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You can’t go wrong with big huge glasses because it shows you enjoy your handicap which helps us feel less awkward about it (too bad blind people don’t share this sense of self-awareness).
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She’s in a dirty bathroom with flip-flops and blue toenails but those overalls take away the suffering and make everything OK. They’re like your parents coming in when you think there’s a monster under the bed. Comments/Enlarge | See all







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Fuck your penis. It’s not the boss of you. You’re the one who has to deal with some dumb whore with a heart-shaped peace sign on her back. 2007 is the year we take back our bodies and stay away from dumb chicks no matter what boner fantasyland they come from.
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Courtesy Touch & Go Record

THE VICE GUIDE TO KILLING YOUR PARENTS - PART 4

A Meatman Weighs In



Tesco Vee of The Meatmen was way, way ahead of the curve on Boomer hating. He wrote the song “1 Down, 3 To Go” about the Beatles way back in ye olden times of 1983.

We asked Tesco to revisit his sentiments about the Fabulously Overrated Four now that it’s 2 Down, 2 To Go…

“Truth be told I was as big a fan of the Fab 4 as the rest of the universe, but when selecting targets for maximum shock value they were an obvious choice. The reaction to Lennon being gunned down and his quick elevation to sainthood belied the years of mediocrity with Sea Hag Ono, and their stinky no bath nude-ins and stints on Mike Douglas. Now 25 years hence I torment the 29 year old who sits behind me at work with a relentless stream of ‘2 down 2 to Go!’ and the visceral reaction remains the same. Just because they were the second greatest pop group of all time—behind ABBA of course—does not absolve them of the guilt and shame that accompanies iconic hero worship and the joy I felt flingin’ that musical cyanide pie in their faces. Still brings a gleam to this ol’ buzzards eye.”

TESCO VEE
Hear the original song here.


THE VICE GUIDE TO KILLING YOUR PARENTS | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 |

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