‘OMG, did you see that tool, what was he thinking’ or something more trendy and touching on the zeitgeist.
But this isnt the case :( I have far too little bitchyness in my life, far too little bitterness, vitriol, cynicism. I wish that I was better at making people feel small and stupid and worthless.
And oh I wish I had the right shoes and records and glasses and haircut.
April 13th, 2009
3:22 pm
actually, come to think of it, this does read as pretty mean. Ive seen some of you guys, you look like shit, and the writing is patchy. Why is this guy a loser?
April 15th, 2009
10:20 pm
this guy really deserved to be made an example of. how arrogantly he approached you and how large his ego is. but then i imagine its just a front for someone deeply insecure. aw fuck it.
he still deserves it.
May 22nd, 2009
2:20 pm
What an idiot, thinking he’d get a job at Vice claiming to be able to write.
Everyone knows you do it by being able to copy and paste internet memes alongside stupid pictures.
July 8th, 2009
12:39 pm
He has the same name as me, this makes me sad.
July 21st, 2009
9:08 am
People, are you really too idle to run a spell check over your incoherent ramblings before posting?
August 16th, 2009
11:23 pm
In a couple of years of hard graft he might just be as good as me.
September 2nd, 2009
8:48 pm
video removed by user. gutted.
September 4th, 2009
2:22 pm
Pungu you cunt, put the video back up! if theres one thing more embarassing than unqualified arrogance its got to be the retraction of your ego when put to question. (think Kanye and Fish dicks). Fuck them all pingu, if you want to be a cunt thats your state given right.
September 4th, 2009
2:27 pm
Oh and also, the people that you state as your heros would have fucking hated you with a passion
September 6th, 2009
10:20 pm
“My name is Pingu and I sometimes wish I lived inside video games, ideally the Final Fantasy series”
ok homo.
worse than the ‘random’ people of myspace- “i like the beauty of the sound of snow crunching, raindrops on camera lenses and the contrast when seeing tramps standing next to businessmen”. r-a-n-d-o-m. quirky.
September 12th, 2009
12:38 pm
vice..u guys are soo funnny
love u lot meyhnnnn
u guy just officially baited out this kid
awwwww blesss
he is a slight arrogant prick though
:)
September 18th, 2009
9:07 pm
loving wannabe journalists who can’t spell ‘peeled’
October 4th, 2009
1:51 am
all i got to say is lol
October 6th, 2009
6:00 pm
He really did ask for that…