t’s pretty gay (and very, very lazy) when people write an intro to a piece that is basically the highlights of the interview rewritten in a few lines. Therefore, I totally refuse to mention anything I talked about when I interviewed Philadelphia’s second hottest rap group, Plastic Little, who sound a bit like when the Beastie Boys were good. I won’t talk about the Lindsay Lohan story or snorting tea or buying heartburn tablets from a dealer. No siree. What’s worse is when people end their intro with a fact that is then mentioned directly after the first question. That always fucks me off. Did I mention that Kurt from the group lives with Amanda Blank?
Vice: You’re from Philadelphia like Spank Rock and Amanda Blank. Do you guys hang out and stuff?
Si: Yep.
Kurt: I live with Amanda.
How is that?
Kurt: She’s never there, so it’s cool, haha. No, it’s nice. We don’t have ceilings. It’s kind of falling apart—it’s got holes in the floor so you can see straight to the basement.
Jayson: It’s a fixer-upper.
Kurt: But, it’s nice. It kind of looks almost like an installation.
Max: Yo, tell them about the shrine.
Kurt: Oh yeah, there’s a Buddhist shrine in the basement.
That sounds weird. Have any of you guys got it on with Amanda?
Jayson: Having sex with her? Erm… no. That wouldn’t happen
Why not?
Jayson: Well, I dunno…
What about any of the Spank Rock guys?
Kurt: I dunno, I don’t think it’s her style.
Oh. Is she more a fan of the ladies?
Kurt: No, she likes cock.
Jayson: I mean, we’re not her style.
Who does she go for?
Kurt: You.
Jayson: She goes for someone like you—sharp guy, well-dressed. She needs someone with a nice future ahead of them. We don’t have futures.
That’s a real shame. I heard a story about Spank Rock, fishscale and Lindsay Lohan.
Si: Oh, I heard that story. I wasn’t there, but they did a show in L.A and Pase Rock played at the after party and Lindsay Lohan was there. You know they have that song “Lindsay Lohan’s Revenge”? Well, he played that song and apparently she was so fucked up she didn’t realise the song was about her. So, anyway they end up back at her hotel and they end up partying and stuff. That’s all we know.
Is fishscale popular in America?
Si: Pink cocaine? Erm…
Kurt: I haven’t seen any. In Philadelphia it’s very hard to get. I don’t understand how you guys even get drugs here in the UK.
Jayson: Where does it come from?
I dunno. Where do you guys get your drugs?
Kurt: Erm… I buy acid reflux tablets from a dealer. I can’t afford health insurance. That is pretty normal in the States, though. I know someone who once snorted cocoa powder, not mentioning any names…
Jayson: That was me. I did it because it tasted good. I remember one time I snorted a tea bag. I was on mescaline at the time, so needed to chill out. I went into a café and got a tea bag and cut it open and snorted a line of it. They didn’t even chuck me out either. That was a strange day.
PRANCEHALL
Plastic Little will be touring the UK in July. Their next single “I’m Not A Thug” is out in early September. www.myspace.com/plasticlittlerap
