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| Of course, if you get the living shit kicked out of you it's not quite so amazing. You know what? It's probably best to stick to the going-to-fight look and try to avoid the whole just-fought-and-lost look. |
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Ah ha ha ha ha. Look at his fucking tattoos. A belly-button tribal sun (which is essentially saying, "Pay attention to my stomach") and a motherfucking grandfather clock?! What are we, in Turkey? |
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| What is it with Puerto Ricans where they're perpetually 10 years old? Oh yeah, they don't have a dad. |
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Naked ladies are pretty, even to people who aren't sexually attracted to women. However, having a woman spread her gash on your back for the rest of your life is totally fucking insane. How white trash are you? Did you grow up in the garbage? |
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The thing I want to know is, what does this guy think he looks like? Does he see a funky version of Steve Tyler? Does he see an irreverent rocker who does the wango tango?
Give up the bass, dude. You're old. |
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Guy, The Flash was the fastest man alive. You're a fat pig with a faggy dog. Get a shirt with food on it or something. Right now you're a parody of how slow you are. |
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| Don't get me wrong, heroin is great and everything, but what the fuck is the matter with these people? Hey Dorothy, just because you build a living room on a park bench and click your heels three times doesn't mean you're not in the fucking park anymore. You can't just crash. Junkies are the biggest fucking losers in the world. At least drunks say funny shit. |
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| We're not sure what happened to electroclash. Everyone was into it (even us) and then it seemed to morph into a weird kind of drag-queen-talent-show thing, and now look at it. |
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Look at these fucking turds. Could they be bigger pieces of human waste, please? Look at them. They're just two big pieces of genitalia with ridiculous hats on. They're not even worth diarrhea-ing on. |
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| Er, if you're going for "medieval biker punk," you might want to get something a little more substantial than a fucking Vespa. Those are for a type of in-the-closet girly man we call a "mod." When you ride it, you look like elephant Satan going to battle on a tricycle. |
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Shhhhh, don't wake the sleeping Jew. Washing and drying his four-foot-long hair can take all morning, so cut the guy some slack and let him rest. |
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