So you Junior Mengeles weren't content with your cockapoos and beagadors and pugadoodles and now you've graduated to full-on monstrosities like giant two-mouthed pit bulls and sideways husky-terriers. Disgusting. At least Dr. Moreau had the decency to keep his abominations locked away on an island.

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When you've finally dicked over the last of your friends and hit rock bottom, you can either skip town and try to get clean, or you can dress up like a children's book character named Fresh Starts and barter your way back into their good books with hugs.
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You can tell times are really getting rough when you can’t even leave an old shovel out on the porch without some dickhead kid trying to rip it off.
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