What is this, the Lockhorns? Even if, taking the high road here, your husband's defective penis isn't at least partially the result of your own middleaged bloatification, parading it through the airport can't be helping.

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Hey, you’ve worked hard all day and if you want to mix yourself a pineapple-soda- and-Popov-vodka cocktail on the way home, who’s to stop you? The world is your oyster, my friend.
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