Subject: i know who it is... Date: Nov 28 2007 01:16:41 PM Author: schmigital
...it's robin williams.
Subject: i know why The coldest demon hates Date: Mar 11 2007 04:31:15 PM Author: yes yes yes baby
hey vice me knowest why you hate the ny times, well a duh, besides them being self indulgent wealthy posers who love the poor but are like totally rich and are like totally not slumming it,is because they are u vice yes they r u in the future fuck thats u now....plus they seem to have a little more clout with the people that matter.
Subject: american my ass. Date: Sep 20 2006 11:08:22 PM Author: Dick Sandwich
If this guy was a perfect example of an american, then he would be driving a fucking car, eating fast food, and talking on his cell phone, on the way to pick up his depression medicine... and he probably would have 6 kids and a wife who wants to die.
Subject: americans Date: Sep 11 2006 09:16:34 AM Author: smiles
this guy is the perfect example of an american
Subject: perfect Date: Sep 01 2006 11:20:37 AM Author: yes
this is the best don't of the issue by far
Subject: flip a coin Date: Aug 30 2006 07:35:58 AM Author: applauseX3
do my bit for saving the environment....look like a douche.....do my bit for saving the environment....look like a douche.....do my bit for saving the environment....look like a douche.....dammit...i have to be at work in an hour...
Subject: idea Date: Aug 29 2006 01:00:52 AM Author: brr
i think this fella would make an ideal javeline target. just imagine it. satisfying, right? and cmon, the times a pretentious boomer rag? good one, family guy
Subject: bike boy. Date: Aug 28 2006 10:29:18 PM Author: believe the hype
The bike really screams 40 year old virgin to me for some reason.
I guess there's just something about being a failed researcher turned undergrad professor that makes you ride wierd bikes.
Subject: DIE!! Date: Aug 27 2006 05:17:21 PM Author: arika
this man is the epitome of whats wrong with america! fuck off and die already!
Subject: shit man Date: Aug 25 2006 05:29:20 PM Author: roman
this guy is way to cool !!
Subject: Die! Hippies, die! Date: Aug 25 2006 01:45:05 PM Author: Miss Woo
This is where (original)hippies go to die.
Subject: as Date: Aug 24 2006 03:08:20 PM Author: ads
the only difference between him and anyone else is we're not him.
Subject: precisely 1:00 am Date: Aug 22 2006 02:00:34 AM Author: Daran
Its those fucking clogs again.
God damnit.
They remind me of Ikea.
Infiltrating most middle-class and lower-class homes for two reasons.
1) "modest pricing", aka cheap.
2) those too old or too young can feel part of
the vast group of people who condemm themselves to fagdom by giving in and buying that shit.
I bet a Swede invented those shoes.
And because I'm Swedish, I can say that.
Subject: You work in the SEX industry Date: Aug 17 2006 01:45:37 PM Author: durace
"these are the kind of scumbags that go to strip clubs, talk to the youngest looking girls, and try to make sexy faces at you while you give them lapdances. they are the personification of gross."
What do you want a guy to do when you're giving him a lap dance? Act like hes at the dentist? NOT UNTIL WE HAVE STRIP-CLUB INSURANCE.
Subject: thug on two wheels Date: Aug 17 2006 02:25:59 AM Author: Old Breadbutt
also, I submitted it as a DO.
Subject: thug on two wheels Date: Aug 17 2006 02:14:35 AM Author: Old Breadbutt
ha ha I took that picture in Oakland.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/mcbomb/183530933/
the guy was actually really nice. I think he rocks for doin whatever the fuck he want's.
Subject: sicko Date: Aug 16 2006 06:43:19 PM Author: sprocket
these are the kind of scumbags that go to strip clubs, talk to the youngest looking girls, and try to make sexy faces at you while you give them lapdances. they are the personification of gross.
Subject: Heh Date: Aug 12 2006 01:00:34 AM Author: Bwana Droozl
This is the guy that'll tell you that the movie Grand Canyon changed his life. Now he's whimsical , but he still won't tip his fucking barista.
Subject: lollers Date: Aug 11 2006 06:40:06 PM Author: lollers
Hey look it’s the personification of Vice Magazine, a fucking hipster douche.
the boy who wrote this should obviously be writing these captions.
<If you turned up at someone's house party on that motherfu*ker, all the coke and shit lying around would seem utterly pointless compared to a ride on the 'Scream Machine'>
Subject: I swear Madonna wears clogs like that Date: Aug 11 2006 03:16:14 PM Author: spandex
I think he's sweet, like an environmentally-aware Democrat who remains painfully nostalgic about his 'hip' days (demonstrated by the ill-advised shirt). The one thing I cannot find it in my heart to absolve him of is the clogs plus socks scandal.
Subject: The other White meat Date: Aug 11 2006 11:15:41 AM Author: Crusader
Saying that you would shoot Gisele in the teeth, if she showed up naked on your doorstep wearing those clogs, isn't true and therefore it's not funny.
Same goes for everyone else who claim they would bazooka someone in the groin for wearing a skirt, or something. Vice did this kind of shit three years ago and it wasn't funny then.
Subject: Penis Date: Aug 11 2006 09:25:19 AM Author: Captain
For once this weeks updates made me laugh.
Congratulations for not being total fuckups.
Subject: scre-e-e-e-e-ecchhh! Date: Aug 11 2006 05:00:26 AM Author: Two wheels good
That bike rules. End Of.
If you turned up at someone's house party on that motherfu*ker, all the coke and shit lying around would seem utterly pointless compared to a ride on the 'Scream Machine'
Subject: footwear from hell Date: Aug 11 2006 02:27:21 AM Author: the other white meat
i will shoot the next motherfucker i see wearing those stupid fucking clogs right in the fucking teeth and that is a PROMISE.
if gisele bundchen showed up at my door naked, with a goodie bag full of anal lube and handcuffs while wearing those FUCKING CLOGS...I WILL SHOOT HER IN THE FUCKING TEETH
Subject: damn right! Date: Aug 11 2006 01:05:28 AM Author: shazzam
Fuck you, vice. This guy is doing everything right and smiling while he does it. Go make one of your pretentious, New York scenesters a "don't" for once.
Subject: here's the had i left out Date: Aug 10 2006 11:37:30 PM Author: Gabby's high
had
Subject: the 60s, man Date: Aug 10 2006 11:32:24 PM Author: Gabby Hoffman
The ideas of the 60s may or may not have been misguided, but
I think the point is, they some. Ideas.
Subject: !!!!!!! Date: Aug 10 2006 11:27:06 PM Author: ?????
"pm" are you shitting me????
look at just the music changing in the 60's that's had a major influence in music.
cultural norms were turned around preparing for what was to come.
shit man, study history.
1000s of years from now when they look back on our era as 1900-3000 (because that's what we di with history today..group years into big chunks) there is no doubt in my mind the 60s will be one of the main points.
Subject: you are all Date: Aug 10 2006 08:03:21 PM Author: missing the point
looky that dope ass bike! It has a seat and even a back so you can ride for like, six hundred miles and just lean back with a not-sore ass! Fuckin rad!
Subject: the 60's were a good thing? keep reading Date: Aug 10 2006 02:52:59 PM Author: pm
"at least this guy was around in the 60's when peopel our age actually had new ideas and got out and did stuff about them instead of sitting on their asses and insulting people different from them."
oh no, some boomer wannabe found their way up in here & is indignant that misguided hippy worship isn't a staple on the vice comments. peopel(sic) in the 60's had 'new' ideas? what, praytell might those have been? "screw work", "our parents ruined our spoiled lives"...pleeeeeease tell me about these 'new' ideas and how they've made everything all better.
Subject: SAT ? Date: Aug 10 2006 02:13:59 PM Author: Donny Donuts
If this guy personifies "New York Times"
then
those two fags wearing camo skirts personify "VICE" cuz they think they are being cool but are really being gay
and
that asian chick in the mini dress pesonifies "my cock" cuz it's pink and smells like fresh lunch meat.
Subject: restekpa Date: Aug 10 2006 12:48:16 PM Author: cholo
charles here is riding without the aid of a right arm and leg. The fanny pack on his hip is filled with weights so he doesn't fall off that bitch everytime he turns right. show a hair of compassion.
Subject: this is a do Date: Aug 10 2006 11:39:10 AM Author: Me
Bikes are cool, cars are not.
Subject: NYtimes Date: Aug 10 2006 10:51:59 AM Author: bulitt mcsteve
i like the new york times.
Subject: pussy galore Date: Aug 10 2006 09:22:11 AM Author: chichicastenango
I fucking hate those gay croc rubber fucking dutchy clogs he has on. And the fucking helmet too
Subject: . Date: Aug 10 2006 08:26:55 AM Author: .
that raiders of the lost ark malarkey put the shits in me when i was younger, dont remind me
Subject: " Date: Aug 10 2006 07:33:04 AM Author: {
it is Steven Spielberg !
Subject: that man Date: Aug 10 2006 04:27:59 AM Author: alexander nicholson
hes my dad
Subject: not a DON'T Date: Aug 10 2006 02:22:46 AM Author: getting older
This guy is a total do:
He doens't have the millenium combover. He's not at a club. He's not making a pass at a child. And furthermore, his head is safe, his feet are cool and comfortable, and he's doing his part to put George W out of a job.
Subject: Alphabet Date: Aug 10 2006 01:28:34 AM Author: Chase
Okay, here's my deal: A) He's wearing a helmet. Good saftey precaution but is a guy looking like that really ever going to be going a dangerous speed on anything? No. B) Hawaiian shirts should be outlawed. I don't care if you're a middle-aged man on a vacay in HI. They're ugly. C) He's wearing those clog things which I have heard are enormously comfy but are so abviously hideous. And lastly, D) Not only is he wearing those clog sandal things, he's wearing them in this shitty tan color.
For those wondering, that's exactly why he was put as a DON'T.
Subject: Gary Date: Aug 10 2006 01:27:09 AM Author: Gary
This guy is a righteous symbol of how out of touch Vice is.
His "Do"iness is like the Ark of the Covenant and Vice Magazine is like the melty face of that Nazi.
Subject: whatever Date: Aug 10 2006 12:22:21 AM Author: whatever
at least this guy was around in the 60's when peopel our age actually had new ideas and got out and did stuff about them instead of sitting on their asses and insulting people different from them.
wow has society progressed.
Subject: damn... Date: Aug 09 2006 11:37:15 PM Author: Maurice Clarett
white people is WACK
Subject: vanessa Date: Aug 09 2006 11:34:09 PM Author: god
"I let him just because I thought it would be funny."
"do your neighbor as you would have him do you."
vanessa, by the power vested in me by myself, i declare us god and wife.
Subject: very good and very nice Date: Aug 09 2006 10:54:48 PM Author: lil willoughby
This is my favorite don't in a millenium! Nice job!
Subject: yeah Date: Aug 09 2006 10:44:05 PM Author: burn
way to fuckin insult old, unhip people. they've had it too good for too long. what i used to love about the dos and don'ts is they'd fuck with genres of people that weren't fucked with, or even noticed, and when you read it, you'd be like, "yeah! i hella know what you mean. fuck those guys." now you're going after old bearded men with tucked in hawaiian shirts and fanny packs and acting like you're some kind of fuckin laugh executive. you're not, though!
Subject: 1 Date: Aug 09 2006 10:09:32 PM Author: d
godddddddddddaaaammmmmmmmmmm there is some bitter hateful people trolling these comments.............
mother of god.
hands up who likes the contradictions in life???
*MEEEEEEEEE*
hands up who likes the fact that that gavin dude came out of nowhere and did something cool like no one gives a fuck and still doesnt give a fuck????
*MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE*
hands up - actually nah fuck it i think i made my point.
kefe mada ussi
Subject: This round i got Date: Aug 09 2006 09:10:14 PM Author: Robbie Williams
I have no problem with Robin Williams. Drink one on me, bro!
I guess this is why Vice is known as "America's magazine/record label/retailer/film studio of record."
Subject: fill in the blank Date: Aug 09 2006 07:50:43 PM Author: alfalfa numeric
Did you notice how you can substitute 'New York Times' with 'Vice' and the caption would have the exact same effect???
Subject: NOT REALLY... Date: Aug 09 2006 05:55:57 PM Author: AHHH,
this is, again, actually a DO, vice,vice vice ,c'mon, retract thine heads from thine flappy arseholes you crack head bitches ,this dude is so very cool , low emission wheels, smiling (drug free) away ....sans clogs, yes, but he gets props for that as he is 60+...you bike phobes... OH...agist fucks too...LOL commaheads
Subject: egg-zactly Date: Aug 09 2006 06:04:09 PM Author: pm
this dude wants to be robin williams so hard he can taste it. all hirsute men with money dream of it. when was robin williams last funny or relevant? 1973? robin williams has been a don't for like 35 years or something.
Subject: Literary love Date: Aug 09 2006 05:52:08 PM Author: Vanessa
"I dunno, this guy looks like he's fun. He'd probably buy you a Dilly bar at the Dairy Queen."
That's interesting because he reminds me of a married English prof who tried to "dilly bar" me in his office after a lecture on negative portrayals of servants in Victorian literature. I let him just because I thought it would be funny.
Subject: Gary Date: Aug 09 2006 05:50:59 PM Author: Gary
I dunno, this guy looks like he's fun. He'd probably buy you a Dilly bar at the Dairy Queen.
Subject: Pax Asiatica Date: Aug 09 2006 05:46:17 PM Author: Dirty Dave
I miss the days when the Taiwanese made shoes that looked like they were made in America. Now, "Made in Taiwan" equals "looks like it was made in Taiwan."
Subject: Green Date: Aug 09 2006 05:36:43 PM Author: Marie
Vice is just jealous because the New York Times will still be around in five years.
Subject: clogs Date: Aug 09 2006 05:29:52 PM Author: .
The clogs started out as something for fishermen and gardeners; easy to clean, better support than sandals. But, as Vice has said, most people dress like they are at a sleepover. I guess the thought process is "I am going to a restaurant. Why not throw on the shitty plastic shoes I wore while washing my car?".
Subject: shoes fuck crocs Date: Aug 09 2006 05:30:26 PM Author: tom
my dad bought some of those shoes last week. i hit him.
Subject: LA Date: Aug 09 2006 04:38:25 PM Author: baz
dude looks like he's cruisin around compton and shit! prolly got a glock in the front baggy! dudes from fallen down!
Subject: fucking jesus christ Date: Aug 09 2006 04:13:10 PM Author: Greg
I HATE the Time!!! Especially that Tyler Hicks mother fucker!!!!
Subject: this photo Date: Aug 09 2006 04:10:29 PM Author: SM
He's the guy in tight pants and on a track bike for his population segment.
Subject: rumor has it Date: Aug 09 2006 04:10:58 PM Author: Alva Gingras
apparently they are super comfortable, but I would rather suffer than look that ridiculous
Subject: space age clogs Date: Aug 09 2006 04:07:41 PM Author: Mister Bister
those shoes, those fucking shoes...
Subject: ? Date: Aug 09 2006 04:06:57 PM Author: -
why are people wearing those shoes? are they cheap? comfortable?- just don't get it- someone explain
Subject: "everyone's ravin about 'em...everyone!" Date: Aug 09 2006 03:53:13 PM Author: sally
i was just waiting for those shoes to show up in the dont's
Subject: (alternate caption) Date: Aug 09 2006 03:13:58 PM Author: Salt n Nuts
I propose jihad on those effing clog shoes that every douche-fuck is wearing these days. Either you're with us or you're with the terrorists!
Subject: . Date: Aug 09 2006 02:59:22 PM Author: .
nice, comma, use, Vice.
Subject: rating: Date: Aug 09 2006 02:41:12 PM Author: d &d rater
6.5
Subject: moral cruise-ader Date: Aug 09 2006 02:35:09 PM Author: hip daddy
i think hes really with it
Subject: gaga Date: Aug 09 2006 02:27:11 PM Author: gaga
hes obviously from queens.
Subject: dying of cancer Date: Aug 09 2006 02:28:19 PM Author: pope
newspapers are so gross
Subject: The NYT? Date: Aug 09 2006 02:20:15 PM Author: Eric
What is this, Fox News? F for originality.
East Indians have high IQs, which makes things real interesting when they completely lose their fucking minds.
While getting completely black-out wasted every weekend isn't so great for your liver, it does turn Sunday mornings into your own personal version of Lost. Comments/Enlarge See all
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