So far the only funny thing Jerry Seinfeld has done is convince an entire generation of unmarried uncles that it’s perfectly acceptable to dress like a member of a New Edition tribute band made up of guys on their first day out of rehab.

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Instead of picking fights all the time short guys need to try and convert all their excess testosterone into game. It’s like, fuck fists lets fist-fuck.

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Why are uncles so much cooler than dads? Oh yeah, uncles didn’t spend a quarter of a century with you up in their grill making them bald and shitty.

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