I wish I could tell you whether or not this Venice Beach Robocop’s legs were going “kzzzzzzzt kzzzzzzzt kzzzzzzzt kzzzzzzzt” with each step, but it was hard to hear over the sound of my mouth going “Haaaaa Haaaa Haaaa Haaaa.”

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There are some girls that are so perfect everything they do is in slow motion and when they ask you for a cigarette it’s like an angel farting in your ear.

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Can you imagine how dumbfounding it is to be one of those private investigators who spies on people for insurance companies? Your life would be one perpetual "Are you fucking kidding me?"
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