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Wired Magazine can write a 25 page prayer to the CEO of Google but if they interviewed Haiko The Hentai Master they'd learn a lot more about the ins and outs of the internet than they'd ever dreamed. Comments/Enlarge | See all


Taking in an exchange student seems like a bad decision when he walks in on you in the bathroom or wants to learn about baseball. But come on, how good is the part when you and your friends teach him that the American way to answer the phone is "Hello fancy lady?" or that it's customary to present your host with a 10-inch swath from the bottom of each garment after a dinner party? Pretty good. Comments/Enlarge | See all






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Monotrona Says the Darndest Things

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INTRODUCING: BURGLEMIR THE FROST GIANT

Monotrona Says the Darndest Things


Monotrona as she appeared in a 1983
business text book (she was a kid model).

The first time I saw Monotrona she was on a kids’ show. She was yelling about outer space and children were dancing around her because they didn’t know what else to do. It was weird. The second time I saw her was at a tiny art gallery and I laughed my head off—not a “ha ha, that’s funny” laugh. No, it was more of a hysterically nervous “what is going on?” laugh. Monotrona is fucked up. She is a totally mental lady who performs the weirdest songs you’ve ever heard in the strangest way you can imagine. Of course, somewhere beneath the layers of makeup, leotards, props, and weird electronics, there must be a real person—a living and breathing woman who goes to the store, has parents, and rides the subway, right?

“There are six superbeings (and a robot) in our world today,” she patiently explained to me. “They are Ooka, Jing Pow Ki Poo, Joey the Mechanical Boy, Hawkeye & Firebird, The Might Mun and Burglemir. They aren’t heroes, except Hawkeye & Firebird, and The Might Mun. They each have a sort of a problem, a sort of psychosis. Some have a purpose and some are just insane. Some used be humans and got mutated. They form a unit—a unit that may save the world or ruin it.”

Then, at an early-evening set at Brooklyn’s Luxx, she debuted the new character Burglemir the Frost Giant. I know it sounds a bit much, but this is not random insanity. It’s fucking fascinating. What could be more refreshing than watching a lady in white robes and a long Gandalf beard fanatically stomping around a miniature cardboard city with kick-ass, minimalist electro beats in the background? Her music and ideas always find a perfect balance between silliness and creepiness, not to mention the fact that her songs are the best thing to happen to the sputtering corpse of “electro” since asymmetrical haircuts. True, it is madness, but there’s a method to it—an inimitable, hilarious, genius method.

JENNA PAMESON
Hawkeye & Firebird is available now on Menlo Park Recordings.

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