First of all making a playlist for a boy you like is going to freak him out, especially if it’s good. If you’re into The Faction and The Saints he’s going to be intimidated by you and not be able to get it up. You don’t want to be too good at his thing. That’s like a boy baking you a huge tray of amazing pastries with little hearts and flowers on them. Or it’s like you being so good at blowjobs he kind of gets freaked out and asked you to stop.
The only way to give this to him is to say you had help from your brother or you got it off VICE or your old roommate helped (say he’s gay so the guy doesn’t get jealous).

Who Spilt My Beer? - The Addicts
These are those goofy UK punks that did “Viva La Revolution.” Nobody took them seriously but they’re back touring again. WTF? Who’s next, The Stupids? Anyway, this song starts out slow and funny so it’s good to go the fridge and get beers to.

Hersham Boys – Sham 69
We were going to put “Kids are United” on this but have you heard it recently? It’s really fucking gay. It’s all about caring and sharing and holding hands. At least this is about wearing, “laced up boots and corduroys” and being called “the cockney cowboys.”

The Greatest Cockney Rip Off - Cockney Rejects
These guys were the real cockney cowboys. They’ve reformed to. So have The Business. So have Peter and the Test Tube Babies. Jesus.

Hard Stuff – Hard Skin
Great skinhead band and they use the exact same riff as the previous Cockney Rejects hit (so does AWK’s “We Want Fun” by the way).

Stranded – The Saints
This seemed a little extraneous but it was impossible to resist. You’ll notice in guy mixes you don’t have to follow that “three of a kind” rule. You can have British Oi for an hour and a half if you want.

Fight - Lars Frederiksen & The Bastards
Are you allowed to like Rancid or even Lars Fredriksen yet? Who cares, this album rules.

Somebody’s Gonna Get Their Head Kicked In – Youth Brigade
Some Texan the other night was trying to tell us the guys in Youth Brigade were all originally Canadian. That would explain their UK sound. This is a cover of that amazing Rezillos classic (who are fucking back together now too!)

Lights Out – Angry Samoans
This song is a guy staple ever since the cartoonist that does Stickboy made a cartoon version of it.

Panthers
We kind of forget what this song is. Anyone? It’s six minutes long so that must narrow it down. He really hollers on this which is why it made sense to put Born Against next.

Riding With Mary – Born Against
Quite possibly the greatest hardcore band of all time.

Miami - Against Me!
Hardcore has gone full circle and become Oi. This fucking anthem makes us want to tear down the walls and shove them up Miami’s ass.

Couch Slouch – DRI
Classic DRI from the Dirty Rotten LP. Remember that song “Madman” where the dad comes down the stairs all pissed off and they’re all, “You want us to stop we’ll stop” and the dad goes, “And I don’t know why you’re hanging out with this guy. He’s a drop out.” Then the song busts in with “Madman, madman, he’ll kick your butt.”

Frustrated – Grave Concern
Awesome Canadian hardcore skater band. Shouldn’t have put them on here because it’s unlikely you’ll be able to dig it up. For the record they sound just like…

Skate and Destroy – The Faction
Not the greatest song on earth but nobody can fuck with The Faction so it’s good to stick on here.

My Girlfriend is in Porno – Draft Beer… Not Me
Another shitty song that boys love. A lot of people used to think this band’s name meant the guy didn’t like draft beer.

Sick Of It - MDC
This is a great build up hardcore song. It’s fun to sing along with when you’re drunk. If you real want to blow his mind dig up something from when they were called Millions of Damn Christians. “El Exijente” or whatever is one of the best songs every made.

Wasted – Black Flag
It’s cool to say Henry Rollins ruined Black Flag but it’s not true. Sure this song is amazing but what about “Rise Above” and “Depression”? Stop lying. You liked Rollins better.

Like Rats - Godflesh
Okay we need to come down from the past ten hours of people yelling. Godflesh is kind of like filling the room with cement and the more you try to move the more you get killed.

Sabbath Bloody Sabbath – Black Sabbath
You need to have some classics in there because when boys were boys they looked up to big brothers like gods and they had certain staples we were all told to worship.

I Know – The Explosion
Okay enough classics. (Just kidding we’ll get back to those later). We need to stick The Explosion in here because we’re going to rap soon and The Desaparecidos is the only way to do that. WHAT? You’ll see.

Manana - Desaparecidos
What a powder keg this jam is. Fuck. It makes you want to memorize it and go back in time to your band seven years ago and teach it to them and then you guys would have been legends. The only bummer with this song is the fucking guy has about 30 seconds at the end of just sitting in a car shooting the shit. This can work to our advantage however because we need to get to Ghostface.

Daytona 500 – Ghostface
This was the best song anyone Wu Tang ever did. If you can get the vinyl single they have a version with racecars zooming by in the background. PS What in the fuck are they talking about in this song? They make Rush lyrics sound like Sharon, Louis and Bram.

My Hood – Young Jeezy
This song is a good bro sing-a-long because you can sing about your hood when it’s somewhere lame like Bell’s Corners or North Hyland Park or whatevs.

Play the Next Man – EPMD
Great “Don’t cheat on me” song. Especially when he goes, “Of course, you was messing with the boss not Bruce Springsteen your boss drove a Porsche.” How do you rhyme boss with Porsche?

Beth – Kiss
What a shitty segue this was but everyone was shitting on the girl mix so much we had so save face fast and show that we’re not a fag. Shit, we’re saying we’re not fags under the title “Beth – Kiss.”

Wild Horses (Live Stripped Version) - The Rolling Stones
This is the point where everyone has a buzz going and they can all sing the chorus with their shirts off and beer spilling everywhere and maybe even a guy barfing over there.

Rosalita – Bruce Springsteen
Have you ever listened to this song (and sang every word) on the way to a strip club? It gets you so psyched you’ll end up buying three songs.

Ain’t Talkin’ ‘Bout Love - Van Halen
This should maybe have gone with Black Sabbath. We only did that previous classic rock mix for what, one song? Anyway, anything from Diver Down is a good bet for Van Halen.

That’s When I Reach for My Revolver - Mission Of Burma
Not sure why but this is a dude classic that all dudes of all time love.

Political Song for Michael Jackson to Sing - Minutemen
It’s obvious why this one’s a bro hit. The Minutemen are basically two buddies from childhood that stayed pals their whole lives and made songs only lifelong friends could make. They even sang about each other in a way that was bordering on a little too bro. How about, “What is religious to Mike Watt? His body is a series of points”? Wait, didn’t D Boon come up with that “Our band could be your life” saying? That “der ner ner nnenerr” at the beginning of Jackass is them too. Fuck they ruled.

Okay that’s it. Give it to him when you’re going to be away for a while and if it’s really good he’ll be too embarrassed to tell his friends you were the one to put it together.