DOS & DON'TS

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  Beware of really pretty French girls dancing by themselves in snappy little East Village ensembles. The odds of her having a boyfriend are so incredibly high, she might as well have been planted there by a professional You Embarrasser.
  
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  DOs & DON'Ts

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  In my dreams she’s a superhero called Bubbles and she has the ability to kill her enemies with giant blobs of banana custard shot out of her asshole.
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  DOs & DON'Ts