 WE LOVE YOU
And We Hope You Will Love Oui Too
It all starts with love. Love is a four-letter word. Four is a four-letter word. As Love. As Four. We always say this. We have a list of four-letter words. Hate is a four-letter word too. Fuck. Sexy. Dick. Cats. Dogs. It's our little game. Hello, we are As Fou...READ MORE |
  DEAR DIARY
Entry: December, 1991
December, 1991
Dear Diary,
On Thursday I went to the Thanksgiving Day Parade with Steve, Jamie, and Alex. Boyz II Men KISSED ME! On Friday was the camp reunion and Shari, Marla, Liaht, and Debbie were totally avoiding us. I really used to like...READ MORE |
 OUT OF MY LIPS
Stop Three-Way Kissing Me
Is it safe to say that the three-way kiss is officially the most annoying new phenomenon of the new millennium? Yes, it is.
I just watched the insipid movie Laurel Canyon, featuring another groundbreaking three-way kiss between Frances McDormand, a gu...READ MORE |
 ELECTRIC INDEPENDENCE
My friend Greg is getting married and it's the funniest thing I've ever seen. I like going out with him and his future bride because I know that underneath all the hugs and kisses, he's scared shitless. He's happy to say hello to a new life with his fiancée, b...READ MORE |
 HUGGING IN THE CLOSET
What If These Cuties Hooked Up?
Did you know that in Hollywood, men sometimes hug and kiss other men? I am referring to intimate hugging, where you put your arm around the person and then rub and caress them from the back, and kissing in the French fashion (avec langue). It's a fact. In addi...READ MORE |
 AN ODE TO THE FAT FRIEND
The Mother Teresa of Hooking Up
"To be honest, Kassandra doesn't give a shit about sports or if you know Vincent Gallo," says the fat friend discreetly. "If you want to get her attention just be the fun guy and invite her out to parties and stuff." I love you, fat friend. After abandoning al...READ MORE |
 LITERARY
Book Reviews - The Hugs 'N' Kisses Issue
The Complete Peanuts, Underworld 5: My Little Funny, When We Were Maakies...READ MORE |
 WHO'S CUTER?
White Babies or Black Babies?
That makes a great header and everything, but there's actually way more categories than that. There's "weird-race" babies, which are like Persian, Pakistani, or half Native American and half white, or whatever. Then there's all the Asia countries and...well, t...READ MORE |
 VICE PICTURES
The Hugs 'N' Kisses Issue
Photos by Ryan McGinley
One afternoon in 1997 I was drawing the inside of a church for an art-school assignment. I was never really that good at drawing and I've always loved to cheat, so I got an idea. I went down to the pharmacy and bought a camera. I t...READ MORE |
 ENDLESS LOVE
The Happiest Man in Japan
Hi, my name is Konishi, but I prefer being called 524. I'm 25 years old and I live in Nagano, Japan, which is where the Winter Olympics were held in 1998. For me, Japan is the paradise of otaku, which means "crazy" or "insane."
The girl in the picture...READ MORE |
 POCKETS DUMB FAT
Last month, we lamented the legal troubles of Diddy's other manservant, Prettyboy Loon. But having already rode for Harlemworld with our stink-pink "FREE LOON" tee, it's time to focus our attention on someone who needs it more: Pimp C. For those who think "Big...READ MORE |
 YAY! YOGIS CAN FLY!
I Am a Total Idiot
I am a firm believer in Transcendental Meditation (TM) as taught by Maharishi Mahesh Yogi. I've been doing TM since I was five. I'm also the editor of this magazine. That's not unlike showing up to a KKK rally dressed as Boy George. Due to my beliefs, I am rep...READ MORE |
 SKINEMA
By Chris Nieratko
JAMIACAN ME HORNY
As clever as I feel standing on my coffee table naked and videotaping myself practicing stand-up comedy after a bunch of coke and ten cups of coffee, I realize my wit is sophomoric each and every time I see a clever porn title suc...READ MORE |
 CUTE ATTACK!
Gigantic Rodents Are the Perfect Pet
Chinchillas are widely recognized as the cutest animals in existence. They have big, fluffy ears and are so soft it makes your palm tingle to touch them. They are the Veuve Clicquot not only of the slaughtered-and-butchered-fur-coat world but also of the wiggl...READ MORE |
 TIDBITS
A Monthly Look At Things We Love - The Hugs 'N' Kisses Issue
MAILING CAMERAS
New game alert! The funnest new game in town is called "sending a disposable camera to someone you know or kind of love and having them mail it back to you." If you don't get it back, the person you sent it to is lame and you were s...READ MORE |
 FREEZING IN HELL
Russian Cartoon Cults Alleviate the Suffering
Cheburashka is a cute little animal-half monkey, half bear-from a 70s Soviet TV animation. To understand why this warmhearted, naive little animal and the weekly dance parties named after him are so big with Moscow kids right now, you have to understand a bit ...READ MORE |
 THE VICE GUIDE TO CUTE
The A–Z on Cute
I know that Sanrio and pacifiers are raver garbage. I know that all the twee pop and lovecore bands of the mid-90s are counting spare change for Ramen noodles now-doye-but there's something you should know. Cute is eternally recurring. There will never be a ti...READ MORE |
 BIG WHUP
The Vice Guide to STDs
Oops, you got a little too drunk last night and you did it without a condom. It's the end of the world, right? Now you're pregnant with AIDS and you're going to have festering sores on your body forever. Maybe you should go to the doctor now and start crying a...READ MORE |
 THE VICE GUIDE TO FRIENDSHIP
Want to know about all the different kinds of friends? Welcome to the Friendship Forest. It can be a treacherous place, but its rewards are warmth, hugs, understanding, and chuckles. The ultimate goal is finding your BFF, but you'll really have to do some spel...READ MORE |
 THE BETA BAND ARE BACK
And They're Still Broke
When the Beta Band put out their amazing first three EPs back in 1998, it seemed like they were about to blow bullshit Britpop to pieces and create a musical revolution that would engulf the world and usher in a new age of psychedelia and love. All the care an...READ MORE |
 MARMALADE SWIRLS
Getting Lost in Psychedelic Folk
Back in the early 1990s, when grunge was fading away and boy bands were cramming into the golden elevator, recent college graduate Pat Gubler helped start a band called Tower Recordings. Pat and cofounders Matt Valentine and his wife Helen Rush all lived toget...READ MORE |
 I HATE GOD
But I Love Outlaw Order
There is no cuter guy than a dirty metal-punk dude from the South with a fuck-off attitude and one of those sinewy, muscle-y white-trash bodies. They make every other man look like a total gay person. When they kiss you, it's like having a live electrical cabl...READ MORE |
 HATE RAP?
Ill Bill's Uncle Changed His Mind
Is it such a surprise that Brooklyn's most disturbing brutality rapper is responsible for a heartrending New York story of redemption? Is it so hard to believe that the paranoid psycho rap star Ill Bill-he of the alarmist Illuminati rhymes-opened his heart and...READ MORE |
 HUGGY BARR
Cutesy Indie Rap From Coast to Coast
BARR is this kid Brendan Fowler from Baltimore via New York, but he lives in Los Angeles, which is where he belongs. Not because L.A. is full of bronzed robots who won't hug you unless you make at least $300K a minute, but because L.A. is always sunny and so i...READ MORE |
 FUCK THE WORLD
Love Is All Live Too Far Away
Can somebody please outlaw transatlantic long-distance relationships? My BFF's boy lives in LA and she lives in London and they're both going totally fucking crazy. Here's why:
1. Not only is paranoia eating them alive, they're also falling out over t...READ MORE |
 BEATS AND RHYMES
We've got love and hugs and kisses in spades for Rephlex Records but what the fuck are they doing releasing that Grime compilation? Talk about a misnomer. Do they really know about the most exciting/violent/retarded musical movement this country has seen since...READ MORE |
 NAH TO GALS
Tinchy Strider Don't Care
Even though East London branches of Domino'S pizza had a record number of delivery orders on Valentine's day, the scaredy cat management told all their workers that no delivery men could go anywhere near the tower blocks of Bow for fear of them getting mugged....READ MORE |
 GAMES
Red Dead Revolver
RED DEAD REVOLVER
We all love Ennio Morricone right? But can anybody really put their hand on their heart and say they've watched ANY spaghetti western more than twice in their whole lives?
Unless you live in one of those space/time continuu...READ MORE |
 OH THE PAIN
Xiu Xiu Break My Heart Every Time
I recently gave my friend a copy of Xiu Xiu's new album and he almost killed himself. I couldn't tell whether it was because the album is completely amazing and he realized he'd never be as talented as them, or because he'd just been dumped by his longtime gir...READ MORE |
 FUGGIN EH
Death From Above Party Well
Dudes. Do you fucking even realise that if it hadn't been for partying and booze, the two guys from Death From Above would probably never have met!
And do you know that means the band wouldn't exist and none of their songs would ever have been written...READ MORE |
 UNDERGROUND LOVERS
My Disco are Having the Time of Your Life
My Disco make little electroclash glam boys wilt like a penis on shitty coke. Not only did they steal their name from Big Black, they took their true-til-death attitude from Señor Albini as well. They sound like the contents of a toolbox started a band: abrasi...READ MORE |
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