DOS & DON'TS

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  It’s OK to have these drunk Russian exhibitionist competitions where Vladki pushes Svetlana so far that she’s lying with her tits out like she’s on a piss-stained stretching rack, but he’s not supposed to get down there with her and get all slinky arching his back like Catwoman. Did he not get the memo? The only time men are supposed to act sexy is when women want a good laugh.
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  DOs & DON'Ts

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  Fuck the safety generation with their earplugs and their bicycle helmets and their not going in the river unless they have their aquasocks on.
  
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  DOs & DON'Ts