What is this, the Lockhorns? Even if, taking the high road here, your husband's defective penis isn't at least partially the result of your own middleaged bloatification, parading it through the airport can't be helping.

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He’s moving the hat from right to left because tonight’s the night he graduates from prick to full-on shithead.
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Anybody seen the A.R.E Weapons guys recently?
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