If you're a psychotic murderer who needs to dispose of body parts across town, dressing up as a Godspell unicycle mime on his way to work is a surprisingly good option. The unicycle case will fit the average-sized kid and people tend to assume the smell is just coming from you.

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This guy's not just having that feeling you get in your face when you've been doing blow for three days straight, are still wearing the same clothes you started in (and haven't even taken off your shoes), and have had to jerk off ten times to keep your heart from exploding through your sternum—he’s actually become the personification of it.
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When you’re huge your pockets are the size of sleeping bags, so why the fuck do you need a survivalist fanny pack too? What are you, the Bear Grylls of leisure?
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