MY COKE DEALER
INTERVIEW AND PHOTO BY JEFF RUGGLES
We’ve all got dealers we like to call “our guys,” but aside from their numbers, general delivery hours, and where they usually are at 1:30 AM Saturday morning, how much do we really know about them? I was introduced to my current guy through a mutual friend. I’ve been calling him for over a year and he’s always been reliable as well as super friendly, so I figured maybe he would actually let me sit down with him and get acquainted. It probably helped that I told him I’d double my usual purchase.
Vice: How’s it going?
Coke Guy: It’s going all right, taking it easy.
What did you want to be when you were a kid?
I wanted to be an astronaut or a pilot. I just like the sky. I was always into space movies and sci-fi.
So do you like what you do now?
Yeah. I enjoy it, you know? I know guys who got into it and don’t like it. They just need the money, and they’re always stressed out thinking about the consequences. But me, I really like doing it.
What’s the secret to dealing drugs but not becoming a paranoid lunatic?
Just keep a tight, tight group. I don’t associate myself with a lot of people. You only ever see people get into trouble because of someone else opening their mouth. Cops never know what’s going on until somebody talks.
Do you ever have deliveries where you’re like, I have a bad feeling about this?
Yeah, I get that feeling once in a while. And sometimes you can start to feel like you’re invincible. It’s easy to forget that you’re doing something illegal. It becomes as normal as getting up and drinking a glass of water.
Are your parents around? Do they know?
My dad was never around. My mother had suspicions when I was living with her. I think she has an idea, but she doesn’t ask. I just make sure to not make it obvious that I make a certain amount of money. I take off my jewelry when I’m at home and if someone needs a ride I tell them I don’t have a car.
So what do you tell her is going on?
Oh, well, I work. I went to school and have had a real job for about ten years.
So you were legitimately working before you started dealing?
Yeah, it’s good to have something else going on. The person that brought me into this grew up in the middle of it, all the way uptown where it was drug infested. But I didn’t grow up around it. I was going to school and into TV and movies, but then I started hanging out with him more and the rest is history.
Have you ever had a customer you had to cut off because he was spinning out of control?
Yeah, there was one guy who got to the point where he would try to give me stuff from his apartment. He’d offer his TV, anything he could to get some. And look, we’re here to make money, not to fuck up people’s lives. I didn’t want this dude to be out on the street. He must have also been getting stuff from other people too ’cause it got to the point where you would go to his apartment and it was just a futon on the floor and nothing else. I stopped dealing with him. I heard from someone that he eventually went to rehab and moved in with his parents.
What about weirdo customers, have you got a lot of those?
There’s one who stands out. He’s this gay guy I deal to and he has this thing with suits and tuxes. I come over one night at three in the morning and he’s fully dressed up, and he has a suit laid out for me to wear. And, like, to fuck in. He’s usually a cool dude, but I think he’d probably been drinking and taken a lot of stuff before he called. I was like, “It’s cool, dude, but that’s just not my thing.” It was way too weird. He still calls me.
Do you go back?
Yeah, yeah. He’s cool, but once he gets in those moods he turns into suit man.
OK, one last question: Just to quash the myth once and for all, are there baby laxatives cut into our coke?
Look, they put a bunch of shit in there depending on where you get it from, but I never heard about fucking baby laxatives.
See all articles by this contributor Anonymous, on Oct 23, 2008 wrote:
nice article...he seems like a nice guy, what’s his number so i can get some coke ;) | | Anonymous, on Oct 22, 2008 wrote:
’’my pusher stacks 32 dif drugs’’
haha fuckin well done you! | | Anonymous, on Oct 21, 2008 wrote:
yawn | | Anonymous, on Oct 20, 2008 wrote:
Coke Is Bad. | | Anonymous, on Oct 20, 2008 wrote:
my pusher stacks 32 dif drugs. | |
| sabinaaa, on Oct 19, 2008 wrote:
my hook is a bum ass. | | Anonymous, on Oct 19, 2008 wrote:
so much anger! live and let live people, and if you don’t like it... don’t read it | | Anonymous, on Oct 18, 2008 wrote:
Whaddup? You guys votin’ OBAMA?!
| | Anonymous, on Oct 18, 2008 wrote:
"Anonymous, on Oct 17, 2008 wrote:
now find a guy who deals DMT, Mushrooms and good, high grade LSD. that’d be an interesting interview. To make this more interesting, i read it really fast, skipping over poly syllables etc to get the full effect.
then i read it again, two more times faster."
i know just the chap...
hell, lets go all out and get a tweaker, speed dealers are far more fun and paranoid than this douche;i want mayhem. i want him to just whip out a potato gun and start pinging spud pellets at the interviewer/"the po-po"
grow balls and get the pcp dealer next time, for shits and giggles.
man-up vice, man-up. | | Anonymous, on Oct 18, 2008 wrote:
yeah that’s my nikgkgka!!! | | Anonymous, on Oct 18, 2008 wrote:
psh...definately not gonzo nor a big deal.
anybody can ’doo’ that "shit".
The Jesuit kills everybody in a couple years anyway. They successfully sank the Titantic. coke fukkin’ cock smoke, ass to throat choke who fukkin’ cares. | | Anonymous, on Oct 17, 2008 wrote:
n1gger, ploise! | | Anonymous, on Oct 17, 2008 wrote:
Really? Did you think up this interview while doing coke off his ass?
I hope your editor stole your stash | | Anonymous, on Oct 17, 2008 wrote:
god, VICE you are such douches.
My boyfriend met the editor once and after a long conversation, eventually called him a prick... I’m so glad he did. I sucked him off just to celebrate. | | Anonymous, on Oct 17, 2008 wrote:
WTF? Coke dealer? did you think this was good? your reachin son, Pathetic interview, lay off the coke you idiot.
| | Anonymous, on Oct 17, 2008 wrote:
only moderately cooler than that retard-photo issue you avant gardeners dolled out
JUST SO FUCKING EDGY, my mom and dad would totally hate you | | Anonymous, on Oct 17, 2008 wrote:
baby laxatives?!?
what the fuck!!!!
lmfao | | Anonymous, on Oct 17, 2008 wrote:
thanks vice, i was unsure whether coke was sub culturally cool enough to go with my ksubi jeans and my air force ones but now you have confirmed it i can get my snort fork out and double line.
what’s your dealers number, i want a longer rack attack...
jackass | | Anonymous, on Oct 17, 2008 wrote:
now find a guy who deals DMT, Mushrooms and good, high grade LSD. that’d be an interesting interview. To make this more interesting, i read it really fast, skipping over poly syllables etc to get the full effect.
then i read it again, two more times faster. | | Anonymous, on Oct 17, 2008 wrote:
Gimp | | Anonymous, on Oct 16, 2008 wrote:
I’ve always stumbled upon it being cut diazepam a couple of time, sweetener and caffeine powder.
But even in those recent cases, its pretty close to being as pure as the driven snow. | | Anonymous, on Oct 16, 2008 wrote:
i always wonder if my dealer has a mum, id like to imagine him wit his mum, hes a badass, badasses dont be nice to their mums do they? | | Anonymous, on Oct 16, 2008 wrote:
God this article is pathetic. Like, drugs are so cool y’know! So you do drugs, big fuckin deal. What are you, 16 years old? You make me want to quit drugs forever just so I don’t have something in common with you morons. | | Anonymous, on Oct 16, 2008 wrote:
Whats his number? Would be great to find someone reliable who doesn’t piss you about for hours, keeping you hanging on then not turning up so as to completely ruin your whole night!! | | Anonymous, on Oct 16, 2008 wrote:
all be legal.............one day i hope | | Anonymous, on Oct 16, 2008 wrote:
Kudos to dealers, all of us without the balls to really get involved rely on you. And I’m sure I’ve seen more pot addicts go off the rails than coke heads I know I dont think coke is all that bad. ...but baby laxative? I didn’t know that existed. I’m a terrible parent. | | Anonymous, on Oct 16, 2008 wrote:
Dude got like a quarter gram for writing this piece of shit | | Anonymous, on Oct 16, 2008 wrote:
wheeeeey
i wanna be one :) | | Anonymous, on Oct 16, 2008 wrote:
being a drug dealer is not something to be proud of. the sad little lives people live. and i dont care if you had a bad childhood. grow the fuck up. | | Anonymous, on Oct 15, 2008 wrote:
this interview take something that is, by nature, really interesting and makes it as dull and boring as an interview with just about anyone. part of it, i suppose, is that the coke dealer isn’t an interesting guy. i read a good article in New York magazine about a coke dealer, but the coke dealer was actually interesting. the coke dealer here is just your run of the mill coke dealer. | | | < Previous 30 comments | Next 30 comments > |
| |
