TOO DRUNK TO ROCK

If crack vials were ghosts, ODB would be Pac-Man. After being caught with a pocket full of marijuana and various other Schedule III narcotics, there's no question where the rapper stands on drug use. He likes it. He'd like to tell us about it too but after evading federal officers and referring to the DA in his hearing as "a cum dumpster," it's no surprise that we were unable to talk to the Ol Dirt Dog for the real gospel on the subject. We can't talk to him and we can't talk about the new Wu album (what can you say about it?- it sucks). All there is left to do is talk with the rest of the Wu soldiers about the days of getting fully laced, up in the borough of Shaolin.

VICE: Do you guys only smoke weed out of fonta leaves or Dutches? I mean, would you smoke out of a pipe or something?

Raekwon: Putting a pipe to your mouth... it makes you feel like a crackhead.

GZA: Like sucking the glass dick. Maybe if it's a wood pipe, though. Like on some Popeye shit.

Do you think it's possible to smoke too much weed?

Gza: Yeah, we do it all the time. Sometimes you smoke so much that you feel drunk. That's blunt drunk, that's what we call it.

Raekwon: Niggas don't know either, weed'll make you throw-up. For real.

RZA: Yup. For real, for real.

There is some talk of shrooms on the new record. Do you like to fuck with them?

Raekwon: Shrooms is organic, right RA?

RZA: Yeah.

Raekwon: So that to me ain't a drug. It's just a chaser. If it's in effect a nigga will take a piece of that.

I know you guys used to fuck with a little coke, right? Twisting woollies?

Raekwon: Yeah, I remember back in the days when we used to smoke coke blunts. Putting coke up on some nice green, it would look like Christmas. (Singing while sprinkling imaginary blow on his blunt) "Tis the season to be jolly..." You know how pretty that shit was looking.

U-God: Even on some dirt weed that shit was looking good.

Raekwon: But that was like ten years ago, them days is over.

There was a story that came out last year about you all being linked to some big ecstasy ring. I can't really picture you guys rubbing up on each other in the clubs on some ecstasy shit though.

GZA: Hell no.

Raekwon: I never liked ecstasy. All it is, is like Mescaline for the new millennium. It's just another upper. It's like a damn Anacin.

RZA: An Anacin? Huh.

Raekwon: Yeah, an Anacin with a little bit of Hennesey on top.

PROF. HARSHKOVITZ
Wu-Tang's The W (Loud Records) is out in stores now, but it's a piece of shit so who cares? Also look out for new full-lengths by Cappadonna and Ghostface dropping in a minute.