Dance like nobody’s watching. Love like you’ve never been hurt. Sing like nobody’s listening. Fall asleep in a children’s playground with a fully loaded high-powered handgun on your belt.
Ah yes. When the long dick of the law is done fucking you and goes all limpy limpy.
Date: Jun 09 2008 08:30:32 AM Author: Coz
you vicius... so did you took the gun ?
Date: May 21 2008 08:46:09 PM Author: rab
wow, a 4skins reference.
is it 1983?
thats awesome.
Date: May 21 2008 08:22:05 AM Author: hihi
all cops are bastards
all cops are bastards
all cops are bastards
all cops are bastards
yerr so. could take that
fkn gun off her right now
Date: May 15 2008 07:35:33 AM Author: Mundo
Wat'choo sayin' I need to be awake n'all? Hain't no crime being committed roun' here!
Date: Apr 10 2008 04:25:36 PM Author: j
i like how these people constantly criticize the writers... but they keep reading and taking time to comment, and their comments aren't the least bit insightful or funny or clever or good.
and that gun is not a pea-shooter. an idiot who says shit like that must have problems up in the brain-box. that's a gen-you-wine deadly firearm right there. perhaps you prefer to carry an SMG, tough guy, but a bullet from that can kill all the same.
Date: Apr 03 2008 12:55:11 AM Author: ramdom
laFF the gun doesn't even seem to be clipped in
Date: Mar 20 2008 10:52:04 AM Author: guy
holy shit this made me laugh pretty hard. priceless fo' sho!
This section's all about fashion, so this photo is a Don't thanks to those Too-Short-For-TV trousers.
Subject: nothing Date: Mar 14 2008 02:43:11 PM Author: nobody
I wonder if she has been smoking pot on the job. Maybe time for a drug test.
Subject: mhmm Date: Mar 11 2008 06:54:15 PM Author: hmmm
cunt
Subject: Cops Date: Mar 07 2008 08:33:20 AM Author: Nevi Denmark
I can see the donut crumbs on the earth before her big feet.. (I have good eyes)..lol!
Subject: yea Date: Mar 05 2008 09:38:43 PM Author: Igotta.45
Such as the .45 acp.I love my pistol:)
Subject: Pea-shooter? Date: Mar 05 2008 08:47:35 PM Author: Bill Vincent
"Itty Bitty pea-shooter"??? Take a round from a 38 Special, .357 Mag or .45 long colt and then call it a pea-shooter you goof. Why is it that all the street punks think 9mm is so bad-ass? There are many handguns with way more stopping power than a nine. LOL
Subject: dong Date: Feb 29 2008 11:12:47 AM Author: ding
ha ha ha, I thought do's and don'ts were gonna suck after gavin left, I haven't even looked at the vice site in two months. whoever your new guy is writing them, he's doing an awesome job.
what boners? who carnage?
Subject: STAR WARZZZ Date: Feb 22 2008 09:47:31 AM Author: Moosh Moosh
Where was she on 9/11?
Sleeping.
Now let me write this shit for you guys cause you suck so much now.
Subject: Comment Date: Feb 22 2008 05:08:47 AM Author: Yes
fucking awesome caption. F all those wankers who said it's shite. They're shite, and the know it. Everybody reckon's they're a bloody expert.
Subject: That's not a children's playground, Date: Feb 14 2008 05:15:14 PM Author: Bobby Peru
that's the La Brea Tarpit in Los Angeles....
Subject: 0 Date: Feb 14 2008 02:28:58 PM Author: roy g biv
She is a statue that you can pose with, you know maybe some bunny ears, but then she shoots you.
Subject: what? Date: Feb 10 2008 10:13:35 PM Author: Tom C
A REVOLVER?
No Glock? What is she, a meter maid or something?
No brutha would bother trying to snach a little itty-bitty pea-shooter like that!
Subject: smart Date: Feb 10 2008 06:36:51 PM Author: smart
It's a trap, she's sucking you into her web with her whole Dorito Dreamin act. Then, when you think you're gonna get the gun, she pounces. Like a cat. On crack. With a gun.
Subject: i just love my job Date: Feb 07 2008 05:54:15 AM Author: mike
i can sleep eat and fuck people over . and no one can do jack shit about it because i am the law !
Subject: Whaddaya want for fuck allz!? Date: Feb 06 2008 09:36:14 AM Author: LiL' Lord Luncheonton
Oh for the love of the zombie Christ's cock!! Get over it Ryan and all you other lonely masturbators who insist on complaining about the writing. Jesus, if it's that offensive then find something else to read. Consistenly the dos and don'ts are gut-busters. How inconsiderate of Vice to produce such a hilarious product that costs you nothing.
Damn you Vice for providing free entertainment and hilarity!!!
Get over yourselves douchewax.
Subject: Try it. Date: Feb 06 2008 12:44:23 AM Author: fisticuffs
You know that's actually some crazy fat chick camouflage rig with a wiry little cage fighter velcroed inside. If you actually tried to lay a hand on that gun, that skinny bitch'd come busting out of her exo-suit and lay some Krav Maga on your ass like Jennifer Lopez in "Enough."
Subject: the caption is song by eletric six Date: Feb 05 2008 11:01:05 PM Author: pompoonette
Randy's hot tonight! Can you quote songs in the captions? I dunno.
Subject: Naaw Date: Feb 05 2008 01:33:10 PM Author: Joey
I actually really liked this caption.. what a douche, what a great douche. can't beat this dudes/womans style. you know ur a screwup when not only you fall a sleep at a playground with ur gun hanging out there, but he/she prob has like ten youngsters at home playing around with that thing when he/she takes a little snooze infront of the TV every night..
god bless america and god bless the idiots of this world.
just wouldn't be the same without em..
Subject: d Date: Feb 05 2008 04:59:19 AM Author: bahh
all the comments have stopped being funny, oi, readers pull your finger out and write things other than bitchy little comments about how the caption writing has gone downhill.
there are clearly 1001 funny things that could be said about this picture.
say some of them.
Subject: deadworms Date: Feb 04 2008 05:06:47 PM Author: hey
fuck off and get a life ryan
Subject: vice Date: Feb 04 2008 03:04:52 PM Author: Ryan
i dont even know why i waste my time anymore but i please fire this writer. put a bullet in our face or get another job
Subject: yeah falling a sleep Date: Feb 04 2008 11:35:18 AM Author: strawberry george
in a childrens playground with a loaded pistol in America is a really good idea yeah.
eat cock vice
Subject: be nice... Date: Feb 03 2008 11:21:53 PM Author: n
...it was probably the poor woman's third shift that day.
Subject: wow Date: Feb 02 2008 11:34:50 PM Author: lissy
yea thats always a smart thing to do.
Subject: period Date: Feb 02 2008 11:24:39 PM Author: pickarso
what a nice blueness this picture has.
Subject: gun ain't real Date: Feb 02 2008 03:06:41 PM Author: esteban
that gun looks faker than the one Ernest made out of soap when he went to Jail. It looks like it shoots paperclips.
Subject: asd Date: Feb 02 2008 11:04:43 AM Author: asd
Getting better - too many words though.
Subject: boom! Date: Feb 02 2008 03:04:45 AM Author: fuggit
haaaahaa fuck yeah!
Subject: me Date: Feb 01 2008 08:05:18 PM Author: likes!
Good job vice...
Thumbs up bitches, your getting there.
Subject: . Date: Feb 01 2008 07:14:11 PM Author: .
HAHAHAHA
Subject: 000 Date: Feb 01 2008 06:09:56 PM Author: 000
Thanks Police Academy Movies!
Subject: 2 good ones in a week!! Date: Feb 01 2008 03:51:57 PM Author: NO WAY!
this one + captain garbage = <3
Subject: + Date: Feb 01 2008 03:13:31 PM Author: -
Good work, fake Gavin! You just might turn this thing around...
Subject: Uh..... Date: Feb 01 2008 01:53:54 PM Author: T.A.C.
Affirmative Action WORKS!
Subject: Pistol Mama Date: Feb 01 2008 11:34:43 AM Author: McInnes
This is a great caption.!!!!!
Keep it up guys!!!!
Subject: etc Date: Feb 01 2008 10:32:11 AM Author: creampufflantern
What a sharp caption. Makes me laugh.
Subject: moss balls Date: Feb 01 2008 09:08:19 AM Author: Bobby Abreu
Homeless people -- get gear like hers and you too can live your dream of getting paid for sleeping on a bench.
Sorry I forgot homeless people can't use the internet.
Subject: quality Date: Feb 01 2008 07:55:15 AM Author: Örjan
Vice is getting better! This and the previous Do were funny.
Subject: maybe Date: Feb 01 2008 07:05:49 AM Author: lol@u
he may be pathetic, a nazi, whatever, but there is one thing he does have. SOME NEW FUCKIN DOS AND DON'TS!
Subject: .. Date: Feb 01 2008 06:05:05 AM Author: lucas
haha this was funny!
Subject: So Pathetic Date: Feb 01 2008 05:58:03 AM Author: McInnes
Guy gets fired for being a egotistical White Power nazi piece of shit and now he spends his days posting on his old company's comments board promoting his pathetic new site. wow. Isn't he 40?
Subject: this Date: Feb 01 2008 01:09:18 AM Author: bob
is so old!
Subject: Do? Date: Feb 01 2008 12:19:18 AM Author: Ceeb
This is possibly the weakest do ever.
The caption isn't nearly as funny as it could be.
Try harder or fire yourselves.
When you see a dad that has no shame about his hemorrhoid pillow you know he farts at home relentlessly. They basically live their entire relationship in his bowels.
