ARTICLES BY BOBBY
|
 BARREL BURNERS
One UK Town's Insanely Dangerous TraditionVice: Um, what the fuck are these guys doing?
James Pearson-Howes: It's called Tar Barrels and it happens every year on November fifth. The local townsfolk take turns running through the packed streets with burning...
|
|
|
  HOME SURGERY PARTY
How to Operate on Your GuestsDoctors are boring. They don't have borders, true, but they also don't have any fucking clue what is going on. Doctors Without Remedies, they ought to be called. Who are they anyway? Do they just make up this shit? Like, take that hammer thing they do when they hit you on the knee and say, "Good ref...
|
|
|
 CAN'T STOP
How to Harness the Power of the Mentally Ill"If it weren't for us Aspies, all you NTs would still be in caves." Aspies are people with Asperger's Syndrome, a mental disorder that allows its victims to concentrate on one thing, exclusively, forever and ever, hence important technological inventions like the phone and the car. NTs, on the other...
|
|
|
 OUR TEN FAVORITE PSYCHOPATHS
Life in the Mental-Health Unit Is Fun as HellYou get to meet a lot of fucking psychopaths when working in the mental-health unit of an East Coast maximum-security prison. All of the inmates I worked with were post-trial (already sentenced). Some were permanently in the mental health unit because they were found Guilty but Mentally Ill (which i...
|
|
|
 JUVENILE HELL
Feeling Bad About the Past? Invent a Little.Next time one of your friends says to you, "Why do I keep dating assholes?" you can tell her, "Your dad was a huge asshole who was incapable of showing love. You keep dating these douche bags hoping that you can make them love you, thus repairing the lifelong wound your father inflicted upon you." T...
|
|
|
|
|
| |
