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We asked four clothes-affiliated artists whom we like to give us their take on one of the finest folk-art traditions that America has developed—the beer bong.
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Comments:
Subject: Butt Falcons Date: Aug 19 2005 12:22:57 PM Author: Doctor Scroggins this is the best feature i've ever seen in Vice, besides Dos And Donts. Trust me, I'm a doctor. Subject: ? Date: Aug 14 2005 01:25:44 AM Author: bastard people still post on viceland? amazing. Subject: asdfass Date: Jul 29 2005 09:28:50 PM Author: jetlag love the pics..and I too love wearing undies that split my slit...it a bitter sweet sensation , especially if the undies are made of 85%polyester 15%cotton and 2 sizes too small....that makes for wicked friction.. ooooohh-laaaa-laaaaaa Subject: pics Date: Jul 27 2005 04:08:12 AM Author: chest rockwell "h" is always funny Subject: The Management Date: Jul 25 2005 11:09:47 PM Author: Crab Yeah, shut the fuck up you fuck-faces!!! Subject: Black Niggars Date: Jul 25 2005 11:04:23 PM Author: Porch Monkey my poem: fuck, fuck, fuck, suck, suck, suck, fuck-face. Subject: more cock Date: Jul 23 2005 04:41:14 PM Author: anna Let's have some naked guys once in a while. Subject: shut it Date: Jul 22 2005 10:54:58 AM Author: alex Subject: Comments Date: Jul 18 2005 10:18:36 AM Author: The Management The comments section of our articles are for accolades, affirmations and various other types of praise to be rightfully bestowed upon our hard working and extremely talented staff. Be Aware: Any attempt to criticize or any way call our beloved employees on their shit will be promptly removed. Thx, The Management blah blah blah blah, shut the fuck up! Subject: the joke Date: Jul 21 2005 07:08:26 PM Author: Hal "the joke" Laptingstach I have an extemely not that bad joke>OK" ahem ahem ahem HOw many adorable little apeish negroids does it take to change two light bulbs?Give Up? fourteen. six gajillion nine and sixteen mega gazillion bazillion jillion coons Subject: stupid waste of time Date: Jul 21 2005 02:45:46 PM Author: stupid waste of time Subject: Gayness in Viceland Date: Jul 18 2005 07:13:55 PM Author: God The management is a gayrod. Subject: Comments Date: Jul 18 2005 10:18:36 AM Author: The Management The comments section of our articles are for accolades, affirmations and various other types of praise to be rightfully bestowed upon our hard working and extremely talented staff. Be Aware: Any attempt to criticize or any way call our beloved employees on their shit will be promptly removed. Thx, The Management Subject: Brendan Donnelly Date: Jul 17 2005 07:58:19 PM Author: unwound Who is this delightful man, and where can one procure those "27" t-shirts? Did he make those with the antlered owls as well? I like you people of Vice! Thanks for all the neat stuff. love--> x-goth stoner indie-nerd guy in Norway. Subject: fubar Date: Jul 17 2005 05:29:18 PM Author: ... Shotgunning is better then beer bong anyday... Subject: sensi Date: Jul 13 2005 06:00:11 PM Author: weed one who cares about the girls. i'll take beer bongs and nick at nite anyday. Subject: rub my tomatoes Date: Jul 13 2005 04:59:27 PM Author: AfricanViolet Vice you are a special snowflake in a blizzard of negativity and hurt-feelings. These pictures are hands down ballin-out-of-control-hot. So simple yet so profound. What man at the end of the day would not like to look back and say to his grandchildren..." While others pursued law and medicine, I had a higher calling...photographing glorious young lasses imbibing alcohol from beer-bongs." Honestly, Kern has it made in the shade. It's so tasteful as opposed to that raw dog in your face meat curtain affair (which also has its place in the universe). Cheer up and let the divinity of Booze and TnA wash over you. Or think of it like Bruce Willis and his rating scale in “ The Last Boyscout”, I’d cut off the tip off my pinky for a week with miss blonde and brunette (provided we had the drug rug bong and mucho natty light). I need a job. Subject: behr bawngz Date: Jul 13 2005 05:02:13 PM Author: tr3ndy f@990t beer bongs are the truth...there is noting better then gravity yanking a full can of old milwalkie down your throat....i swear like 3 of em and your toast....on a related note i drank rum,shlitz and grace hot sauce mixed together the other day...needless to say my farts were not pleasent.. oh....and i would gladly lick every inch of those girls...including their brown cherio and arm pits...i like it nasty Subject: sweet jesus Date: Jul 13 2005 02:43:38 PM Author: j e s s e those models are angels Subject: Dating Date: Jul 12 2005 05:28:00 PM Author: Slatanic If I could get these hoes to come over, I'd say, "How I’ve waited for you to come I’ve been here all alone Now that you’ve arrived Please stay a while And I promise I won’t keep you long I’ll keep you forever" Subject: Absolutely Perfect Date: Jul 12 2005 10:23:52 AM Author: 1,000 Songs The horribly lame Brendan Donnelly drug rug funnel (hippies and beer = wasted beer) is completely transformed into a thing of beauty by that magnificent lesbian / crotch shot / camel toe / aphex twin photo. Richard Kern is a Golden God. Subject: Is that a beer bong in your pocket...etc Date: Jul 12 2005 08:41:21 AM Author: Helmet Harry, The Danger Dog In response to an earlier post by "hot girl" there is in fact nothing more interesting then little titties. Except possibly for vaginas. Also the use of models to encourage the use of Beer Bongs is a clever subliminal message. It tells me that women will want me if I introduce beer bonging to my life. And the pleasing result is that after a few hits on said beer bong I feel these effects in action. Not only do women want me, I suddenly find that every girl is beautiful, I am amazingly witty, and I project my voice in a confident manner. Subject: aphex pussy Date: Jul 10 2005 11:35:00 AM Author: tom damn. i am so lost in the idea that there are women w/ aphex panties out there. Subject: .. Date: Jul 10 2005 04:37:46 AM Author: grossed out blondie has some dirty ass feet. Subject: please die... Date: Jul 09 2005 08:13:10 PM Author: Kill Whitey Now I now this is an EXTREMLEY tired cliche, but if you think it's so bad then why don't you give it a try and do it better? Gripping about how poorly done other people's art, writing, music, and such is is barely tolerable from professional critics, but from you fucking knobs it's just pathetic. Christ no one is on all the time, and this zine comes out pretty damn often. I think they do allright for thew most part, and boring cliche number two- if you don't like it, don't fucking read it. Really now, shut the fuck up and go fucking die. Oh, and Brad? Even if you're just being ironical, you're a fucking choad. Thanks for helping to keep my hate alive and well. Wow, I actually care enough about how fucking stupid you people are and how miserable it makes me to know that you exist that I'm taking the time to write about it. This is great! Thank you all so much. And thank you, people of VICE, for the free something to read on a Saturday afternoon. Keep it coming. Subject: How'd he get the greens to pop like that Date: Jul 09 2005 03:33:37 PM Author: Blinky Look at the green on her panties -- it pops like dayglo. Either my monitor rocks, or Kern can process a mother fuckin photo. Subject: resurrection Date: Jul 08 2005 04:47:29 PM Author: secretary Matt Damhave will crush Tara Subkoff in the highly anticipated design-off. Subject: 6pack girls Date: Jul 08 2005 03:47:08 PM Author: old milwaukee dry drinkin beer is too slow, beer bong is the way to go. Subject: tits and bongs? Date: Jul 08 2005 08:28:37 AM Author: hot girl hey, dont get me wrong, I love little titties as much as the next girl but JEEEZUS! cant you think of something a tiny bit more interesting? Subject: yes Date: Jul 08 2005 04:40:05 AM Author: thong hey i love your mag! so many overeducated young men trying to grasp the meaning of what it is to be cool! its also great to see another big global publication peddling its version of coolness to desperate tryhards the world over! this is important stuff! Subject: good Date: Jul 07 2005 05:22:00 PM Author: focusdaily fucking awsome pictures section Subject: 2,5 Date: Jul 07 2005 02:25:28 AM Author: -::- Beerbongs in order to drink American beer at about 2,5 % alchohol. Yeah, that is som caaaazy shit going on! Subject: weak issue, vice Date: Jul 06 2005 11:37:16 PM Author: stu what the fuck happened to this magazine. I was fucking around on the internet and came across this magazine last month and I thought it was pretty interesting. But beer bongs???? Doesn't drinking beer rank pretty low in terms of habits that could be considered a vice? BOOORRRINNGGG! Subject: real chicks Date: Jul 06 2005 06:11:05 PM Author: morgaine It is really refreshing to see women that are not airbrushed. I do wonder if the blonde might have some circulation problems? Great issue. Does using a beer bong always lead you straight to soft porn? Subject: beer bongs Date: Jul 06 2005 01:01:43 PM Author: G i think its a funny idea to spiff up beer bongs this way. i've never thought of it, mine were always very plain and practical, garden hose style. but the pictures, sexy as they are, just aren't what i expect from vice. they're almost juvenile, they're what kids in grade 7 who actually beer bong fantasize about. Subject: g! Date: Jul 06 2005 10:02:10 AM Author: me This issue sucks, but these pictures made it suck quite a bit less. Still, beer bongs? What is this, sigma cappa dickass? Subject: This issue Date: Jul 05 2005 10:37:39 PM Author: cpnfused really really sucks. Who bought vice? Urban outfitters? Subject: getting vice in dc Date: Jul 05 2005 09:13:42 PM Author: veal go up to the register in the tower records in alexandria. they will give it to you if you are 18+. Subject: lord almighty Date: Jul 05 2005 07:21:29 PM Author: TnA Mr. Kern and Vice I salute thee. Those pictures are fantastic. God Bless America. If you do not like the pictures than go blow it out yer vent buddy. Can I get Vice in DC? Subject: How awesome... Date: Jul 05 2005 12:30:45 PM Author: Fantasmo would it be to give these girls a couple of beer bongs and then run them both through a wood chipper? Hmmm...Hmmmm? Subject: Group Hug Date: Jul 05 2005 09:16:16 AM Author: Brian So much anger, I'm almost glad you guys (sic) took me off your mailing list..... almost. Subject: weak Date: Jul 04 2005 04:52:06 PM Author: Geez This issue is lame. Subject: :-] Date: Jul 04 2005 09:53:27 AM Author: COOL2 wow. going throught his shitty issue was completely worth it when i scrolled down and found these delights unexpectedly waiting on my screen. these pictures are so great they make me want to lie on my bathroom floor nude, spread eagle, and jack off. with complete assurance knowing my parents aren't home. thanks vice. Subject: crap Date: Jul 04 2005 06:18:51 AM Author: meh wow you can see the same things on a million different soft pr0n sites. where'd the vice originality go? topless lipstick lezzies are in a bajillion different mags, the old vice would've had real dykes instead. Subject: tities Date: Jul 04 2005 05:59:18 AM Author: dvda these bitches are hot. I dont know why there topless in some of these pictures but I think it is a good example for all females though. all pictures of girls in vice should be topless, it is so hard to find tities on the internet Subject: for some reason, my back hurts Date: Jul 04 2005 05:11:59 AM Author: Protuberance Is that chick wearing Aphex Twin underwear? Shit, how I'd love for her to sit on my face. Subject: toe-rific Date: Jul 04 2005 01:29:35 AM Author: gnu finally, a photo shoot that pays homage to the wondrous camel toe. Subject: ok Date: Jul 03 2005 10:06:22 PM Author: sht It's 3:15, a great time to get drunk and turn all lesbian. Subject: Pussy Hole Date: Jul 03 2005 07:22:37 AM Author: Chad It was great imagining that I was the invisible man in these pictures (molesting, going all ape shit rubbing my face in their hot pussies etc., rubbing my big black cock on their tit's, ass-holes, hot little pussies etc. jizzing in their mouths like Vincent Gallo does to Chloe Sevigny in Brown Bunny). Subject: Stupid is.. Date: Jul 02 2005 07:00:07 PM Author: JD tits are tits. stop bitching Subject: boobies Date: Jul 02 2005 06:45:34 PM Author: YAY boobs Subject: dlas;fdlk Date: Jul 02 2005 01:04:46 PM Author: jacknips goddamnit these are stupid. |
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