Dear Vice,
I spotted this on the sale rack at some vintage $60-80s-rock-shirt place on Main in Vancouver. It is quite possibly the single worst shirt in the whole history of fucking humanity. Only problem is, I can’t figure out how exactly to classify it: Post-ironic-skeeze-out? Meta-dirtbag?
Yours,
CHRISTOPHER OLSON
Reader Comments
August 28th, 2006
5:48 pm
best shirt ever
(first post boyeeeeeeee)
August 28th, 2006
5:57 pm
sad cunt
August 28th, 2006
6:32 pm
One of the best things i’ve seen today.
August 28th, 2006
6:44 pm
It’s what’s known as “funny”.
August 28th, 2006
6:46 pm
It’s fuuuuuuuuunnnny when college grads overanalyse everything.
August 28th, 2006
10:01 pm
over analyse? you don’t think that the image means anything? look at the shirt and think. and if you find it funny, why is it funny. shit.
August 28th, 2006
10:38 pm
why is everyone getting so bent out of shape about this goofy t-shirt? lighten the fuck up.
August 28th, 2006
11:22 pm
its easy, bitches love money (ie chedda) and men love bitches.
August 28th, 2006
11:52 pm
feels robert crumby, and his work never offended me, so i have no idea why this should. and really, this is relatively tame by today’s standards.
August 29th, 2006
12:12 am
…men love bitches who are too incapacitated to resist…? fuck.
Not offended by image, but that’s cuz dudes sucking out = not a new thing.
August 29th, 2006
2:53 am
Funny, thought we al knew illustrator Franken Hertz.
August 29th, 2006
3:03 am
Depressing, that’s how you classify it. It grosses you out, and then it makes you kind of sad.
August 29th, 2006
3:35 am
how is this “vintage” in any way, shape or form?
August 29th, 2006
3:36 am
agreed. its shit. shit as in ‘human faeces’, not as in ‘the shit’ or ‘good shit’.
its like the smell of human faeces on your fingers.
do you people find that smell funny?
in that case, you’re not funny and you’re human faeces too.
having said that, the human race wouldnt exist if it wasnt for rape and murder, so i can see why people who find this t-shirt print funny have served a biological purpose.
August 29th, 2006
5:13 am
it’s neither rape, nor murder. It’s necrophelia you dumb ass and I’m sure they have their own support groups and other stupid shit that helps keep them in the gene pool.
August 29th, 2006
5:13 am
it’s neither rape, nor murder. It’s necrophelia you dumb ass and I’m sure they have their own support groups and other stupid shit that helps keep them in the gene pool.
August 29th, 2006
5:13 am
it’s neither rape, nor murder. It’s necrophelia you dumb ass and I’m sure they have their own support groups and other stupid shit that helps keep them in the gene pool.
August 29th, 2006
5:13 am
it’s neither rape, nor murder. It’s necrophelia you dumb ass and I’m sure they have their own support groups and other stupid shit that helps keep them in the gene pool.
August 29th, 2006
5:13 am
it’s neither rape, nor murder. It’s necrophelia you dumb ass and I’m sure they have their own support groups and other stupid shit that helps keep them in the gene pool.
August 29th, 2006
5:13 am
it’s neither rape, nor murder. It’s necrophelia you dumb ass and I’m sure they have their own support groups and other stupid shit that helps keep them in the gene pool.
August 29th, 2006
5:13 am
it’s neither rape, nor murder. It’s necrophelia you dumb ass and I’m sure they have their own support groups and other stupid shit that helps keep them in the gene pool.
August 29th, 2006
5:13 am
it’s neither rape, nor murder. It’s necrophelia you dumb ass and I’m sure they have their own support groups and other stupid shit that helps keep them in the gene pool.
August 29th, 2006
5:13 am
it’s neither rape, nor murder. It’s necrophelia you dumb ass and I’m sure they have their own support groups and other stupid shit that helps keep them in the gene pool.
August 29th, 2006
6:01 am
It’s not offensive, it’s just gay. Less funny-ha-ha than funny-queer.
August 29th, 2006
6:01 am
It’s not offensive, it’s just gay. Less funny-ha-ha than funny-queer.
August 29th, 2006
6:01 am
It’s not offensive, it’s just gay. Less funny-ha-ha than funny-queer.
August 29th, 2006
6:01 am
It’s not offensive, it’s just gay. Less funny-ha-ha than funny-queer.
August 29th, 2006
6:01 am
It’s not offensive, it’s just gay. Less funny-ha-ha than funny-queer.
August 29th, 2006
6:01 am
It’s not offensive, it’s just gay. Less funny-ha-ha than funny-queer.
August 29th, 2006
6:01 am
It’s not offensive, it’s just gay. Less funny-ha-ha than funny-queer.
August 29th, 2006
6:01 am
It’s not offensive, it’s just gay. Less funny-ha-ha than funny-queer.
August 29th, 2006
6:01 am
It’s not offensive, it’s just gay. Less funny-ha-ha than funny-queer.
August 29th, 2006
11:20 am
Not funny. I don’t think the author was trying to say it was the most offensive shirt he’d ever seem - just the worst. I think I agree. Mouse rape does not rule.
August 29th, 2006
12:22 pm
Vancouver. That’s how you classify this shirt: Vancouver.
August 29th, 2006
12:32 pm
awsome
August 29th, 2006
12:52 pm
i seen one where the female rat is dead and the male rat is going menatl…
its actually a photo - this shit happens…
August 29th, 2006
2:38 pm
did noone read the bit about it being $60? i find that more offensive than the stupid tshirt.
August 29th, 2006
3:20 pm
If you wear this shirt you are a queer, simple
August 29th, 2006
6:17 pm
there’s an even more sleezy version of that shirt (if you can believe that) where there’s a line of about 20 rats waiting for their turn behind the one fucking
August 29th, 2006
6:37 pm
Here’s one I saw at a Montreal Value Village yesterday: “Dry skin? Free hand lotion! Pump (giant arrow pointing down).”
August 30th, 2006
1:01 am
HAHAHAHAHAHA funny shirt
August 30th, 2006
4:14 am
don’t act like you haven’t done it.
August 30th, 2006
5:18 am
not funny. it’s disgusting. If you think it’s funny I think you would be pathetic enough to consider necrophelia and you should therefore just kill yourself right now. Though it wouldn’t really matter much since you’ll never get laid anyway. what a bunch of fucking losers.
August 30th, 2006
9:33 am
abrasion, black eye, black mark, black-and-blue mark, blemish, boo-boo*, contusion, discoloration, injury, mouse*, swelling, wale, wound, modest violet, mouse, retiring person, shy person, shy thing, absurd, batty, boffo, camp, comic, comical, crazy shtick, dippy, diverting, dizzy, droll, entertaining, facetious, farcical, flaky, fool, fool around, fool-headed, freaky, funny, gelastic, goofus, goofy, gump, humorous,Mickey Mouse, assailable, baseless, contemptible,derisory, little, measly*, niggling*, paltry, peanut*, pettifogging*, petty, picayune, puny, trifling, trivial, unimportant, useless, worthless
babe, baby doll,busybody*, examine, inspect, meddle, mouse*, pry, scent, search, smell, sniff, snoop* bird, blonde, bobby-soxer, boytoy, broad, butterfly, canary, chick, coed, cupcake, cutie, dame, damsel, daughter, deb, debutante, doll, female, filly, gal, jail bait, lady, lassie, mademoiselle, maid, maiden, minx, miss, missy, mouse, nymph, nymphet, piece, queen, base, beggarly, cheap, common, contemptible, derisory, despicable, inconsiderable, ineffectual, insignificant, limited, low, low-down*, meager, mean, measly, minor, miserable, narrow, pettifogging, petty, picayune, piddling, pitiful, poor, puny, set, shabby, shoddy, sleazy*, slight, small, sorry*, trashy, trifling, trivial, unconsequential, unimportant, vile, wretched schoolgirl, she, sis, skirt, spring chicken, teenybopper, tomato, tomboy, virgin, wench, witch, womancontrovertible, fallacious, false, feeble, frivolous, groundless, illogical, implausible, improbable, inadequate, inane, inconceivable, incredible, inept, lame, poor, puerile, superficial, thin, transparent, trifling, trivial, unbelievable, alternative, band-aid, expedient, make-do*, provisional, rinkydink, rough-and-ready, slapdash*, stopgap, substitute, temp, throwaway*ungrounded, unpersuasive, unreasonable, unsatisfactory, unsubstantial, weak, weakly, big zero, casual, cheap, contemptible, dinky, frivolous, inconsequent, inconsiderable, inessential, inferior, insignificant, irrelevant, junior, lesser, light, little, lower, measly, minor, narrow-minded, negligible, niggling*, no biggie, paltry, peanut*, penny ante, pettifogging*, picayune, piddling*, scratch, secondary, shabby, shallow, shoestring*, slight, small, small-minded, subordinate, trifling, two bit, unimportantwishful ironic, jerky, jocular, joking, joshing, laughable, light, loony, ludicrous, nutty, priceless, ridiculous, risible, screwy, side-splitting, silly, wacky, waggish, whimsical, wittyalarmist, baby*, big baby, caitiff, chicken*, chicken liver*, chicken-heart, craven, cur, dastard, deserter, faint-of-heart, fraidy cat, funk, gutless*, gutless wonder,creep, flit, glide, go stealthily, gumshoe, insinuate, lurk, mouse, pass quietly, pussyfoot, shirk, skulk, slide, slink, slip, snake, tiptoe, invertebrate*, jellyfish*, lily-liver, malingerer, milksop, milquetoast, mollycoddle, mouse*, nerd, pessimist, poltroon, punk, quitter, rabbit*, recreant, scaredy-cat, shirk, shirker, sissy, skulker, sneak, turkey, weak sister, weakling, white liver*, yellow*, yellow-belly chump change, nickels and dimes, paltry sum, peanuts*, pittance, pocket money, small amount, small change, small potatoes*, spending money,
chicken feed, Mickey Mouse, nickels and dimes, paltry sum, peanuts, pittance, pocket money, small amount, small change, small potatoes, spending money,
August 30th, 2006
11:47 am
wow, i thought i had too much time on my hands that day when i posted that picture. the rest of you got me beat, especially doctor j. meinschaft!
August 30th, 2006
6:30 pm
I need a human size mouse trap in my bed.
August 30th, 2006
6:43 pm
Buddy, what’s wrong with Vancouver?
Fuck you!
September 1st, 2006
9:28 am
whats with all the ‘queer’ comments?
Most of the gays I know have style.
September 6th, 2006
2:48 am
They were selling shirts in ottawa for 2 bucks that said
“AIDS FREE BODY” in giant block letters.
November 15th, 2006
5:13 pm
I love the look on his face. If I had a nickel…
July 14th, 2009
12:00 pm
LkWcch