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When you are an ice cream cone hanging out with a superhero called Blackman at your party, the onus is no longer on you to worry about how things are going. You did it. Pat yourself on the back.
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Seeing a girl with a big cartoon ice cream on her front can make you pretty hungry, but when it's on a girl whose front tastes like ice cream, you basically need a jaw wire to keep your tongue from rolling across the floor. Comments/Enlarge | See all







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JEFF SOMETHING
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I have no problem with back pieces, shit, I have a skull jellyfish eating Chiang Kai-Shek and Fidel Castro. But an ass piece? You had a man lean into your crack and etch delicate finger waves on your behind? That’s not a tattoo; that’s foreplay.Comments/Enlarge | See all







When we first heard the incredible new album by this French duo called M83, we were all sat in the office in London and people started saying stuff like: “Wow it’s like an ethereal electronic version of My Bloody Valentine” and “It’s like the album Air should have made instead of that last piece of shit they did about the horse” and “this bit sounds like a Goblin soundtrack”, “wow, you’re right this is fucking amazing.”

It was all pretty standard record shop chat until that genius Erik Lavoie dropped by to pay us a visit and he said: “This is m83 right? Anthony and Nicolas from Antibes? Yeah, they’re both totally nice guys and I love the way they’re named after a beautiful distant galaxy with well defined spiral arms which display a very dynamic appearance when viewed through my special space telescope.”

And we were all like. Wow. Is there anything this guy doesn’t know? But then he went on: “That’s right, M83 was discovered in 1751 by Abbe Nicholas Louis de la Caille and if you see an image of it there’s red knots which represent diffusing gaseous nebulae in which star formation is just taking place, and which are excited to shine by its very hot young stars.

“There are also blue regions which represent young stellar populations which have formed, probably some million or some dozens of million years ago. Of all the distant galaxies, I’d have to say that M83 is definitely one of the prettiest.”

Shortly after he’d dropped this bomb, Erik had to leave the office to help out a veterinarian surgeon friend of his with a difficult, life-saving operation on a cute kitten, but not before recommending that the best way to listen to the record was to “close your eyes and imagine the vast, beautiful universe engulfing your every sense. That way you can truly appreciate the fragile beauty that lies at its core.”

JEFF SOMETHING
Dead Cities, Red Seas & Lost Ghosts is released on August 25 through Goom Disques / Labels)

M83 on Erik Lavoie: “C’est magnifique.”

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