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This is a video of Mike Bones playing live at an in-store show at Rough Trade East earlier this week. After you’ve finished watching it you can read an interview with our favourite chain-smoking misanthropic troubadour below.

Vice: Is Mike Bones your real name?
Mike Bones: No.

What’s your real name?
Mike Strallow.

Why are you called Mike Bones then?
It’s a nickname I got when I was a kid.

Why?
No reason. It wasn’t because I was skinny, or because I took drugs. Just random.

Which drugs did you do as a kid?
All of them.

Who’s your biggest influence? Is it Bob Dylan?
Hell no.

Why do you sing like Bob Dylan?
Do you think I sound like him?

Well, you do that thing where you sound like you’re half talking while singing.
That’s because I can’t sing.

Who are your favourite modern artists?
Modern musicians don’t influence me, I don’t like them.

You write all your music on a MacBook. That’s quite modern. Maybe you should start carrying around a moleskin – that would be a bit more authentic.
But then, like, if I’m on the bus writing in a book, that’s kind of gay, right?

More gay to write your songs hunched on a MacBook.
My friends would make fun of me for days if they saw me writing my songs in a book.

Yeah, writing by hand is so last year. What are your songs about?
I dunno. A lot of it’s made up.

Lots of musicians ruin their lives for material, maybe that’s something you should consider.
No. My way is easier. I’m thinking about getting an intern who can write songs. Or just sit in a room with me. They’d have to be quiet and demure… and be able to type.

So really you just want some company. You should probably be placing ads in a lonely hearts column instead of asking for an intern.
Yeah, but that’s a lot more depressing. Do you know Casual Encounters on Craigslist? It’s like, “I’m horny and I have a lunch break in half an hour, who wants to blow me in the bathroom?”

Nice. Why are the eyelashes on your left eye white?
They fell out.

Why?
I dunno. Something happened to me.

What did?
I dunno. It was just a bad time.

Why was it a bad time? Did you tear them out?
No. I lost a massive patch of hair on the side of my head then my eyelashes fell out. It was just rough days. I’m not making this up, by the way.

You’ve maintained the hair on your chest though. How do you keep it so healthy and thick?
Irish Spring – it’s a type of soap.

Why are you recording your album in London instead of NY?
I dunno. I don’t particularly like London, there isn’t much I feel like doing, so it’s easier to focus. I feel like everything is my fault over here.

Are you as depressed as your music makes you out to be?
No. I just have bad days. I’m a Gemini.

What happened on the day when you wrote, “Today the world is worthy of my loathing”?
The electricity in my apartment cut off and my rent cheque bounced.

Oh. I thought something really bad had happened.
No, I was just overreacting. I’ve been so honest and forthcoming with you today.

BILLIE JD