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DOS & DON'TS

Oh, now look what you’ve gone and done. You’ve made me put you in the DOs for pissing up against a dumpster like a little stray cat. You’re in biiiiig trouble, young lady. Comments/Enlarge | See all


Here’s an argument for letting your kids do drugs at the earliest age possible. When people get into drugs too late in life they amalgamate all the things the desperate teenage drug addicts who runaway to the big city at 15 do; complete with the old "getting an STD on their first week in the big city from the Polish waiter" chestnut. Comments/Enlarge | See all






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LINGERIE PARTY - PART 2

In The Hood



STORY BY JOHN MCDONNELL
PHOTOS BY SANNA CHARLES


Forfeit time! Thembi had to run up and down the walkway on the 7th floor of the tower block shouting, “I love cocks!” while kids in the car park below heckled her. If this was me, I’d be totally embarrassed but she seemed to take it on the chin.
We had a break every 20 minutes to go and down some more shots of Courvoisier and blue Aftershock. What is in that stuff? It’s like distilled mouthwash mixed with SodaStream syrup and petrol. It makes you feel really fucked up.


After a couple of hours the girls kept flashing their bums and trying to pull each other’s trousers down. At points, Cynthia had an expression on her face like Saddam’s before he was hanged. i.e. barely suppressed rage mixed with total fear.
Cynthia said that a good way to test the vibrators was to press the tip of them beneath the end of your nose and if it made you sneeze, then it would definitely do the job. I tried one out but it had no effect. It seemed to work for Sonia though.


Just to be sure, she got Rudey to try it out. She did this by “giving ‘er one from be’ind” to Sonia. Kimberley (right) was pretty embarrassed by this.
Soon after, Infinity showed that the vibrator is not just some type of instrument for sexual pleasure, but instead, with a little belief, it can become a beacon of hope that can change the way we look at the world and bring entertainment to others, i.e. a microphone.


This is a photo of Lena, Infinity’s mum. According to the girls, she was very flexible and could still do the splits. She was also a total rager. The girls said that if Lena was at the party then they’d be behaving a lot less subdued than they were tonight.
Here they are, being totally subdued.


The girls couldn’t wait to try on some outfits, yet Cynthia didn’t seem so keen and kept saying that it was almost time for her to go home.
Jade told Cynthia she couldn’t afford to buy anything so was informed that she wasn’t allowed to try any outfits on. Despite this, she went and put on a nun’s habit anyway. Check her out!


Rudey opted to wear an interesting but fun take on an air stewardess uniform. Cynthia was very keen to leave by now. She hurried the girls up and packed up her suitcase of sex toys.
“Phew! I don’t have to pretend I’m a girl anymore.” Thank you, girls! Thank you, Cynthia! Thank you, lingerie parties in the hood! Thank you, world!



LINGERIE PARTY | 1 | 2 |

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