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 METHTURBATION BLUES
Smoking Tweak Makes My Cock WeakThere is no dignity in what I'm about to share with you. Few things in the world are less classy than smoking crystal meth. Speed is the bastard child of the drug family, cocaine's ugly retarded stepbrother. Like alcohol but unlike almost all other illegal drugs, it causes brain damage. Yet maybe tw...
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  YO GIRL! WHATH UP??
Busting the "Breaking the Seal" MythBusting the "Breaking the Seal" Myth
That "breaking the seal" thing your drunk dad told you about is total bullshit. I tried it. It doesn't matter when you pee. You know what I'm talking about, right? That thing where they say you should hold your first pee in while drinking beer or you'...
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 FARMER HIGH
What Can Adderall Do for Our Country?Adderall is cocaine for rich people. It's an amphetamine more powerful than Ritalin and steadier than speed. It lasts so long, in fact, we recommend breaking open one of the pills Contac C style and only doing small "sprinkles" at a time (break them up with your front teeth to kill the time delay). ...
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 DOS & DON'TS
Could you have more shit hanging off your purse, please? No, I'm serious (you're in the DOs). Having a ton of shit on your face or on some crazy hat is a distracting pain in the ass but when you're dressed in some plain old Joe's Jeans and a shirt your purse is a removable reminder that you could go...
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 BLACKS VS. WHITES
Who Can Drink More?How come black people never get totally shit-faced? White people are always getting so wasted they can barely stand but, outside of bums, you almost never see black dudes slurring their words. Is it because they drink really expensive shit like Courvoisier and Hennessy and to get slur-drunk on that ...
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 SHROOMS REUNION
Twenty Years Later, the Night Remains IntactIt was 1985, Halloween night, and a group of young Canadian suburban teenagers had decided to try magic mushrooms over at Marco's house. They dropped about a gram each into mugs of hot water, covered them with Saran Wrap, waited about 15 minutes, and drank them. The next seven hours fucked them up s...
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 GROSS JAR
Spring has come, and our former rat deficiency has blossomed like a patch of verminous rhododendron into an overwhelming abundance. In addition to the sandwich bag full of feeder rats that was delivered a week too late and packed in blankets rather than dry ice, our office has been blessed by the ap...
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 CUT THE SHIT
How Pure Are Street Drugs?I bought cocaine, heroin, crack, weed, and ecstasy and had them forensically analyzed by a chemist at MIT because I thought they would all turn out to be poison. Guess what? Drug dealers don't cut drugs with cement and ground glass. They barely even cut drugs at all, because they don't need to. Rela...
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 I'M BUSTED
In the netherworld of corruption and violence, convicts live for drama. Dudes in prison are constantly scheming, trying to find a way to come up or a way to tune out and escape the brutal reality of their incarceration. Drugs are usually a means to an end. In federal prison, where more than 50 perce...
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 THE VICE GUIDE TO REHAB
A good rehab is essentially an anarchist socialist commune with one rule: Don't get high. There are no cops, no bureaucrats and no squares hassling you about riding your machine. The people there come from every class and social stratum. There're doctors (I actually referred my own dentist to a reha...
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 IN THE BLOOD
Dealing With Dad's JunkMy father liked heroin. A lot. He liked it so much that I guess one day he went out for a pack of smokes or something and never came back. I swore I would never get into heroin. Until I got into it. A lot.
I'm better now and I'm pretty sure he's better too, but then again he lives in Yellvi...
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 SKINEMA
Hands down, this is the greatest DVD ever made! It is so amazingly retarded that it pushes the boundaries of what is awesome. Like the iPod and the calculator ...
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 GLUE KIDS
Kenyan Orphans Hit the BagFor most of us, getting high is a matter of choice and preference, like, "Hmm, do I want to smoke weed and watch The Incredibles tonight, or would I rather get a bag of coke and go talk shit with my buds?" When your nights are spent sleeping on cold concrete and your whole family is dead or missing,...
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 TIDBITS
A monthly look at things we love - v12n4PORTABLE DOG TOILET
After 60 years of being forced to eat the world's shit for allowing Nazis to flourish, the Germans have gotten pretty used to it. Eighty percent of the world's shit porn comes from that country and nearly every innovation the shit industry has to offer comes from Germ...
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 TOTALLY FUCKED UP
That's What Total Fucking Destruction AreImagine you have an amazing band that does better grindcore than the thousands of little skirts pumping out so-called heavy music nowadays. Now imagine that you record music at an insane rate of speed, no fucking frills, basically so that it sounds like it was done on a boombox in a garage. Then you...
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 FREAK THE FUCK OUT
Sunburned Hand of the Man on a TripVermont's Sunburned Hand of the Man are not fucking hippies. Yes, they come from a hippie state and yes, they are more or less unwashed, but these guys are as far removed from peace and love as the Taliban. At a recent show at New York's Tonic nightclub, they took the stage well past 1 AM, picked up...
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 CRACK TALES
Dipset Knows the DealHell Rell: I just got out of jail for getting caught with 100 grams of crack cocaine. I'm a convicted felon. I have two bid numbers: 02R2050, 97R7193, you bastards. So if you want to talk about drugs, I'll tell you how to cop the coke, cook the coke, chop the coke, bag the coke, and get rid o...
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 GYM MONKEYS
Love SteroidsNewspapers and pro athletes who get busted and then cry shame and say they hate steroids are LIARS.
Steroids rule. Why? I'll tell you fucking why:...
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 I WANT MY DVDS
Low In Europe, Richard Pryor: Live & Smokin', Berlin Super 80: Music & Film Underground West Berlin 1978-1984, Pfadfinderei & Modelselektor: Labland, ...
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 TALIBAN HEROIN
Roll Deep Can Get Rid Of ItWith American troops busy blowing up Afghan weddings based on I.P.L. (Incriminating Pocket Litter–an official excuse given by American Intelligence), an International Narcotics Control Strategy report last year claimed the area of land used to cultivate opium in Afghanistan has reached 30, 750 hecta...
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 ELECTRIC INDEPENDENCE
It's always a treat to hear Aphex Twin DJ, especially in unusual places. He never disappoints. Last month Vice enjoyed watching him thoroughly rinse this packed alpine bar in the Austrian ski resort of Mayerhofen, where the annual Snowbombing festival happpened ("Piste by day, beats by night" is the...
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 GAMES
Midnight Club 3: Dub Edition, The PunisherMidnight Club 3: Dub Edition
Rockstar Games
PS2/Xbox
Growing up in a small town on the borders of Liverpool was boring. If you didn't have a car or a friend with a car, your life was restricted to drinking in the park, sniffing glue and fighting with the same people every w...
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 GRIMEWATCH
Apart from consuming weed intravenously and the very occasional rock, your average grime kid isn't backing as much drugs as generations of ravers from years gone by. ...
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 LEGALLY HIGH
BZP and MeI'd always thought that legal drug alternatives were reserved for underage backpackers with dreadlocks travelling through Amsterdam. Then I moved to New Zealand and realised I was entirely mistaken. Since being introduced five years ago, there has been an enormous explosion of these 'legal' or 'herb...
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 D.I.Y.
Getting Drunk For the LazyParties are only fun when you're drunk. It's sad but true. Everyone basically turns into your worst nightmare but that's ok because so do you. When you're sober, the annoying habits of drunk people are magnified tenfold and you find yourself hating everything you had ever held close. It used to be t...
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 SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW
Is Edan, Is GoodDon't be so smug, Mr.Mathers. Twenty million other white rappers have emerged and they're gunning for your job. The creamiest of the crop is Boston's Edan (pronounced Edon) and he's doing his bit for the cause by delivering some of the most clearly focused and unique hip hop we've heard in ages. His...
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 TRAVELLING THE SPACEWAYS
Om Go With the FlowDriving cross-country with a bunch of mates can be a total prick. Roadhouse, cancer-baiting food, deep vein thrombosis, drunken shenanigans in the back seat and crazed, coffee-fuelled sprints through seas of semi-trailers are all part of the deal. The worst part by far though, are the fights over wh...
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 DOOMS DAY DISCO
Panico are a band from Chile and their debut album, Subliminal Kill (Tigersushi), sounds like they take a lot of psychedelics.
My hunch was right. Last week I spoke to Eduardo from the band and he told me about the time they filmed a TV show on acid. "It was back in the time we lived in Chi...
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 VICE PARTY
We had a party in Lund, Sweden. The High Heeled Honeys played live and Electric Independence's lovely Piers came over to play records with us. Thanks to Bad Taste Records, TT, WE and Stortorget....
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 UNDERAGE DRINKING
Bangkok Cobra Knows All About ItWe first met Bangkok Cobra at their high school when we were scouting for virgins for the Sex Issue fashion story.
The singer, Rikki, started coming by our office to Xerox posters for their shows and gave us their demo. It was recorded over one mic, so it sounded a bit crap, but Rikki sings...
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