Viceland.com - DOs and DON'Ts

What's so bad about judging a book by its cover? Come on. When you see this guy's mustache and the ridiculous clothes behind it you just know he's a good guy. In fact, if you met him and he ended up being lame you'd be all disoriented, bumping into tables and crying, "I don't know who my friends are anymore. I don't know who to trust," like Sean Penn in The Falcon and the Snowman.

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COMMENTS BELOW

Date: Apr 10 2008 01:00:32 AM
Author: smanhole

its my biological father

Subject: LGL?
Date: Mar 14 2008 08:02:53 PM
Author: LGL?

Is that Mingo from Les Georges Leningrad? i64.photobucket.com/albums/h195/skatterbrain1025/lesgeorges.
jpg

Subject: go!
Date: Feb 21 2008 02:10:08 PM
Author: go vice

If you met this guy in a bar, he would grab your arm and incoherently mumble some kind of half English, half Mexican Santaria shit into your ear, and then you'd become fixated on the symbol on his shirt and it would impart to you the meaning of life.

Subject: captain tardo
Date: Dec 21 2007 03:40:23 PM
Author: dizzle

eye of the tiger...head of a retard

Subject: srsly
Date: Sep 12 2007 03:26:01 PM
Author: just another yahoo

i'll have what he's having.

Subject: wotacunt
Date: Aug 24 2007 06:58:37 AM
Author: ohana

if that man walked into my surgery i'd prescribe opiates

Subject: ha
Date: Apr 22 2007 10:01:59 AM
Author: amy

is that Bob Fossil's mexican brother I see?

Subject: Gavin
Date: Feb 02 2007 10:03:51 AM
Author: a-man

Is that the "handsome" McInness boy?

Subject: EH?
Date: Jan 14 2007 06:49:56 PM
Author: New Yorker in Montreal

Isn't that Donny Miller????

Subject: mariano
Date: Dec 28 2006 02:51:01 PM
Author: boston

fuckin homie used to be a pro skater and shit!

Subject: &£UG$
Date: Dec 27 2006 11:35:11 AM
Author: Joe

I bet he's on acid and fucking loving it

Subject: cool people find(make) cool clothes
Date: Jul 08 2006 06:36:52 PM
Author: alex

choosing friends by the clothes they are wearing is really cool.

Subject: ??
Date: Jun 25 2006 02:00:18 PM
Author: M

choosing friends by the clothes they're wearing -> DONT

Subject: sweaty splatter sleaze
Date: Jun 02 2006 07:45:33 AM
Author: noseptum

It's also Joe Spinell's cousin - you could imagine him acting sweaty and quoting lines from "Maniac" - 'It's OK, I won't hurt you (slobber slobber)'.

PS I am gay

Subject: If I met him at a bar
Date: May 17 2006 03:55:15 PM
Author: Miss Woo

I'd steal his beer. And his wallet. And his dignity (well, he lost that already)

Subject: Self improvement
Date: May 16 2006 05:17:23 PM
Author: Aboikos

Imagine him saying:

"HI. I can help you. I can help you help yourself!"

Subject: salvo's rock
Date: May 14 2006 04:14:48 AM
Author: dt

my new hero is a man in a fluro jacket and mo...
my eyes hurt but im loving every second of it

Subject: yeah
Date: May 13 2006 12:12:27 AM
Author: Mr.J.

This guy knows how to mop a Walmart floor........ with a vengeance!!!!! All I have to say is keep America clean bro'.

Subject: shit or bust
Date: May 10 2006 04:01:52 PM
Author: modernape

either someone just stuck a finger up his ass or he just snorted some hairy crank (or both - now you're talkin')

Subject: very well done
Date: May 10 2006 11:41:00 AM
Author: Killer

Bravo. Wait, maybe I'm just a little drunk still. Hank I love you

Subject: huh?
Date: May 10 2006 06:28:11 AM
Author: deez n-u-ts

this guy is a 'do'? ok, i miss the old new york too, but this dude isn't part of that, outside of the pizza shop reference. even then, mexicans do it cheaper and probably don't smell as bad as this guy.

ok, the growing up gotti approach works too.

Subject: Hey
Date: May 09 2006 09:28:12 PM
Author: dude

Its Cheech looking for Chong

Subject: gino glam
Date: May 09 2006 07:06:50 PM
Author: Minou

Fast forward "Growing up Gotti" 30 years avec bankruptcy and no handlers for the asocial little twats …

Subject: it's that fucking guy again
Date: May 09 2006 06:53:50 PM
Author: weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

the one that was in the dos twice in one issue.

isn't it?

Subject: down at 'fat tonys'
Date: May 09 2006 05:17:11 PM
Author: Peter Murphy

where's my pizza Guiseppe? put that grandma tracksuit in your locker, put your uniform on, & get back on the fucking topping line. capische?

Subject: yeoh!
Date: May 09 2006 04:30:39 PM
Author: Your mom

Check out that fucking jacket, what a tiger

Subject: oh dear
Date: May 09 2006 11:02:07 AM
Author: coops

Har Mar is looking a little worse for wear. Always wondered what would happen to the guy after he went through all those girls he'd put on layaway.

Subject: well
Date: May 09 2006 09:51:46 AM
Author: $

Giovanni Ribisi's slightly more attractive brother.

Subject: separated at birth
Date: May 09 2006 09:34:26 AM
Author: -

its Giovanni Ribisi's brother!

Oops. I guess as with Communism and that Biz Markie kids' show, cuter in theory than in practice.
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She’s SMS-ing her friend to say that she’s “gone all out with the Stevie Nicks vibe tonight” but what she’s neglected to include is that even in her elongated “bubble perm and tranq addiction” period, Stevie never ever looked as tragic as this.
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VICE GUIDE TO TRAVEL

REPORTAGE

FRAMMENTI DAL FRONTE
I soldati inglesi tornano a casa a pezzi.

SKINEMA

THE XXXORCIST
Chris Nieratko: "Come Dorothy nel Mago di Oz ho ripetuto tre volte:“Accetto il pompino e non faccio causa".

INTERVISTA

FACCIA DA CULO
Ryan McGinley intervista Jack Walls, l'artista, ex-membro di gang, ex-eroinomane ed ex-fidanzato di Robert Mapplethorpe.

BLOG

E QUELLA CHE ROBA È?
L'amore è un diritto di tutti, ma questo non significa che puoi ingravidare un bovino se la tua ragazza ti rifiuta.

INTERVISTA

I DOCUMENTARI E LA FOLLIA
Frederick Wiseman è il migliore regista di documentari al mondo. Ma è anche molto probabile che non abbiate mai visto i suoi film.