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You know boning a girl is the right decision when even God's like, "What the fuck are you waiting for? Get in there!" Comments/Enlarge | See all


I wish I could tell you whether or not this Venice Beach Robocop’s legs were going “kzzzzzzzt kzzzzzzzt kzzzzzzzt kzzzzzzzt” with each step, but it was hard to hear over the sound of my mouth going “Haaaaa Haaaa Haaaa Haaaa.” Comments/Enlarge | See all






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ALSO BY RYAN DUFFY

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MUSIC IS BORING
Ben Weasel Talks Baseball

See all articles by this contributor




Photo courtesy of Fat Wreck Chords

MUSIC IS BORING

Ben Weasel Talks Baseball



Screeching Weasel is pretty much the best band ever. Before the “pop punk” label become an insult, it simply meant punk rock written by a slightly more advanced species of miscreant, one with an ear for melody and some vague semblance of songwriting ability. The Weasel were exactly that: beer-drenched troublemakers who just so happened to like Rocket to Russia more than Tied Down. And mercy, did they ever nail it. You listen to this band the same way junior high girls sign eighth grade yearbooks: with unbridled enthusiasm, huge sweeping letters, big toothy smiles, lots of hearts, and yeah—occasionally tears. I’ve even committed to a summer of family BBQs featuring endless “why the fuck do you have a ferret on your leg?” questions from my father and uncles by having the Weasel logo tattooed on the side of my calf.

Talking about music, however, is boring. Even if it’s Screeching Weasel’s music. How about we shut up about whether Boogadaboogadaboogada was a “departure” or “maturation” for the band and just listen to it? It’s a record, you dink: a few chords, some banging, and, if you’re lucky, a good hook or two. Let’s throw it on the stereo, crack a few Buds, and argue about something worth our time: sports.

Vice: So Screeching Weasel has a greatest-hits type thing coming out as well as a bunch of rereleases. For a band that didn’t like touring or even each other, you sure put out a lot of music.

Ben Weasel: I’ve always liked writing songs more than I have playing them. Shows to me were kind of boring: same songs, same crowds. I was more worried about the promoter dicking us out of money. That’s why I was so prolific when I was younger. I kind of thought I had to be that way to maintain whatever it was I had. That concept seems pretty ridiculous as you get older. It’s like an old baseball pitcher who moves to the knuckleball after he loses his fastball. You can’t overwhelm ’em anymore, so you have to be crafty.

Living outside Chicago, I’m guessing you’re a Cubs fan?

Not so much anymore. My wife is from New York, so I’m more or less rooting for the Yankees now.

That sucks.

I was a Cubs fan up until the 2000 season. I was watching a game where Rick Aguilera walked in two or three runs and they lost in the ninth. I just remember looking around and thinking to myself at the time, “I’m really fucking sick of backing losers.” That was that.

RYAN DUFFY
Weaselmania is out now on Fat Wreck Chords. Asian Man are also about to reissue a bunch of Weasel classics.

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