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Fox "Aha, I am about to tell a joke. Here comes the joke. We lied. Ahahahahaha. Did you hear the joke I just told. That was good, no? Very , very funny. I have more jokes if you like." 12 years old Albanian-Canadians should not be allowed to use the internet. Subject: yeah Date: Mar 29 2006 11:31:53 AM Author: Kiel Vice dolls do suck. Subject: fuck you guys Date: Mar 22 2006 10:41:37 AM Author: reno i still havent gotten this issue, fuck all you Subject: geni!!! Date: Mar 22 2006 09:09:45 AM Author: tommy siete dei geni!!! davvero siete l'unico tipo di media che entra regolarmente nella mia via. magari mi sbaglio e siete solo teste di cazzo. pero fate ridere!! per favore mandatemi il numero con la copertina a barboncino floreale, č l'unico che mi manca!! Subject: "LIES" Date: Mar 20 2006 11:49:49 AM Author: verdad Was it really necessary to put the word LIES over each article top and change the issues name to LIES. I know everyone isn't up on latin, but is any one really kicking them self now for being fooled? Subject: "posting a comment" Date: Mar 13 2006 07:20:16 PM Author: douglas daniel clark last issue great,cant put down,just cant. so when is "the bicycle"issue due out? (i mean where you guys devote the whole thing to bikes) Subject: vice dolls are gay Date: Mar 11 2006 09:03:52 PM Author: vice dolls are gay Vice dolls are gay Subject: you wastemans Date: Mar 10 2006 11:34:49 AM Author: Showerman your magazine sucks, bunch of cunts who don't know shit and that prancehall is a cunt who looks like chicken little. he was probably bullied at school too...... Subject: Philosophy Date: Mar 08 2006 04:27:45 AM Author: Phil Is it possible to be a hipster? I don't see how that one works. BTW - hipster is an anagram of retard bus Subject: props Date: Mar 07 2006 05:06:46 PM Author: J One of my mates had this magazine at school and i was attracted by the cover picture he said take a look and now i wanna gte my own copy. good magazine WELL DONE. good photography and very thought provoking Subject: Re: A.C. Date: Mar 07 2006 11:16:17 AM Author: Just sharted meself That is the best news I have heard in a while...the existence of the 'hipster' or 'indie' crowd is no longer amusing as it is apparent that they completely live off the trust funds their wealthy parents provide them with. I wonder how cute all those hipsters use to look in their boarding school outfits before they discovered weed their senior year of high school......you guys are fooling nobody, you can't pay rent as a gallery intern or pushing abstract art. See you guys at the country club! Oi Subject: Oh "extra, extra" bitches Date: Mar 06 2006 07:00:57 PM Author: A.C. Oh my God, d'ya hear? CNN Breaking News: Williamsburg, Brooklyn just died. Many thousand of blacks and latinos rose up and slaughtered the white and asian privileged-class slackers -enabling rent to plummet to reasonable prices and cafes and french bistros to decrease by 300%. Many fires were set in which trillions of pieces of art were destroyed. Investigators put the total value of the artwork at about 10 dollars. A small mass of hipsters fled the mayhem and headed south to Fort Greene. Once there they reportedly could not understand what seemed to be local residents coming home from "work". Subject: Cnuting ccoks Date: Mar 06 2006 06:49:18 PM Author: Jeremy O\o\O\o\O\o'Wolvgang Fuck all of you. Just fuck you. Fuck you for your mediocrity. Fuck you for not caring - and especially fuck fucking you you cuntfaces for pretending to care. You obscene fucking cock-suckers. You will be the first to go. As for vice and the people that people it, well, hmmm ... okay, fuck %99.9% of you. Just kidding. I want you never to have exis- hey, wait, less of this negative shit. Will you publish me now? Job? Maybe? Skills... ummm... internet? excellent auto-sexual skills. mmm. Social. Ish. And I really care about stuff. I mean, I care about shit. If I'm chewing the fat with my brothers, I'm, like, the one that comes in sticking up for the little guy. I'm a big fan of the little guy. Hate to see him rubbed up the wrong way. Depending on what colour he is. Yellow, brown - not so good. Pink - thumbs up!! Blue, think you're in the desert. Blue This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. I'm over.This is so dull. Subject: My issue Date: Mar 06 2006 05:44:44 PM Author: Julia Delcomyn I stopped receiving my issue and I was wondering where it was at. Subject: object Date: Mar 06 2006 05:24:44 PM Author: blame Not for nothing, but if you're going to make an entire issue of sarcastic "articles" - ya might want to check out these guys; http://www.theonion.com/content/index Yeah they're good, huh? But hey, you guys have that gross jar thing, so..you know, that's original. Subject: DD Date: Mar 06 2006 07:18:35 AM Author: B==3 Let's talk some more about these Turtleheads. I tried to talk about them before, but I got censored. That made me angry. And anger makes me violant. It was a really lovely posting, where I meditated upon the various turtle-scarves, and how they'd look on the naked chalet-ladies in my retreat at Lake Tahoe, and also hanging down my naked, hairy chest and perking up on my happy li'l pinky, all perked and pinked at how pristine these things really are. To be honest, I was actually more into just thinking about the little trooper than either the ladies or the turtle-scarves - but anyway, if you have any questions, please don't hesitate to contact Liza & Raemar at www.allaycalifornia.com or www.myspace.com/allaycalifornia. Thanks for your time. Subject: <3 Date: Mar 05 2006 10:44:59 AM Author: me thank you vice, for weeding out some of the gullible fags that read your magazine Subject: stop doing so much coke Date: Mar 03 2006 09:42:07 AM Author: get off your ass vice get off your fucking ass and get the new issue up you trust-fund bastards. Subject: lesbian seagull vs. Date: Mar 02 2006 09:08:48 PM Author: multicultural conglomoration turtlescarves! (u cant make this shit up) Subject: Weak Hoaxes Date: Mar 02 2006 10:19:50 AM Author: Death Charon Why doesn't Vice step it up like Rad Company and do real hoax like the one on Limozeenz. These guys claimed to have stolen all these indie bands gear and took heat for it. http://www.radcompany.net/Storys/NewsStorys/Limozeenz/Li mozeenz.html If your going to be fake, at least go all the way. Once you go hoax, the sky is the limit, and it just shows how weak their writers are. The shit in this issue is just boring. I'll read the next one though. Subject: cont. Date: Mar 02 2006 04:58:22 AM Author: cool It's all just propaganda. And they don't care about you, they only care about their own 'people'. Subject: get it. Date: Mar 02 2006 04:56:40 AM Author: cool So what's the point of making an issue where most of the stuff is made up, remade, photoshopped and so on??? Well, this is what most media does all the time. The media in US and Europe is owned by a certain group of extreme people from a certain group - of a specefic ethnicity. All they do is manipulate, lie, and exagerate + choose what news, movies... you watch every day. So I think the people at vice might be trying to tell you guys -> all media has an agenda + an owner who pushes that agenda. Also if you own enough media, you can controll the government+ laws (to get the people to wote on you, if you're a politician, you need the media on your side, not to loose your job). So who owns the media? What is their agenda? Why this need to controll the people, why all these lies? One obvious agenda is multiculturalism. How can you trust this media, can you be sure the new york times isn't lying to you? Well they are. Time to wake up folks. Subject: links Date: Mar 01 2006 02:22:33 PM Author: o~ wine_maker's song links update that is funniest ever.......sh*t must be very painful too. Subject: NEW ISSSUE Date: Mar 01 2006 08:25:46 AM Author: DC yo vice its fuckin march 1, wheres the new issue? Subject: I liked the UK Issue Date: Feb 28 2006 12:16:58 PM Author: Me and this one sucks beyond belief. Any chance we could switch-up the writers? Subject: insider art Date: Feb 27 2006 08:07:04 AM Author: Flexy Where is it? i dont know how to find things? question mark? But seriously how do we find more from that letter on the "sexually dangerous" chick's pictures and stuff? Subject: TurtleScarf/T-Shirterchiefs Date: Feb 26 2006 06:39:31 AM Author: Biz Op kjhgjk fuckin censoring machine Subject: VERDAD Date: Feb 25 2006 10:52:23 PM Author: name what does verdad mean? Subject: TurtleScarf/T-Shirterchiefs Date: Feb 25 2006 02:17:34 PM Author: Allay California, LLC Hello, A friend of ours directed us to a recent issue of Vice Magazine. We were delighted to find out a new trend of wearing "T-Shirterchiefs." (http://www.viceland.com/ca/v13n2/htdocs/fashion.php) Exciting! We have a similar product as well called the "TurtleScarf" which is pending patent. We were an exhibitor at the MAGIC tradeshow in Las Vegas. Feel free to check us out at www.allaycalifornia.com or www.myspace.com/allaycalifornia. Thanks for your time. Best, Liza & Raemar Subject: GIRLFIGHT Date: Feb 23 2006 11:03:44 AM Author: CEDRIA LALA BITCH FUCK U IT WASNT EITHER BAD SAY IT AGAIN ILL BEAT UR ASS Subject: Stoopid Date: Feb 22 2006 01:18:35 PM Author: LaLa Yup - this issue sucks. All made up - what's the point of this magazine anymore? I am bored of it. Time for something new. Subject: Canada responds to Burt Date: Feb 22 2006 08:13:42 AM Author: J-Rad In my expierience, assholes named burt almost always exaggerate their sexual activity. The fact that you're convinced you're going to suck some teenaged pussy at school...and get head...and fuck some tiny titty at home...and then fuck your wife(who probably doesn't exist)leads me to assume that you may have had sex once in your life... maybe twice. So here's what i think. I think you're some pathetic loser of a teenaged boy who just recently discovered porn OR you're a middle aged sexual predator with a sick obsession with teeny twat. So, on behalf of every man, woman and child in Canada; stay in Fenkirk-you're sick. I'd rather have a country full of fags than pieces of shit like you. Subject: Raymond's face Date: Feb 22 2006 05:06:14 AM Author: Hubert Ohhhhh no...I just jizzed again on the head of my little sambo doll called raymond. Once on the top of the head (where he has a cute little afro) and once on the facial part. In the morning, I'll have to take him to the cleaners but hide it in a bag so no-one see's raymond's jizzy face. Subject: All Canadians are gay Date: Feb 22 2006 05:00:54 AM Author: Burt Because all of your men are a genetically homosexual race (like the English) - you therefore are inferior and don't suck pussy everyday like we do here in Fenkirk. Today, alone, i will most likely suck 2-3 16 yr. old pussy at school, have at least 2 blow job, and will fuck normal twice at night with 15 yr. old girls and maybe a fuck for my wife as well. Unlike in United States, age of consent in Fenkirk is 13 (like in Spain!). Subject: vice in china Date: Feb 21 2006 11:58:38 PM Author: r e d i have that glasses - - on my face too since i was born. ^ ^ Subject: CPH Date: Feb 21 2006 01:37:45 PM Author: punisher jesus have you checked those bitches in CPH out - our girls are dirt here in london compared to that shit!!! Subject: say whizzat? Date: Feb 20 2006 09:47:13 PM Author: doctor pink i guess there is some competiztion goin' dizzown? i aint no punk, bitch! smooches. doctor pink p.s. put this in Vice, too. it'll be good. trust me. if it's about "darn"... you know the rest. AWESOME! Subject: look! what grace he exhibits! Date: Feb 20 2006 09:45:33 PM Author: diesel now that is class... tip of the cap to you, "darn" your sycophant bitch, diesel Subject: wow. Date: Feb 20 2006 09:39:52 PM Author: darn you guys are nice. thanks. darn Subject: "darn", that doctor pink is right-on! Date: Feb 20 2006 09:32:39 PM Author: diesel i was just about to post something which was basically to the same effect as that of doctor pink, save the jivery and boasting, but chalk full of kudos and musings for and about this most treasured, and assuredly brilliant person. tally-ho!, "darn" your overt adrmirer, diesel Subject: look at my pants the cost $400 Im cool Date: Feb 20 2006 09:35:29 PM Author: just not worth it what i want to know is seeing as your such fucking pop trash will you suck my dick for 10 bucks? It really is a shame the do's and dont's have turned into such a crock. Much like the rest of the content really, your just forcing it a bit and if your forcing to hard all you going to do is shit yourself and blow a blood vien in your eye. The chewing out you had comming to you has turned up, and with luck its got Jaws proportions. you set yourself up as untouchable uber hip and you will be cut down. tall popies that you are people want to see you fail. Dont feel bad, its just trends, vice is a trend. Years ago you were cool, you got popular, you got merchandice and rest if the bling and the hollow/rich sold out feeling. People will now reject you and move on but vice will be reborn in a Kyle Minogue make up and implants kinda way every 5-8 years. You are pop culture. doesnt it turn you on. Im touching myself right now. Subject: throw this in the next vice issue... Date: Feb 20 2006 09:15:21 PM Author: doctor pink as an avid vice reader and cool mutha fucka, yes, i think that "darn" is right about bustas dissin on the set in dey own hood. also, i think it should become a major "do" for people to suggest what they think a "do" should be, i.e. what "darn" said earlier. i guess this "darn" guy will be beneath this posting, but hey, i wish his could be above mine, as clizearly, it belongs there. word. you guys should write a story about that "darn" guy. i bet he would do something cool. i guess what im trying to say here is that i am going to watch out for an enitre "darn" issue. smooches, doctor pink Subject: i hate people that complain about vice. Date: Feb 20 2006 09:09:02 PM Author: darn i do. i really, really do hate people who complain about vice on the vice website. now, this complaining that i am doing, that is cool to do on the vice webste. i would wager it will become, or probably already is a major "do". my noble modesty is totally wasted on those jive-ass turkeys. i totally lack the emoticon for something like this. :( Subject: blue eyed Date: Feb 20 2006 07:49:17 AM Author: paul_kelp guess i was kinda blue eyed when i thought parts of the articles in the verdad issue actually had true content. liked your zine a lot. never read much of the texts though. wonīt do it again. Subject: not fanny, not fanny...hihihi Date: Feb 17 2006 07:31:22 AM Author: clichenda cliche vice once again with the renegade master... que pega... no hay nada peor que una revista que trata de ser, pero no le sale.... terrorism..oohhhh edgy...... drugs.....thats always a winner..... BORING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! not even the donīts r fanny.... Subject: Re: BMX !!! Date: Feb 17 2006 02:14:03 AM Author: peter jackson Ruben, is this you?? Subject: gettin stoned on stones Date: Feb 16 2006 11:56:47 PM Author: radar are those rocks real and if so can someone contact me with info on how to get some hallucinogenic volcanic rocks please stuntguy@canada.com Subject: BMX !!! Date: Feb 15 2006 01:12:07 PM Author: ruben alcantara BMX in the cover of vice !! awesome !!!! Subject: fuck vice Date: Feb 15 2006 11:54:58 AM Author: punisher i just want to destroy everything Subject: Vice Date: Feb 14 2006 09:54:11 AM Author: Anton vice has been a good read in the past and i must say still is most of the time. but occasionaly i get an issue that just pisses me off because its full of shit that doesn't make me laugh, all good things come to an end. is VICE? what the ferk are you going to do to keep this mag kicking arse? Subject: pfft Date: Feb 13 2006 10:23:40 AM Author: dork Proxima Centauri is the nearest star to earth and it is over 4 million light years away. The prescence of a galaxy at 2 million light years would create tidal forces which would alter our galactic morphology and cause the Milky Way to milk its own dick.... Subject: onion Date: Feb 13 2006 01:27:08 AM Author: max is vice 'the onion' now? Subject: the brilliance of this issue... Date: Feb 12 2006 09:12:34 PM Author: Mike Hell yet another issue designed to solicit some of the most moronic comments possible from your readers. well done! could a feedback issue be too far off? Subject: Verdad Date: Feb 12 2006 10:17:10 AM Author: Skillet This issue is > than the world weekly news or any other tabloid Subject: music reviews Date: Feb 12 2006 05:05:06 AM Author: Stankey Yay for music reviews! Subject: vice Date: Feb 11 2006 05:27:03 PM Author: - better than the last issue...should stil be better though Subject: 1 Date: Feb 10 2006 04:10:17 PM Author: 1 he's using a dictionary to read the lies. Subject: Espaņol Date: Feb 10 2006 10:05:50 AM Author: Jamie Mentira Hubiera sido mas divertido que publicaran todo en espaņol. Todos con diccionarios tratando de leer todas estas mentiras. BUMMER!!! Subject: NY Times? Date: Feb 09 2006 11:07:13 PM Author: Anon. Is this suppose to be a mockery of the NY Times? Subject: crafty Date: Feb 09 2006 01:11:32 PM Author: you know who that was great. it's hard to read through a whole booring article once you figure out whats going on. parts of it were good though. love the galaxy thing. reading peoples frustrated comments was hilarious. Subject: Issue theme Date: Feb 09 2006 07:59:52 AM Author: D The worst issue of all time was cool, but this is just a little annoying. Why have a theme that just involves making shit up? Subject: this ish' Date: Feb 09 2006 07:20:48 AM Author: Dude This issue feels like one big in-joke. Subject: food for thought much Date: Feb 09 2006 04:44:16 AM Author: 4 million light years of puke Researchers at the Gwfyndin University Telescope Center in northern Wales have discovered a new galaxy. It is 4 million light-years from ours and, according to the Welsh astronomers, it is a perfect mirror image of the Milky Way. Maybe there is a little mirror of you in there doing little mirrors of the little things you do. Food for thought much? what i want to know is does it fuck for money? Subject: verdad Date: Feb 08 2006 10:06:54 PM Author: never verdad= truth so fucked up huh! its all one big bluff the press will go crazy!!!!! these guys truly have their finger on the pulse Subject: what's Date: Feb 08 2006 09:20:29 PM Author: this ISSUE ABOUT?! Subject: In regards to this issue- Date: Feb 08 2006 09:03:42 PM Author: CRO This is a stupid issue. |
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