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You can complain about the “Asianisation of Australia” like one of the dead guys in Romper Stomper or you can see it for what it is: a ton of good outfit ideas.
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These European art-crowd guys have to be carefully timed. You don’t want to be there at dawn when they have golf-ball eyes and are telling you for the tenth time what they think of Cerith Wyn Evans. But if you can catch them at beer number three and bump number one there’s definitely going to be some high jinks worth hanging around for. Comments/Enlarge | See all







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Jammer Vs. Skepta

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We saw this in France. It’s a shirt that says “sexy” and no, you are not wrong about the size. It is for an eight year old. French people think little kids — without pubes, and vaginas about the size of a pinhole — are sexually attractive. Le rape. C’est cute.
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Photo by Jamie-James Medina

TOP PRODUCERS

Jammer Vs. Skepta



STEPHEN SAYS: “I don’t like it. It’s just it’s the lyrics are like rapping but it doesn’t appeal to me. It just doesn’t register with me. This is the worst thihg you’ve played me so.”
While the rest of east London has been busy adding up how many New Era baseball caps they’ll be able to afford when that multimillion pound album deal finally comes along, top producers Jammer and Skepta (along with Wiley) have been busy creating and shaping the sound that white middle-class journalists have dubbed “grime”. For years they stood by and watched MCs ride their beats all the way to the bank, get signed, only to ditch them for a more commercial sound. Fast forward to 2006 and they’ve both decided to pick up the mic and, by some ridiculous grime coup, have managed to establish themselves as the biggest MCs on road.

Skepta “The African Hottie” and Jammer AKA. The Murkle Man’s hilarious diss-track “Swag MC Burial” are taking shots at half the grime scene, with Skepta’s verse single-handedly putting an end to rival crew SLK. Anyone who says clashing doesn’t do you any good would do better to keep their trap shut.

Vice: What’s with all the name calling?

Jammer
: We’re just cleaning out the scene, getting rid of all the swag MCs. I’ve been here from day, so anyone who I say is appalling is over. I said Double O and Napper are the swaggest MCs in the scene and now they go to raves and get air.Lethal B is a wasteman. He called me out on Westwood, so now when he goes to Boundary, I know he’s shook. It’s called elimination.

Who’s the top producer, Skepta or Jammer?

Skepta
: Me man, standard.

Jammer: What? You could never talk to me when it comes to top producer.

Skepta: Shut up, I’ve had much more hits than you.

Jammer: “D.T.I.”—one hit wonder, blud. I’ve had bare classics. Skepta started off makin’ bootlegs, I started making hits. “Birds In The Sky”, “Take You Out”: bare classics.

Skepta: Are you dumb inna your head piece? You’re always copying my flows—and I get more girls than you.

Jammer: How could you get more girls when you say, “It’s the boy with the picky afro”?

Skepta: Nah man, you don’t get more girls than me. You’ve been getting a few since the “Murkle Man” video came out but I get more than you, standardly.

Jammer: Skepta gets white girls and transvestites. I get all of the quality chicks that you see in the scene and the industry chicks. Skepta’s girl is the fat one from the “Murkle Man” video —that’s his wifey.

SHANTY MEDDLER
Skepta’s album, More Than Grime, is out in May on Nu Era. Jammer’s Top Producer and “Murkle Man” single are out really soon.

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