If you haven’t seen the new series of Skins yet here’s what you’re missing: lesbian fondling, MDMA, weed, coke, brothels, sex rooms, kids losing their virginity, guys fucking their best friend’s sisters… it’s pretty epic.
Thursday’s episode was Pandora’s pyjama party. Recalling my teen years, these gatherings usually involve face masks, communal spot picking, cake and hair braiding (I shit you not). The Skins pyjama party was ever so slightly different though. Here’s what I thought of the clothes they did it in.
Pandora is supposed to be the kooky one of the lot – she has one of those Bristolian accents (“alright my loverrrrrr”) that’s amazing to rip the piss out of. To convey her wackiness she’s dressed in bright florals, trainers and plastic hair accessories. Think C&A circa 2000, a look that makes her appear about 13 years old. Quite disturbing when she gets her cherry popped at the end of the episode. Or hot, depending on your sexual preference.
There are twins in Skins now. Typically one of them is a slut, the other an uptight lesbian. So they dress one of them in a brown dress and ugly mustard tights and one of them gets to whip their boobs out constantly.
Naomi Campbell (LOL, right?) is a bit weird. She doesn’t really say anything and keeps snogging one of the twins. Her clothes are OK – somewhere in between the slutty twin, the gay twin, and the kooky one. She reminds me of someone I know whose fashion icon is Kate Moss. She likes her so much she wears everything she’s seen her in – ALL AT ONCE.
Effy’s the hot one, the one they brought back from seasons 1 and 2, and she’s still the youngest cast member. Effy has the best wardrobe in my opinion - black leather, chunky boots and heavy jewelry. She also has a banging body, which helps. I saw her at a Metronomy gig once and she still looked hot in an oversized t-shirt and not a lot else. Basically, the sixteen-year-old inside me hates her.
Next friday we get to look at what Karen’s wearing – she’s even more of a slut than the slutty twin.
Reader Comments
February 16th, 2009
12:11 pm
Why do you endorse this shit?
February 16th, 2009
12:45 pm
this has to be some kind of joke
February 16th, 2009
1:46 pm
Whats the craic with this like? is it supposed to be funny?
February 16th, 2009
4:47 pm
i’ve never watched skins until i saw the ending of last nights episode, basically the bit were she gets her cherry popped. strange that you would do this straight after. effy is gorgeous! and i do like her style from what i saw.
February 16th, 2009
7:52 pm
skins is absolutely pathetic, completely unrealistic, and nobody over the age of 18 should be watching it. since when were grown adults interested in what a bunch of 16-18 year olds get up to in their spare time (although i’m completely certain that it’s reflective of the lives of about 2% of the 16-18 yr old population). apparently they’re all having sex and taking drugs constantly. in which case they should all be wearing tracksuits, listening to “bangin’ house” and watching jeremy kyle. these upper middle class twats usually wait until uni to rebel against their fully co-operative swinger parents.
February 16th, 2009
11:58 pm
This is the best thing I have EVER read, thankyou!
I love Skins, it’s so great, I hope when I’m a teenager I can be like these cool kids.
Maybe next week Vice could write about some CBBC programs, me and my friends think they’re cool but not as cool as Skins.
I hope they make a Skins film, LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Vice is soooooooooooo cool, how can I get my school to get the issues sent to them to put in the Library?
February 17th, 2009
12:07 am
grreat work vice. great fucking work.
my 12 yr old niece needs somewhere to publish her online diary – interested???
February 17th, 2009
10:16 pm
i think a feature comprising the best
of anti-vice comments left on vice
would be a pretty sick read.
do that instead.
February 18th, 2009
12:26 am
Skins? Really? Are you guys even trying to be cool any more?
February 18th, 2009
1:33 am
a decade of vice ruined with one article…..whoever wrote this should be ashamed.
February 18th, 2009
2:53 pm
‘I hope when I’m a teenager I can be like these cool kids.’
I love skins, and vice is pretty mint but is this kid serious?
Nice article thought.
February 19th, 2009
12:14 pm
I would eff Effy, arf arf
February 20th, 2009
1:55 am
This is fantastic.
I hope next week you update us on what the cool cats from hollyoaks wear.
February 20th, 2009
1:58 pm
whats happened to vice. skins is fucking depressing. o were are rich kids watch us fuck each over and o.d and shop at h&m blah blah blah …..
i would love to fuck someone with aids then go and
fuck all the cast and laugh then go and
get drunk wait i will just shoot them cos i dont wont
aids am happy with my cock
why dont they do a realistic episode where someone
gets rapped or stabed
i like rape
age 9
i made my mummys fanny big and she hits me
February 20th, 2009
4:33 pm
SKINS IS WANK
February 20th, 2009
5:30 pm
If kids actually inspire to be like the cast of Skins it’s actually really pathetic and sad.
I think the producers need to sort their fucking lives out and stop promoting this bullshit. No wonder Britain has so many sluts running about with every STI under the sun.
This article is fucking lame and whoever wrote it should be ashamed that they aspire to be a 16 year old slut.
March 3rd, 2009
10:27 pm
Skins is a joke. Since when do you put MDMA in brownies, find secret underground raves in bright daylight and trash schools.
May 5th, 2009
3:56 pm
best thing about anything skins related was shame on a nigga by wu tang-clan.
has some greazzzzy swine flu ridden e4 producer extorted you guys, raped you of your dignity and made you endorse this shit?
June 30th, 2009
10:51 pm
Kbcukc comment2 ,