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| Photos by Brad Troemel | | IN THE LAND OF THE JUGGALOS - PART 1A Juggalo Is King
“ What is a Juggalo? A dead body / Well he ain’t really dead, but he ain’t like anybody that you’ve ever met before / He’ll eat Monopoly and shit out Connect Four.” –ICP, “What is a Juggalo?”
With the possible exception of the Jews, no other group has eaten as big an amount of shit over the course of its existence as the Juggalos.
From the earliest reviews of the Insane Clown Posse’s singular brand of circus-themed swear-rap, the general contention has been that there is no way music could possibly sink below this point. This is the bottom. It’s almost as if ICP intentionally cherry-picked the worst aspects of goth, punk, gangsta rap, rave, nu-metal, and real metal to create a sub-culture so universally repulsive as to forestall any attempts at outside involvement. Basically, they trumped all previous claims of FTW, and then wrote a nearly unlistenable song called “Fuck the World” just to hammer the point home.
But while everybody else was busy acting like they were above gems such as “Bugz On My Nutz,” Violent J and Shaggy 2 Dope were forging a media empire for their base of extremely devoted followers, the Juggalo Family—sort of like a rap-alliance between Deadheads and the KISS Army. The Family spread rapidly across the poorer swaths of the Midwest and established a huge and more or less self-sufficient underground with its own distribution network, porn, churches (seriously), charities, file-sharing services, anti-drunk-driving coalition (JADD), initiatory secret society, GLBT activist, pro- and backyard-wrestling circuits, and two MySpace variations (ninjaspace.net and the possibly defunct myjuggalospace.com).
If you want some scope of their national coverage, just plug the word “Juggalo” into google. Wait, actually I just tried that and it really wasn’t that impressive, but trust me, they are big and forever getting bigger. I know, because I just spent the weekend with a good 6,000 of them.
 The Gathering of the Juggalos is like the horror-rap equivalent of the Hajj. ICP started it in 2000 as a two-day festival in their native Michigan to showcase the bands on their label, Psychopathic Records, but over the next few years it metastasized into a four-day-long acid-tit-and-rap binge, drawing thousands of Juggalos from across the country and featuring performances by outside rappers such as 2 Live Crew, Three 6 Mafia, and Vanilla Ice.
Except for a lucky three-year spate in northern Ohio, the Gathering has been forced to move every year due to crowd issues (the second one in Toledo resulted in a full-scale indoor police riot), and up until the third year, ICP had yet to make it through a complete set on account of audience overenthusiasm. This year’s was being held at a biker camp just outside the 350-person townlet of Cave-In-Rock right on the southern border of Illinois, an hour’s drive in all directions from anything approaching civilization.
I’d been hesitant to dive into the Gathering on my own, but at the last minute a Welsh Juggalo named Daff I’d emailed at juggalonews.com called me and offered to be my guide. I bought my tickets through ICP’s website, and two days later I was Juggalo-bound.
TO BE CONTINUED:
IN THE LAND OF THE JUGGALOS | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 |
See all articles by this contributor Anonymous, on Jan 25, 2010 wrote:
Wow, you do know that every genre of music has it’s own juggalos? Metal has the long haired beer drinkers, country has all the cowboy hats in the world, indie has the organic strange smelling people dancing slowly with their eyes closed, and rap has all the rich white kids driving around in their cars with the loud stereos at 2 am. People are always going to listen to what makes them happy, so why the need to pick on the juggalos did any of them personally come into starbucks and smack the tall latte out of your hand? Or is your life so boring that you just need a scape goat to make you feel better about the wrongs others have done to you? I won’t keep you any longer I’m sure your order is up at the panera bread your sitting at reading this right now. Good day. | | Anonymous, on Jan 25, 2010 wrote:
the definition for Juggalo should be "shit for brains" | | Anonymous, on Jan 9, 2010 wrote:
My (deceased) son was a juggalo and his crew kjm / swj have been the most loving and caring peeps I’m proud to know.Haters judge them by their looks/clothes/face paint/music preference...should take the time to get to know some juggalos-you might just change your opinion. I know I did!! mmfwcl from this juggalo mom | | Anonymous, on Dec 28, 2009 wrote:
i lived in a backword-ass suburb outside of seattle for some months. never seen so many of these idiots in one place in my life. as pathetic a bunch of losers as they are, they are also strangely fucking frightening-- holy shit. i’d overhear their conversations; no sense of awareness of anything at all. not art, not beauty or aesthetics, not politics, not philosophy, not psychology, not culture, not the world as a whole. they are absolutely purely ignorant reactions to a world they cannot and do not want to comprehend. take the worse aspects of aggressive jocks, bullies, outcasts, racists, rednecks, and rappers and put it all into the body of some awkward dork kid who intensely hates his parents and himself and directs all that hate toward society and you have a juggalo. that’s the rule. these people who say they’re a juggalo but finished school or whatever, they’re the exception to that rule. i can’t express how happy i was to move away from that place. | | Anonymous, on Dec 28, 2009 wrote:
This article is fucking BRILLIANT. 5 stars, would read again. | | Anonymous, on Dec 21, 2009 wrote:
hey my name is honney and im a local to cave n rock,eldorado.i wasnt a fan just came to have fun and raise hell, your music is way deeper and ur fans r way more really like family,unlike our biker ralllys...now i have been researching ur music and even bought some c.d.’s! The cotton mouthkings are great too! can u believe i never even herd of them untill then, its like a black whole here..thanks for comin to the south!honney swaggirt....email...swaggirthonney@yahoo.com | | Anonymous, on Dec 10, 2009 wrote:
Waits for Juggalo Altamont | | Anonymous, on Dec 9, 2009 wrote:
"of course the world hates free thinkers" who buy their indiviuality en masse at the mall. you’re not being yourself when you’re being the self someone told you to be. | | Anonymous, on Dec 9, 2009 wrote:
Wow...this is the first I’ve heard of Juggalos and I’m from the Midwest...this confirms my suspicions that you are all a bunch of bumbling idiots with no real brain between your ears. Get a life | | Anonymous, on Nov 25, 2009 wrote:
juggalo gatherings remind me of ren fairs, with more nudity. People like to get primitive in groups. And people like to break taboos together (i.e. get naked, trash stuff). I just wish it didn’t pass for bravery or comfort. We need a fucking revolution already. | | Anonymous, on Nov 22, 2009 wrote:
...stumbled on this article while researching the ’syko sam’ murders... and it was like xmas to find and read your piece- makes ’rolling stone’s "investigative" pieces look so lame (yet another undercover ATF agent infiltrates a biker gang- whoopee!!) i have a master’s degree in english and teach and edit a bit so i know excellent reporting. i’ll come lurking soon if i can expect more kick-ass pieces. | | Anonymous, on Nov 16, 2009 wrote:
Downtown Tucson: Forgot to mark the calendar. ICP, means stay the fuck away from here. There’s 10000 cops and the ghetto bird make circles for the last 30 minutes. Tucson, from some reason, has an enormous amount of juggalos. People might be under the impression this is some kind of hippy town. Wrong. There’s more juggalos than any other subculture. Does someone know why? I think it’s the abysmal school system here. But even degenerate retards who look like they got hit in the face with a shovel need something to believe. And those of you who feel compelled to state how you’re a juggalo with a brain or a job or a dick longer than 3 inches: give it up. It doesn’t matter how quasi normal you are, you still listen to shit and freely associate with the lowest form of human scum to walk on two legs. | | Anonymous, on Oct 29, 2009 wrote:
come on, some people are so stupid...there is no way that you have met every juggalo in the world, dont judge an entire group by the actions of one person. I am a juggalo, im black, im a college student, i have a job, i dont smoke or drink. kinda screws up your whole stereotype, dosent it? There is not one particular type of person that listens to ICP. Its just a band its like Gratefull Dead or Kiss, or NWA or Tupac (ok, mabey not Tupac, but u get the point) its music. I listen to it because i am an adult and i FEEL LIKE IT. I dont judge u for your favorite type of music, dont judge me for mine, please | | Anonymous, on Oct 22, 2009 wrote:
"Damn. I’m a 49 year old juggalo who is VERY successful."
There has to be a caveat somewhere. | | Anonymous, on Oct 21, 2009 wrote:
Damn. I’m a 49 year old juggalo who is VERY successful. | | Anonymous, on Oct 8, 2009 wrote:
This is the most incredible saga I have ever read. More! More! | | Anonymous, on Oct 5, 2009 wrote:
my name is james yo fuck these juggalo haters if u want to try to kill us start with me im 16 and ill be down till the end ill worn you if u hert fam ill kill you so bring it bitches | |
| Beef, on Sep 24, 2009 wrote:
Much clown love to Morton! Woop woop! | | Anonymous, on Sep 24, 2009 wrote:
I been down with the clown since way back...i seen my homies die an they aint ever comin back... i walked through the streets my painted face held high...an i know my homies is lookin down on me from way in the sky...but to anyone disrespectin the juggalo name...thinkin we all lame...like we’re playin some game...i got some news for ya...we can break you all down...cause nothin can fuckin stop an army of....wicked clowns | | Anonymous, on Sep 21, 2009 wrote:
I hope the next Juggalofest will be booked in the same weekend as a KKK convention. | | Anonymous, on Sep 20, 2009 wrote:
all woman who become juggallos look like lesbians and their tits instantly sag when they make their agreements to join this dumb ass lifestyle of idiocracy | | Anonymous, on Sep 20, 2009 wrote:
WHAT KIND OF A FUCKING NAME IS JUGALLO.
these people come up with the dumbest shit | | Anonymous, on Sep 20, 2009 wrote:
its not that i hate them for liking music, its just that theyre a bunch of fucking idiots who do nothing but annoy the shit out of people and talk about the corniest shit ive ever heard of.
| | Anonymous, on Sep 20, 2009 wrote:
fuckin idiots | | Anonymous, on Sep 20, 2009 wrote:
this article is superb journalism in a magazine that from my limited readership normally has 0 journalism.
i am very impressed.
if you think this article sucks, stop reading vice. you’re not hip enough or cool enough or intelligent enough to be worthy of pretending you don’t read vice when you go party and meet girls. | | Anonymous, on Sep 20, 2009 wrote:
i feel like this article belongs in a sociology jounal | | Anonymous, on Sep 19, 2009 wrote:
i think this is one of the most sincere and honest articles i’ve read on this site in a long time. i was reeling with disgust the entire time, yet it was compelling to the point of beauty. yeah, that was kind of faggy. | | Anonymous, on Sep 19, 2009 wrote:
Baggy tits!FTW | | Anonymous, on Sep 18, 2009 wrote:
I don’t really like how in the beginning of the article you mention that juggalos are closely related and similar to Deadheads. Deadheads wouldn’t run around knocking over trashcans, polluting ponds, or ’thrashing’ to thoughtless music like ICP creates. Shame on you
-Deadhead | | Anonymous, on Sep 18, 2009 wrote:
People like this get made fun of in Cali. | | | Next 30 comments > |
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