BRING IT ON!Cheerleaders Catch a Faceful of Cum
A wicka-wicka scratch gives way to a heavy-ass hip hop break, which in turn is joined by the theme from I Dream Of Jeannie. Another succession of cuts and Michael Jackson’s “Billie Jean” melds flawlessly with EMF’s “Unbelievable” and a certain Missy tune about getting your freak on before a porno-style Miami bass track kicks in with Martin Luther King and Austin Powers trading lines over the top. Another daring bootleg mix made by someone in their bedroom for their friends? An edgy fashionista-night retro-soundtrack being mixed live on a G4? No way!! The Lakeview Tech Centurions are up 86-82 after three quarters and it’s time to get the team PUMPED!!!!!
While white San Francisco nerds and British bootleggers walk around acting like they’re running things, custom-designed megamixes for cheerleading squads have long defined the term “mash-up.” And unlike more cerebral fakers, it ain’t about being clever or referencing the hippest stuff. It’s about three things: getting the crowd psyched, getting the players charged, and JUST GOING FOR IT—120 PERCENT!!!!!!!!
Well, that, and maybe throwing in a few subliminal “Don’t Drink and Drive” messages.
If cheerleaders are going to do all this in just under three minutes, they can’t exactly rely on some extended version of “Vogue” to power their routines. Today’s amped-up arena crowds demand stimulation, and if that means cutting from Aaliyah straight into that “I get knocked down...” song from Chumbawumba, so be it. If it means looping Jar Jar Binks over “Getting Jiggy With It” or laying Chuck D over House of Pain, then that’s what’s gonna happen. Sure, you can laugh, but you haven’t lived until you’ve heard Snap’s “The Power” synched with “Backstreet’s Back.” It goes beyond pop. It goes beyond sports. It goes way beyond Kid 606’s wildest wet dreams and takes you somewhere you’ve never been before: 200 PERCENT PURE ADRENALINE!
OL’ CURLY
Type “cheerleading” into your favorite file-sharing program and you’ll be bombarded by bad porn and quality megamixes. For the more respectable but lamer side of things, check the U.S. “pro”-cheerleading mix sites, like cheerleadingmusic.com, powermusic.com and cheerleading-cheers.com.
See all articles by this contributor Anonymous, on Dec 16, 2008 wrote:
where’s the chicks taking cum????? this magazine has gone soft. fuck this
| | Anonymous, on Nov 12, 2008 wrote:
i will yeah, thank you for all of this vice i will surely put this to good use someday.............. | | Anonymous, on Oct 28, 2008 wrote:
what the fuck is this? | | |
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