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Come to think of it, fuck fashionable, expensive shit. We want tacky crap from Chinatown. You can keep your anorexic Parisians in swishy Prada wear. We want meaty Blasians in corny diva wear.
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How's this for disrespect? Their incredibly overweight, 7 ft. tall mother raises them and does what she can with no father and these little fucking ingrates parade around town in her maternity wear like she was some kind of stupid fat person that should be made fun of. The poor woman is left at home, nude in bed and crying to the ceiling, "Where did I go wrong, lawd?"
[Fuck you, I like it—Ed.] |
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| OK, he may look like an anthropomorphized erection but check out the schnozz. That thing has been broken about a thousand times. And a tattoo of a slut being encircled by shitting penises covered in STDs? If this guy's an erection then stick it on me. I'm going to get laid. |
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"Slappy Tits" here busted her ass all week and now she is here to party. Sure, getting laid wouldn't be horrible. That's what she's got the leather and lace for. But if you look at the shoes and her lack of concern where things end up, you realize that tonight is about the dance floor and dancing the living shit out of yourself. |
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| Look at this dude, all alone doing his little shirky dance. He doesn't give a shit if you think he's weird and he's not here to make any new friends. He's just here to dance around in his pile of homemade clothes and do some new dances he invented. Shy is the new in-your-face. |
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Holy shit could this ball of rice be any more put together? From the embroidered jean jacket right down to the perfectly coordinated fuck me boots, she's so flawless she's basically a logo. |
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| This goes out to the true eccentrics. Not some douche that refuses to buy a CD player or a cell phone—we're talking about an old Italian immigrant who can't resist a few good hauls off her favorite pipe. She could give so little of a shit what her husband thinks she's basically giving a negative shit which is like putting a vacum cleaner to his ass and killing him. |
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Last month we gave old ladies shit for dressing like adolescent whores, but there's nothing wrong with them picking up some 22s and shooting the shit out of a rival hillbilly's home. Women and guns are always good. Even when they're dying. |
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