OK gays, here’s the challenge. Please find her gross starting right now. Put those boobs in your hands and say, “Eeew.” Now, we realize staring at a splayed pussy may be a bit freaky, shit, even we get a bit weirded out by “Sammy with his eye out,” but if it was a dimly lit room and all you had to do was put it in (without looking) and bury your face in those suckers? COME ON! Your pants are on fire if you don’t admit you’d be into it.

COMMENTS
Date: Jun 13 2008 03:56:55 AM
Author: ernst jünger

I'd fuck Baby Spice, too. But that doesn't mean she's a Do.



Date: May 28 2008 01:20:09 AM
Author: Dr Doom

She's giving him the 'you can look, but you can never touch' shuffle.. and he's just realised it's true and he may as well just leave the party, go home and jerk off now.



Date: May 07 2008 01:33:33 PM
Author: Jacques Cues

Clare - Hi Becky, you coming to the club tonight?

Becky - Sure, but im surfing the crimson tide, i better not sport my hot girl shorts.

Clare - Well sure, why not wear those period jeans you bought in Debenhams when they had that power cut last spring.

Becky - Woo hoo, Awesome idea Clare, but i didnt buy them. My mum did when she found out i was sleeping with Trey.

x s



Date: May 07 2008 01:33:15 PM
Author: Jacques Cues

Clare - Hi Becky, you coming to the club tonight?

Becky - Sure, but im surfing the crimson tide, i better not sport my hot girl shorts.

Clare - Well sure, why not wear those period jeans you bought in Debenhams when they had that power cut last spring.

Becky - Woo hoo, Awesome idea Clare, but i didnt buy them. My mum did when she found out i was sleeping with Trey.

x s



Date: Apr 30 2008 06:19:21 PM
Author: challenge?

Eww.

1: 'Florida' t-shirt bought in Panama-City Alvins island at three in the morning:

Beyond gross, this is like THE warning that this poor girl has at least seven uncurable STDs; by-products of her natural-ice induced trailer-park beach-docuhe fetish.

I'd give her a long cuddle and a puppy if we wouldn't get crabs and that blistering deathrash going around the 15 cent Mozambiquian red light district.

2. Wal-mart Leather-jacketed trailer trash destin-douche hitting on her: I'm about to throw up, gross leauges beyond the plaid pajama pants.

And her vag stinks.



Date: Apr 30 2008 01:35:07 AM
Author: ooh

she has a beautiful nose



Date: Apr 07 2008 12:58:50 PM
Author: Regicide

her demon eyes are gross, i wouldnt fuck a chick with red eyes...... nevermind i totally would



Date: Mar 20 2008 03:03:13 PM
Author: gorgeousgab

bodies cool, but the face... looks like your common honkie, not too exciting



Subject: chick
Date: Mar 17 2008 08:07:32 PM
Author: fotze

i'd analyze that one



Subject: Surprise!
Date: Mar 15 2008 09:50:09 AM
Author: GeorgeC

I like the look of thrilled surprise on the face of the bloke she's talking to



Subject: Haterade
Date: Mar 14 2008 11:25:18 PM
Author: Missing you to death

If you're a chick who says she isn't hot then you're beyond jealous... because I am a chick who is jealous of her and I still can't get over her hotness. Damn.



Subject: Blonde woman, probably shaved
Date: Mar 11 2008 07:28:06 PM
Author: G-Rock (Cool with a capital G)

I think she's a nice old fashioned country girl whooping it up on a saturday night. She'll probably just go home (alone) at around 1:30am and drive everyone in the club to go home and jerk off twice at 2:30am..



Subject: ew
Date: Mar 06 2008 02:55:31 PM
Author: courtney

gross

i'm straight and she isn't hot

also i'm a girl



Subject: cracking
Date: Feb 28 2008 01:32:04 AM
Author: junglestu

top bird



Subject: response
Date: Feb 25 2008 02:11:44 PM
Author: Jameson

Shes so hot id have sex with her boyfriend



Subject: white girl
Date: Feb 21 2008 07:14:34 PM
Author: aids spreader

all you guys pretending youre too cool and shes not hot are full of shit. she is hot. young, stupid and you could most likely fuck her in the ass. oh and i agree black girls are gross. i always imagine how bad their cunts smell when i see them



Subject: donations
Date: Feb 21 2008 01:59:48 PM
Author: Steven Tyler's Son

Remember when rock stars used to bag chicks like this? Now that rock stars are a dying breed, the Puerto Rican douchebags with sleeve fringe and baseball caps are moving in. Please, someone donate money to a major record label of your choice!!!!



Subject: bit general dont you think?
Date: Feb 19 2008 05:11:52 AM
Author: pat

she's dressed like a 12 year old australian?
no, really, please, tell me how many 12 year old australians you know, let alone how many you know that dress like this.
do you know any australians for that matter?



Subject: ehh
Date: Feb 19 2008 02:12:13 AM
Author: nahh

I'm straight and I don't even find her attractive



Subject: Um, no.
Date: Feb 13 2008 05:22:10 PM
Author: Fag

Honestly, I'd have to be paid millions before I'd even talk to that trashy bitch.



Subject: hmmm
Date: Feb 08 2008 05:11:32 AM
Author: snap

pants n'top combo is a bonafide lust-killer there. other than that she's a right duuurty one. spunk her in the ear, mate



Subject: The lady
Date: Feb 07 2008 03:29:50 PM
Author: Dad

It's me mum...



Subject: bitch
Date: Feb 05 2008 01:25:16 PM
Author: peter

would like to fuck her ass



Subject: nah
Date: Jan 28 2008 08:17:50 AM
Author: bahh

she's dressed like a 12 year old australian



Subject: my vote
Date: Jan 24 2008 08:16:22 PM
Author: copy this

i vote yes



Subject: I'd put a hurtin on that hot shit
Date: Jan 21 2008 02:05:21 PM
Author: LaRone (from Detroit)

Hah, this is the exact type of girl that makes the fruity-asses jealous. She’s the type that can drive a fehg straight.



Subject: .
Date: Jan 19 2008 06:13:37 PM
Author: a white girl

black girls are ugly and dirty



Subject: -
Date: Jan 19 2008 03:00:34 PM
Author: AL

i disagree with yowza



Subject: ok gays
Date: Jan 18 2008 05:00:17 PM
Author: dusty krystles

so wait, does that mean all straight guys would "put it in" a super-hot guy if the room was dim enough? this i gotta see.



Subject: oh yeah...
Date: Jan 17 2008 08:47:12 PM
Author: Jbom

and if she was black and that hot, same goes again !



Subject: yes...
Date: Jan 17 2008 08:41:31 PM
Author: Jbom

I would eat a turd to get at her. You betcha.. I don't care what the rest of you think!



Subject: white bias
Date: Jan 17 2008 05:27:31 PM
Author: shrill liberal

oh yeah this trashy white girl is sooooo hot with her blonde hair (probably fake) and tan skin (self-tanning lotion anyone?). you people are a fucking joke, everyone knows scandinavian is out. get with the (sociology) program and start talking about how hot black girls are. you fucking nazis.



Subject: caption action
Date: Jan 16 2008 02:27:35 PM
Author: go@!

man "hey baby, jerk me off and ill give you VIP access to my garage band practice. you can even wear my crusty leather rocker jacket that looks terrible with a baseball cap.."
girl- " oh boy! "



Subject: tony lameassassino
Date: Jan 16 2008 11:43:50 AM
Author: fuck haute couture

oh, hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha! You are really a real delusional piece of work! You're even more psycho and retarded than I thought if you believe for one second that you are not one in the same. Go sell that shit to some girl scouts.



Subject: FHC
Date: Jan 16 2008 05:52:16 AM
Author: Tony Badassassino

You're a real bitter piece of work (not to mentioned paranoid), you know that? I'm almost feeling sorry for you. And don't blame me for what Vane$$a says and does. She was always more manipulative than I could ever be. We are NOT the same person.



Subject: tony lameassassino
Date: Jan 16 2008 05:14:32 AM
Author: fuck haute couture

how convenient of you to drop by while vane$$a and I are conversing! What a wonderful coincidence! How's France?

anyway, since you deleted your profile, the message is no longer there. Sorry. to paraphrase, it was something like, "is this you know who from you know where?" and I was like, "yeah". Wow, that was heavy.



Subject: hat
Date: Jan 16 2008 01:50:17 AM
Author: old

wow, i am so sick of readin all the comments commentating on "recycled" photos and captions, maybe they are just trying to fuck with you? they pretty much hate you. created monsters.



Subject: fuck you...fucking fuckers
Date: Jan 15 2008 07:52:26 PM
Author: drex

now wait a fucking minute...all of these fucking pictures are fucking old! jesus fucking christ on the fucking cross! arent you fucks making enough fucking money to pay a fucking stoner to come up with this fucking shit

i am fucking depressed



Subject: fuck off
Date: Jan 15 2008 07:46:46 PM
Author: drex

that fucking pic is old as fuck

i mean how fucking hard is it to come up with a fucking pic of a hot fucking girl that fucking dresses decent

fuck the fuck off you lazy fucks



Subject: regular girls
Date: Jan 15 2008 02:51:26 PM
Author: I want a weener

She just looks regular hot to me. Like, the rest of us. Can I please have a penis so I can constantly be turned on by regular good-looking girls? Thanks!



Subject: stop your arguing
Date: Jan 15 2008 11:56:59 AM
Author: now now

i taught english as a second language in europe last year. lots of americans do. got a tefl certificate and off i went. easy as pie. i know americans who didn't even get certified. they just made less.



Subject: Posters
Date: Jan 15 2008 11:48:47 AM
Author: Truth

I can see you all - drinking poncy coffee, dressed in American apparal clothing or similar, typing on your new spec Mac while listening to crap guitar based music on I-tunes, while mummy and daddy pay for the University education you are quite blatantly wasting. Why, you may ask, am I posting - well am in a break between surgery (am a nurse) and was told about this wank website filled with twats and that reading it will make me feel better about myself - totally right there!



Subject: prove you're not a liar
Date: Jan 15 2008 06:00:35 AM
Author: Tony Badassassino

What did my message that I sent to your myspace say?



Subject: vane$$a lameassassino
Date: Jan 15 2008 05:46:46 AM
Author: fuck haute couture

i can't believe we're still having this conversation. I am not an EU citizen. You know that Tony sent me a message because you ARE Tony. I highly doubt that you are TEFL certified because you have obviously never left Youngstown, Ohio. You know I dislike living here because you stalk my MySpace page. I don't like you because you are psycho. Any more questions? You could just send them to my MySpace since I know you have it bookmarked. Idiot.



Subject: seriouslly
Date: Jan 14 2008 10:58:52 PM
Author: phil

i mean..id do her and all, but shes just not exactly my type..she is a little red sonja-ish though shes blonde, which would make her some nordic destroyer.



Subject: you're making me cry!!!
Date: Jan 14 2008 01:15:29 PM
Author: Vane$$a

I am TEFL certified so I do know a thing or two!!!!!!! So then how did you get EU citizenship? Did you marry your bf? Why do you hate me so much? And what about the letter Tony said he sent you at your myspace? It doesn't seem like Germany is making you very happy. Don't you think EFL is kinda imperialistic?



Subject: vane$$a lameassassino
Date: Jan 14 2008 11:58:08 AM
Author: fuck haute couture

it's really ok with me if you want to call me a liar and a fake or whatever else, but don't be fucking retarded: EFL stands for English as a FOREIGN Language, which is taught almost exclusively by native English speakers. Newsflash, genius--over 400 million native English speakers have citizenships somewhere, you know, OTHER than Europe.

not that you'd know what was necessary to get a job in Europe, you cloistered sack of worthless midwestern trash.

toodles!



Subject: Barbie
Date: Jan 14 2008 04:40:39 AM
Author: Ken

It's what's inside that counts, it's not the peel it's the nana.



Subject: boobs
Date: Jan 14 2008 12:56:53 AM
Author: bailey

cream of the crop boobies and an absolutely perfect belly button...hatchet vs. genitals



Subject: anal clearasil
Date: Jan 13 2008 12:26:29 PM
Author: Corndoggie

If she's got zits like that on her arm, imagine the pimply breeding ground her ass must be! Believe me, I know from experience that it's gotta be nasty!



Subject: fist abortion technician
Date: Jan 13 2008 10:24:08 AM
Author: hollywood_hillbilly

It looks like her puerto rican boyfriend is about to punch her in the stomach thereby avoiding any future embarassment.



Subject: shite!
Date: Jan 13 2008 10:11:59 AM
Author: holly

My God, she's beautiful



Subject: FHC LIAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Date: Jan 13 2008 08:46:44 AM
Author: Vane$$a

The only fake around here is FHC. She claims to be an EFL teacher in Germany, but anybody who knows anything knows that those jobs are next to impossible to get without an EU passport. She claims to be an American from Seattle.



Subject: 000
Date: Jan 13 2008 08:45:46 AM
Author: 000

or a V.C. Andrews novel!



Subject: not FHC
Date: Jan 13 2008 08:04:13 AM
Author: fuck haute couture

hahahahahahahaha!!! No, they wouldn't. It would be a big ball of unfunny, condescending, schizophrenic self-loathing.



Subject: wa wa wi wa
Date: Jan 13 2008 07:44:35 AM
Author: Mischa

holy shit!!! it´s a very nice one ... I like!



Subject: this one is way old
Date: Jan 12 2008 11:49:55 PM
Author: ok

and it's in the book
vacation time at vice magazine?



Subject: nuh-nuh
Date: Jan 12 2008 11:40:19 PM
Author: nnneehwhat?

check coke eyes and clenched fist on the beau that she's being all cute for. her charms are definitely being wasted on the wasted. i do believe he's actually staring at her necklace rather than her ta-tas. now that's high.



Subject: Jone$$assissino
Date: Jan 12 2008 01:49:09 PM
Author: not FHC

Racism? WTF?
I bet all those people in your head would be good characters in a play. Then again, maybe not



Subject: correction
Date: Jan 12 2008 01:43:59 PM
Author: Vane$$a

Dammit! I meant to say "literate" in that last post. Drunken Numb nuts!!!



Subject: racism
Date: Jan 12 2008 10:53:43 AM
Author: Vane$$a

Oh FHC, you're such a racist. You think there's only one clever, illiterate white woman in the whole world. I'm flattered that it's me, but there is more of us you know.



Subject: Generic 'not very well-dressed' girl.
Date: Jan 12 2008 08:39:03 AM
Author: Emily

Her outfit is BORING. She looks BORING. But I guess if you're only concerned with her cup size...



Subject: no way...
Date: Jan 12 2008 08:31:47 AM
Author: no way...

...the shades match the curtains



Subject: very sleepy
Date: Jan 12 2008 06:38:35 AM
Author: The Smackdown

I think this girl is pretty cute but then again I am a girl and so really am clueless as to what is so appealing about one girl as opposed to another... Gavin is forever reminiscing about the days when he lived in the suburbs and was a dork, blah blah blah, and the girls he picks for do's reflect the sort of fantasies he had as a youngster. She's a classic adolescent fantasy: blonde and busty with lots of skin showing and a promiscuous vibe. Duh.

I hope you make love better than you write. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...



Subject: spongecake with kitten breath
Date: Jan 12 2008 06:18:31 AM
Author: Homo Majora

I'd be into it if she didn't talk or try to kiss me. And I would have to hold my breath or wear a surgeon's mask. It's not really fair to her, is it?



Subject: final diagnosis
Date: Jan 12 2008 04:43:29 AM
Author: fuck haute couture

I think this girl is pretty cute but then again I am a girl and so really am clueless as to what is so appealing about one girl as opposed to another... Gavin is forever reminiscing about the days when he lived in the suburbs and was a dork, blah blah blah, and the girls he picks for do's reflect the sort of fantasies he had as a youngster. She's a classic adolescent fantasy: blonde and busty with lots of skin showing and a promiscuous vibe. Duh.

"Jonette" is Vane$$a, ignore it and it will go away.



Subject: holy smokes, user="smokes"!
Date: Jan 12 2008 02:54:44 AM
Author: ;

you don't "deck somebody in the face". you just deck them. consequently, they hit the "deck". the verb has a spatial connotation. thanks for your time, vice readers!



Subject: 000
Date: Jan 12 2008 02:07:25 AM
Author: 000

This girl tried to start a Conga line but every got to nervous due to sweaty palms and something that happens around a complete 10,scientists call it Puberty 2!



Subject: I
Date: Jan 12 2008 12:23:58 AM
Author: Eat

Shit



Subject: ONE WAY STREET
Date: Jan 11 2008 11:30:05 PM
Author: JAMES

SHE'S A BARREL IN THE MAKING. GIVE HER TWO AND HALF YEARS.



Subject: Questioning Life
Date: Jan 11 2008 08:51:47 PM
Author: namename

This girl makes me feel like dumping my ass on the couch and watching infomercials 7 hours straight.
I couldn't give two flying fucks about her.



Subject: the gatekeeper
Date: Jan 11 2008 08:16:44 PM
Author: keymaster

it's zool!



Subject: ...
Date: Jan 11 2008 05:54:44 PM
Author: Sal

I love hipster trash that's looking for free booze...



Subject: nyet
Date: Jan 11 2008 03:57:28 PM
Author: Mr. Crumbles

She looks like a classic gold digger that just got off the last boat from some dead-dick Russian shithole out on the frozen steppe. And that arm zit? It's fuckin hideous man. It's got enough oily pus in there to fuel an Escalade for a year.



Subject: situations
Date: Jan 11 2008 03:53:43 PM
Author: Jonette

Question: If she's so hot, then what the fuck is she doing in that place, with that guy, dressed like that, with that hair? Shouldn't she at least be in a cooler situation that that? I know I am.

I think I'll have to reject the pix request, junior.



Subject: shithead...
Date: Jan 11 2008 03:45:42 PM
Author: look...

she has AN arm zit fuckwad...can't you count to ONE???...Her hair's fixable, then she's a 10...



Subject: blah
Date: Jan 11 2008 03:08:15 PM
Author: nobody

worst.caption.ever.



Subject: jonette
Date: Jan 11 2008 02:31:13 PM
Author: comic book guy

damn - you can pull any doofus around closing time? this is called "having a vagina."

but you're apparently a mind reader, so that probably makes your game more efficient.

oh and prove your hotness, jonette. linx 2 pix plz



Subject: _____
Date: Jan 11 2008 01:00:43 PM
Author: _____

nasty hand rings. i don't want those around my cock! Again nasty bleached hair, greasy looking. SHE IS EVIL! SHE HAS FIRE RED EYES LIKE HER FATHER,SATAN! ONE UGLY SUCCUBUS!



Subject: ;sfngko;ng
Date: Jan 11 2008 10:36:49 AM
Author: karasu

im still chortlin' at the guy looking at her



Subject: rerun
Date: Jan 11 2008 10:01:02 AM
Author: bomb23

I have to jump on the WTF bandwagon... Others have been dissing y'all for posting reruns. I guess what with the writer's strike this is what we get... but shit - i KNOW this is one has been posted already. I won't say y'all suck, but, I miss the new and original material.



Subject: WOW !!!!!
Date: Jan 11 2008 09:27:23 AM
Author: Hank

Oh man is she hot!!!!!!!!!!



Subject: comicsq
Date: Jan 11 2008 09:08:48 AM
Author: comic book guy

a. jonette is jealous; that girl is smokin'
b. didn't you already use that "cmon gays, try to find boobs gross" construction already, vice? man i'm lame



Subject: crapper companion
Date: Jan 11 2008 08:52:39 AM
Author: Jonette

She's a hideous greased out monster with bleached blonde hair, heavy mascara, arm zits, and an ass chin. And the boobs? They're obviously defenseless against the evils of gravity. She looks like your run o' the mill groupie type, i.e. the most used piece of equipment this side of the tour bus john.



Subject: conan
Date: Jan 11 2008 08:17:07 AM
Author: the desrtoyer

2 words:

red sonja



Subject: fuck..
Date: Jan 11 2008 08:15:39 AM
Author: smokes

shes about ready to deck that dude in the face , lookit those clenched fists



Subject: heh heh
Date: Jan 11 2008 04:43:56 AM
Author: Right right

Look at the mother fker lookin at her! Ahahaha!



Subject: Nope
Date: Jan 11 2008 04:38:59 AM
Author: a gay

Nope



Subject: bombrepeat
Date: Jan 11 2008 02:43:43 AM
Author: pseudo

I saw her holding a sign along the side of I-74 that read: "Bonnaroo or bust".

I hope she made it.



Subject: ;
Date: Jan 11 2008 02:13:32 AM
Author: ;

what the fuck is this shit? "imagine a disembodied vagina. and some titties. yeaaaaaaaah. oh yeaaaaaaah. that's a DO."



Subject: !
Date: Jan 11 2008 01:19:19 AM
Author: rob-omb

On a purely shallow level, I'd bite my fist like Lenny & Squiggy if that girl passed me by.....



Subject: I disagree
Date: Jan 11 2008 12:49:36 AM
Author: esqueape

I'm straight and I don't think yowza is too.



Subject: truth is
Date: Jan 11 2008 12:47:02 AM
Author: manly

because youve been hurt and you have low self esteem.



Subject: i disagree
Date: Jan 11 2008 12:15:17 AM
Author: yowza

i'm straight and i don't think i'd go out of my way to talk to that girl at a bar.



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Then again, things could just as easily swing toward teenwolf Debbie Gibson leading into light Joan Miro rockabilly as it gets later. All depends on the winds.
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Say what you will about Lauryn Hill’s unexpected comeback, but you have to admire her bravery.
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