 LET IT OUT
Barfers are the New RomansUsed to be the only people obsessed with barfing were "fat" Canadian white girls with nothing better to do than worry their parents. Then we came along. We are the Barfers and we barf way more than any teenage girl could ever dream of. Why, just last night I was removed from a bar called Barrymore's...
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  BEATS AND RHYMES
Fritz le Chat's Sixth Annual Rap Awards
SHIT THAT RULED IN 2003
Paris came back to the game, dope 80s fashion, facial hair (men only), quitting your major-label A&R job to be a broke-ass writer/musician/actor/bartender, Ludacris, cocaine, the Southern invasion, Dirty out ...
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 THE ME MEN
Self-Obsession Reaches WTF? ProportionsWhat the fuck are longhairs, you ask? Longhairs are a bunch of self-obsessed idiots who passionately grow their hair long and talk about it online. They have the same fervor and intensity as pot-growers or activists, only instead of doing any good for the world, these closeted homos (lawyer's note: ...
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 DEAR DIARY
Entry: December 1994December 1994
Dear Diary,
Just got back from Fugazi. Saw Cliff. Saw John. Saw Tyler. Talked to Bobby a lot. Saw Antonio. Antonio...his name just rolls off my tongue like Italian ices in 90-degree heat. Too bad his personality isn't so hot. Ha ha. Brad Faryll=gross (and hot). ...
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 PUKING UP BULLSHIT
The Media's Obsession with ObsessionsThe best art to come out of Mexico never actually existed. It was poignant and beautiful and provided heavy social commentary. It was everything good art should be, and the media was so excited to find it they never bothered to check if it was really there....
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 I WANT MY DVDS
Can, Duran Duran Greatest: the DVD, Pink Floyd: the Dark Side of the Moon...
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 BUMFIGHTS TO SURVIVE
Lizzie McGuire Teaches a Valuable LessonHey, did you ever see Bumfights? It's fucking funny, man. They get all these bums to do funny shit for money and they get all gnarly and wasted and shit. One piece of human garbage even got "Bumfights" tattooed across his forehead. Ha ha. I love that shit. So when the people at Visa offered me these...
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 ELECTRIC INDEPENDENCE
My part-time-MC/stylist roommate, Miss Matches, has OCD. We like to bring it up at parties and people usually laugh and talk shit, but if these same people were getting five calls a day asking if they left the oven/curling iron/candles on, they wouldn't be laughing so hard. This person is cripplingl...
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 GOREFEST 2004
Stitching Together Cinema's Harshest Moments" All you can do is cling to your obsessions.... Construct your own personal mythology out of them.... Follow those obsessions like stepping stones in front of a sleepwalker.... [Because] if you compromise with your own obsessions, that way lies disaster."
–J.G. Ballard ...
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 VICE FASHION - TANOREXICS
The American Cancer Society says that between 1996 and 2003, the use of tanning salons by people under age 25 more than tripled. The American Cancer Society cares about this because (doye) excessive tanning causes skin cancer. When you get skin cancer they have to cut entire chunks off of you. Is yo...
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 SHUT UP YOU FUCKING BABY
You're Obsessing Over NothingWhy should you care that Harmony Korine did a documentary about another one of David Blaine's look-at-me stunts? So what if a megalomaniac magician locked himself in a tiny glass box for 44 days and called it performance art? After all, isn't David Blaine that creepy pervert famous for running back ...
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 ITALLION STALLION
Scary Perry at Jeremy Scott's Porno Fashion ShowAnybody who knows me can tell you that I'm a tit man. Tits, tits, tits, I love tits. All kinds of tits. So when Don Barris (one of my costars from Windy City Heat) called me up out of nowhere and told me Vice wanted The Big Three to cover a fashion show, I immediately knew that it would be a good ch...
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 SKINEMA
White hip-hop multitasker (MC, producer, video director, comedian, etc.) Necro has added another title to his résumé––porn director. ...
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 I'M GOING TO GRACELAND TOO!
The Endless Quest for Everything ElvisI know you went to school with a guy that was "totally into Bowie," and there's a 40-year-old in your hometown who hasn't outgrown his Church of the Subgenius phase, but that's preschool stuff. The Dalai Lama? The Pope? Aimless rookies. Even outsider godheads like Howard Finster and Henry Darger loo...
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 TIDBITS
A monthly look at things we love - v11n1TIDIBITS (SPECIAL EDITION: AIRPLANE CUTLERY)
1. ANA (Japan)
Thanks to some dickweed named Allah and all his gay friends, you don't get cutlery on planes anymore. Now you just get some shitty turkey wrap that you have to eat with your hands. ...
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 THE HUMAN ASHTRAY
And the Closeted Gays That Loved HimIn 1955, when my uncle Larry was in the EIGHth grade, he saw Rebel Without a Cause. From there on out, he was totally obsessed. After graduating from high school, Larry was so focused on his perverted gay hero that he was spending more than all his money on collectible junk and was forced to live in...
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 HOLLAAAAA!
America's Race Obsession Rages OnYo, don't know if y'all niggas heard 'bout this but this white dude in Florida recently wrote this fucked-up fuckin' review of a hip-hop show, talkin' bout, talkin' bout, talkin' bout how fucked-up the show was and shit. Nigga didn't write it like a white dude, though. He did it all street 'n' shit,...
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 CAN'T STOP
How to Harness the Power of the Mentally Ill"If it weren't for us Aspies, all you NTs would still be in caves." Aspies are people with Asperger's Syndrome, a mental disorder that allows its victims to concentrate on one thing, exclusively, forever and ever, hence important technological inventions like the phone and the car. NTs, on the other...
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 NO WAR FOR HEAVY METAL!
A.Crassicauda Is Baghdad's HardestMOST PEOPLE IN BAGHDAD DON'T LEAVE THEIR HOUSES at night. They don't rent movies. They don't go to bars. Mostly, they sit huddled in dingy shacks and wait and watch and hope that the occupying army will lift its curfew and everything will become safe enough for them to go outside one day. Fat chance...
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 THE RUNAWAYS
Iranian Punks From Bullets to GuitarsWhen Omid Yamini was a boy, the Iran-Iraq war was at its peak. His family had a lot of weapons in the house, including an Uzi and several machine guns, and they were always readily available. This was in Iran in the late 70s, and if you were a preadolescent kid the only thing to do for fun was colle...
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 HOMOSAPIENS TOO
Early Man Get Schooled by a DickheadThe earliest caveman (hominid) fossils were found in Aramis, Ethiopia, in 1994. The people who found them dated them back to 4.4 million B.C., but after looking at them more closely they found out the fossils were actually from 5.8 million B.C. That's 1.4 million years older than they were originall...
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 TOKYO TRIPPING
Ghost Make Americans Look Like Crazy NipsThe Japanese are so busy freaking out over our shit they almost forgot to come up with any new shit of their own. From Tokyo's Gunguro girls with their fake tans, bleached hair, and California dreams to the bukkake perverts with their plates of cum and German porn proclivities, it seems any Japanese...
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 BLACK AND WHITE RAPPERS
Benzino's Obsession with Eminem"Never date a Black girl cuz Black girls only want your money."
–Eminem
Don't you find it strange that Eminem's been walking around with a doo rag for over five years now and no one's said anything? Well actually, over a year ago, Ray Benzino, owner of The Source, released two freestyl...
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 BLACK POWER
The Real Heat Take Crowbars to Gay BarsThe Real Heat are three black teen/early 20s singer sisters from Brixton who swear they write and produce all their own music. I dunno, people are saying that Richard X and Mark Moore from S'Express have got something to do with them as well but I don't really care. I hate it when people get obsesse...
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 I HEART ME
Luke Eargoggle Loves EverythingWhen Vice first witnessed the Luke Eargoggle electro love explosion at a packed party in an Antwerp squat last summer, we thought we'd died and gone to some celestial rave where the girls can't stop smiling and everyone wears flowers in their hair. As Luke and his fellow Gothenburg pal Rutherford pe...
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 GAMES
Mission Impossible StealthMission Impossible Stealth
Publisher: Atari
Developer: Paradigm
Platform: PS2
Genre: Stealth...
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 MUSCLE MANIA
This Bodybuilder is Better Than You AreVICE: You look amazing! How long did it take to get this way?
Female bodybuilder: 12 weeks of heavy training.
What did you have to do?
A lot. In that photo, I am completely dehydrated and malnourished. You can't eat or drink for forty hours before competing. ...
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 VICE FASHION - CHRISTIAN GOTHIC
Did you know that there's an entire scene of goth Christian kids? They have nightclubs and bands and websites, and their parents fucking hate them. The Christian parents hate them for looking so stupid, and the goth parents hate them for selling out. It's a lonely life, and it's exactly what they de...
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 INDECENT OBSESSIONS
Cut Copy Can't Stop The ProphetBy the time you get to this, you would have already read about how fucking eighties Cut Copy try to be. Don't buy it for a second, Cut Copy may rock a Prophet but they don't always obsess over the eighties.
Signed to Australia's forward thinking Modular Recordings, Cut Copy are a Melbourne ...
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