HOOTS MON! IT'S HAGGIS TIME!The Technology Behind Scotland’s National DishWORDS AND PHOTOS BY ANDY CAPPER Och aye, Jimmeh! Is there anything more satisfying in life than a wee dram and a haggis after a hard day’s kilt-wearing and Sassenach-hating? And is any haggis more dreamy to eat than a venison haggis made from the innards of a fine West Highlands deer that yee shot yerself? The answer is “Och no, Jimmeh! There cannae be a tastier puddin’ anywhere on this fine earth!”
We recently traveled to the West Highlands to film something called Deer Diary for VBS.TV and this is what I learned about the technology that goes into the making of Scotland’s national dish. Here’s a recipe so you can make one at home for yer wee bairns!
| First, fly to Glasgow and then drive four hours through mountains and wilderness to the Ardnamurchan Estate in the West Highlands. It’s the most westerly point of the British Isles. |
| Meet up with a gamekeeper who will take you on a deer stalk in the wilds of the mountains. Ours was called Niall Rowntree and he ran the estate with the help of his “gilly,” Grant. |
See all articles by this contributor Anonymous, on May 15, 2009 wrote:
The poem mentioned here is not the Address to a Haggis. This poem actually begins:
"Fair fa’ your honest, sonsie face,
Great chieftain o’ the Puddin-race!
Aboon them a’ ye tak your place,
Painch, tripe, or thairm:
Weel are ye wordy of a grace
As lang’s my arm."
Also, why the fuck did they included stalking in a haggis article? To get the maximum Scottishness out of the article. Haggis is rarely, if ever, made with venison. It is made with the pluck of a sheep. Venison haggis might be served - with a delicate whiskey jus - in a restaurant or pretentious pub. | | Anonymous, on May 7, 2009 wrote:
swarovski scopes? whoa now | | Anonymous, on May 5, 2009 wrote:
what’s with all the cornflakes? scatlands beautiful. it’s a shame an army of alcoholics with massive chips on their shoulders. Even more moaney than the Welsh they were. SORT IT OUT. | |
| boggle_brains, on May 4, 2009 wrote:
if you ask me, its not all the blood and gore that put me off haggis, its that last photo of the chubby little boy that did it for me. thats enough the put me off anything | | Anonymous, on May 4, 2009 wrote:
I dont know what all you guys are talking about. drop the whole stoic act!!! this is all pretty nasty, admit it | | Anonymous, on May 4, 2009 wrote:
great photos!! good job vice | | Anonymous, on May 2, 2009 wrote:
Oh god that bambi fetus killed me! It looked like my pet chihuahua Josie who I am holding oh so tightly right now. | | Anonymous, on May 2, 2009 wrote:
Miller, wtf?! did you actually go all the way to scotland to write this load of bollocks. | | Anonymous, on May 1, 2009 wrote:
Is this supposed to put me off? Obviously I knew how haggis was made. So what! It’s no worse than sausages. | | Anonymous, on May 1, 2009 wrote:
I love a wee bit haggis. Ya big jessies. | | Anonymous, on May 1, 2009 wrote:
jings crivins help ma boab | | Anonymous, on May 1, 2009 wrote:
irn bru
bawjaws | |
| AnilM, on May 1, 2009 wrote:
Maybe you need lots of whiskey to eat this? I rather have some proper venison cuts. | | Anonymous, on May 1, 2009 wrote:
so that’s the cunt that killed bambi ah weel el still gae tae the chip shop fir meh haggies supper an wash it doon we a can o iron brew | | Anonymous, on May 1, 2009 wrote:
Reading this while working in a kilt shop and playing with my sporran. I’m going to award myself an A- for Scottishness cos I don’t have cancer. Yet. | | Anonymous, on May 1, 2009 wrote:
um.. why doesn’t grant get a quad bike?? | | Anonymous, on May 1, 2009 wrote:
ha the guy holding the entrails looks like a weird cross between rick moranis and john bird (bremner, bird and fortune) | | Anonymous, on Apr 30, 2009 wrote:
Word. Camo silencer for when you want to be neither seen nor heard. True sniper shit. | | Anonymous, on Apr 30, 2009 wrote:
guys. calm down. first, he probably has blood on his face because he shot the deer and was ’blooded’, its a weirdass ritualistic thing that a lot of hunters do with first timers where they smear the blood of your first kill on your face. its usually done to kids after their dad has coaxed them into killing bambi.
second, yes the gun has a camo sleeve over a silencer (and a foldable tripod), throw in the expensive scope and its a laughably over the top set up for shooting the occasional deer in scotland but it is a pretty sweet rifle nonetheless. sadly the stock looks like its painted camo which is ugly as sin. | | Anonymous, on Apr 29, 2009 wrote:
wow, Scotland is beautiful. so much in fact, that I can forgive them for like something a disgusting as haggis | | Anonymous, on Apr 29, 2009 wrote:
that first picture is really amazing! very national geographic | | Anonymous, on Apr 28, 2009 wrote:
"the guy holding up the entrails looks kind of like Stuart Murdoch from Belle and Sebastian"
that’s a bit of a stretch dont you think? | | Anonymous, on Apr 28, 2009 wrote:
yeah like that kid needs any more meat in his diet. you aren’t supposed to have a double chin at seven. | | Anonymous, on Apr 28, 2009 wrote:
No more venison sausage for me anytime soon. Who the fuck came up with this shit? | | Anonymous, on Apr 28, 2009 wrote:
Gross. This is almost as gut-wrenching as ’Blood of the Beasts.’ | |
| skidmarx, on Apr 28, 2009 wrote:
so. i was just checking out this gun. is that a camo silencer on that bad boy? i’ll admit i’m far from an expert on rifles but i haven’t seen one like that before. | | Anonymous, on Apr 28, 2009 wrote:
you know this really didnt take place in scotland- no kilts. what, they dont make camo kilts? get the fuck out of here | | |
| skidmarx, on Apr 28, 2009 wrote:
is that a feeding trough in the first photograph? isn’t that cheating? baited field or whatever you call it? whatever happened to the sport of all this hunting shit? fox and hound shit? | |
| lazy eyez killa, on Apr 28, 2009 wrote:
i like how it’s called stalking instead of hunting. it brings a sketch element into the picture. like the deers are looking over their shoulders and keeping their doors on chains. | | Anonymous, on Apr 27, 2009 wrote:
haggis is fucking tasty :) | | | Next 30 comments > |
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