hi fructose


is some dink from wherever that hasn't filled out his/her profile


COMMENTS BY HI FRUCTOSE

On 2009-11-06 09:48:08, hi fructose, commented on this article:
he looks like a hesitant lifeguard.
On 2009-11-06 09:44:31, hi fructose, commented on this article:
damn, kern. damn... this is a good un.
On 2009-10-20 15:58:29, hi fructose, commented on this article:
what kind of anti-aging cream are you on, mr. mcginley?
On 2009-10-20 15:57:39, hi fructose, commented on this article:
damn, how old is harmony korine in this photo? he looks like he’s cutting fourth grade.
On 2009-10-15 12:56:57, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i’m thankful we as a human race have gotten over fabric textures like velour and whatever they are wearing.
On 2009-10-12 09:23:26, hi fructose, commented on this article:
no doubt this was at the height of child’s playmania.
On 2009-10-09 09:39:23, hi fructose, commented on this article:
here’s to matador for still releasing kickass records in 2009.
On 2009-10-09 09:38:16, hi fructose, commented on this article:
patchwork nightmares on the left. so glad we left that in the past.
On 2009-10-08 10:36:49, hi fructose, commented on this article:
spiked bracelet on the outside of the parka sleeve. that’s hard.
On 2009-10-06 15:58:11, hi fructose, commented on this article:
jesus... this is a novella. worth it though. great read. i shouldn’t have been surprised. it’s mcpheeters, after all.
On 2009-10-06 15:57:22, hi fructose, commented on this article:
don’t laugh, blue. that wouldn’t even keep you afloat. then again, those paul bunyan legs of yours might be good for treading water. you do sort of have a female water polo look about you.
On 2009-09-21 17:04:42, hi fructose, commented on this article:
anti-boners ^1000
On 2009-09-21 14:53:11, hi fructose, commented on this article:
damn you, nick gazin! it should have been me doing this interview!
On 2009-09-21 14:48:38, hi fructose, commented on this article:
unless i’m wrong (which is entirely possible) a lot of english directors have had difficulty with uk censors. i know kubrick couldn’t screen ’clockwork’ in england for decades. it’s weird to think that so much more is shown on television there but they take offense with violence in their films.
On 2009-09-21 14:46:12, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i think it might as well be impossible to try and top bronson from the first death wish.
On 2009-09-21 14:44:55, hi fructose, commented on this article:
wait, gary oldman is english???
On 2009-09-21 07:19:00, hi fructose, commented on this article:
the zip collar is a nice touch. i hope his shoes are velcro too. if you’re going lazy on one kind of fastener, it’s best to go that way on them all.
On 2009-09-21 07:17:22, hi fructose, commented on this article:
outdoor theaters with seats? i have never been to one like that. pretty awesome though. i miss drive ins.
On 2009-09-03 09:57:34, hi fructose, commented on this article:
"I won’t lie. This article made me laugh, but really man it’s not cool to bash all female skaters like that. Not all of us suck or as you put it stick our asses out before doing a trick. This double standard bullshit needs to stop. These lame expectations people have for women shouldn’t fall into skating. It’s about individual in every sense. Be it skating, dressing, music, it’s all up to you. How feminine or butch some female skater is fucking trivial and a waste of time. Marisa rips and that’s all that matters. End of story."

fair enough. i think anyone that has read nieratko before will know he’s pulling everyone’s chain but for someone not familiar with his shit you could read it that way.

by the way, this doesn’t mean i want anything to change about the way he writes, thinks, laughs, or shits all over people. not that he would.
On 2009-09-02 13:15:23, hi fructose, commented on this article:
table for two, please!
On 2009-09-02 13:15:00, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i had the same nike jacket but in different colors and never worn with the rest of the awfulness on his body. oh yeah, i’m not a ginger either.
On 2009-09-02 13:13:36, hi fructose, commented on this article:
she looks like she should be playing keytar for the rock-afire explosion.
On 2009-09-02 13:12:47, hi fructose, commented on this article:
haha i love gays like this from a distance. up close they’re kind of scary.
On 2009-09-02 13:11:47, hi fructose, commented on this article:
does time travel affect the ability to rock my fucking brains out? because i’m all about the one on the right.
On 2009-09-02 13:08:50, hi fructose, commented on this article:
what is she holding onto, his armpit hair?
On 2009-09-02 13:08:01, hi fructose, commented on this article:
hello, dream uncle.
On 2009-09-02 13:07:30, hi fructose, commented on this article:
they’re just vents. vents are better than sweaty hooker ass. when the sweat runs down into their legs crevices things get really funky down there.
On 2009-08-28 14:08:35, hi fructose, commented on this article:
perfect perfect perfect. okay, maybe not the bangs, but i can deal with a busted mane when the tail is so nice.
On 2009-08-28 12:32:37, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i don’t think there are any studies to see how many rastas were into the religion before they started smoking pot because there are none. it’s made up to smoke weed and feel good about it.

one good thing about it is we don’t have to worry about them taking over anything.
On 2009-08-24 15:49:50, hi fructose, commented on this article:
bare minimal is more than enough for me.
On 2009-08-24 15:45:47, hi fructose, commented on this article:
"Are fat white chicks with shitty 4-door cars the mule or the 40 acres? "

okay that made me laugh but 2-door cars are trashier than 4-door. you need to change that up.
On 2009-08-24 15:43:57, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i so wish i could get a johnny ryan portrait done.
On 2009-08-24 15:42:47, hi fructose, commented on this article:
"if these clothes were on a white person they would be a don’t. they’re dumb"

you just don’t get it do you?
On 2009-08-24 15:42:08, hi fructose, commented on this article:
phoenix is about 50 pounds more and three trillion brain cells less.
On 2009-08-24 15:40:42, hi fructose, commented on this article:
this just screams "mom’s out shopping, we have two hours to ourselves!!" to me.
On 2009-08-24 15:40:07, hi fructose, commented on this article:
yes, you are. i’d enjoy it long enough to snap a few pics then i’d be hightailing it back to the nearest coffee shop. no, scratch that, i’d go to the coffeeshop on the other side of vondelpark where the locals get their shit. no bulldog pussification.
On 2009-08-24 15:37:59, hi fructose, commented on this article:
good to know you can now rave drunk. alcohol was frowned upon back in the day.
On 2009-08-24 15:36:22, hi fructose, commented on this article:
buzzkill personified.
On 2009-08-24 15:35:31, hi fructose, commented on this article:
what are all the people watching for and why did he remove his right glove?
On 2009-08-24 15:34:08, hi fructose, commented on this article:
everything about him looks broken. i bet even his mom would admit he’s horrendous looking.
On 2009-08-24 15:33:26, hi fructose, commented on this article:
how do you fuck a girl talk? you mean the girl’s board game?
On 2009-08-24 15:32:47, hi fructose, commented on this article:
while i agree with you, you did use the term "wisco" and thereafter you lost any speck of relevancy.
On 2009-08-24 15:31:52, hi fructose, commented on this article:
shot glass in his hand?
On 2009-08-24 15:30:56, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i think he decided he was the only one playing strip poker.
On 2009-08-24 15:29:07, hi fructose, commented on this article:
"Sick popped collar in #3"

that’s to protect his mullet locks. the ends get sensitive in the heat.
On 2009-08-24 15:28:19, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i’d like to lay her down in that autopsy table of a sink.
On 2009-08-24 15:27:42, hi fructose, commented on this article:
"artistic merit is neccesary because? "

it’s not but kern has it so the guy that said that is wrong on both counts.
On 2009-08-24 14:37:05, hi fructose, commented on this article:
ian, i was really liking what you had to say until you brought the h-word. then you lost all credibility.
On 2009-08-24 14:34:55, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i would have liked to have seen the girl’s ass after being in the hammock for an hour. waffle butt is the best.
On 2009-08-24 14:33:56, hi fructose, commented on this article:
her and i could make magic that would make david blaine blush.
On 2009-08-24 14:27:25, hi fructose, commented on this article:
yeah we get it guys, you all like to drink and you all think your nationality could outdrink the rest. is that really something to brag about? and who gives a shit? sometimes i wish my tolerance was lower so i didn’t have to spend so much when i go out.
On 2009-08-24 14:25:42, hi fructose, commented on this article:
this made me feel anti-high. let’s get fucked up again next month. whaddya say?
On 2009-08-24 14:25:04, hi fructose, commented on this article:
see mothers? sometimes playing with your food is a good thing.
On 2009-08-24 14:24:27, hi fructose, commented on this article:
don’t you know god loves all mice equally?
On 2009-08-24 14:20:47, hi fructose, commented on this article:
looks like when you put a bean in water in first grade and it sprouts.
On 2009-08-20 15:30:00, hi fructose, commented on this article:
hey if you’re going to have urine, better it be cold. the hot really brings out the smell.
On 2009-08-20 15:28:58, hi fructose, commented on this article:
"Eh, motorcycles are generally just dick replacers. It may be warm, but it’s small."

you might be correct. check out how tiny his feet are.
On 2009-08-20 15:28:09, hi fructose, commented on this article:
oooooooh the purse necklace. me like.
On 2009-08-20 15:27:36, hi fructose, commented on this article:
flames have always been a part of rockabilly. the worst part.
On 2009-08-20 15:26:34, hi fructose, commented on this article:
is it weird that the worst part for me is her headband? i cannot stand those.
On 2009-08-20 15:25:46, hi fructose, commented on this article:
what’s pretentious about having a smoke break?
On 2009-08-20 15:21:44, hi fructose, commented on this article:
hey. someone has to support the street vendors.
On 2009-08-20 15:20:55, hi fructose, commented on this article:
she’s almost too cute to be human. maybe she’s not. her outfit looks martian.
On 2009-08-20 14:41:43, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i just want to know where the hell you took this guy. looks like a crazy spot.
On 2009-08-20 12:56:54, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i’ve known only one half-egyptian girl in my time and she too was bonerific. i think there’s something about the mystical shit in their heritage that makes me like them even more. never got to discover her hidden chambers though, dammit.
On 2009-08-20 12:55:32, hi fructose, commented on this article:
pretty sure those are handles of table wine. you stay classy, chris.
On 2009-08-20 12:20:45, hi fructose, commented on this article:
even more than the high-waisted skirt i like the silk top that tie like this. there was another do where a girl was wearing a yellow one that was similar and she’s always been one of my favs.
On 2009-08-17 12:51:20, hi fructose, commented on this article:
maybe the shovel is there to protect the machete.
On 2009-08-17 12:50:42, hi fructose, commented on this article:
he looks like the kind of dude that would have such a gravelly and wise-sounding voice that you would believe anything he said, no matter how far-fetched or impossible.
On 2009-08-17 12:49:43, hi fructose, commented on this article:
finally! a backpack that doubles as a tent.
On 2009-08-10 12:05:12, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i don’t know what they are doing to that cupcake but there are flashes of light coming from it.
On 2009-08-06 12:12:52, hi fructose, commented on this article:
but when do you ever plan on taking a shit? i’ll hold em in for days if i have to.
On 2009-08-06 11:38:09, hi fructose, commented on this article:
never been to venice lately? think about that.
On 2009-08-06 11:24:18, hi fructose, commented on this article:
that makes it better. he probably didn’t see what he shot until two days later when the models were halfway around the world. it took more know-how to make sure you got things right the first time.
On 2009-08-06 11:23:33, hi fructose, commented on this article:
"his picture are amazing especially considering the fact that they didnt have didgital cameras and photshop at that time..."

oh yes, the days of in-camera photography. no instant gratification back in the day.
On 2009-08-06 10:14:47, hi fructose, commented on this article:
did she just glue sequins on a thermal? if so, score one for the home team. and the ass definitely would make any man reconsider any qualms with a stupid jacket.
On 2009-07-28 16:04:26, hi fructose, commented on this article:
never seen such an army of pretty boys. it must have taken them hours to get ready even though they are barely wearing clothes.
On 2009-07-28 16:03:08, hi fructose, commented on this article:
almost looks like a triple tit in the first one. total recall style.
On 2009-07-28 15:53:00, hi fructose, commented on this article:
my buddy
my buddy
my buddy and me
On 2009-07-28 15:47:16, hi fructose, commented on this article:
susan is stunning and there’s a part of me that’s amazed the planter hooks held her.
On 2009-07-28 15:15:08, hi fructose, commented on this article:
if fish get lonely then being a beta would really blow.
On 2009-07-28 15:14:08, hi fructose, commented on this article:
so they do wash occasionally!
On 2009-07-28 14:55:48, hi fructose, commented on this article:
gross i think i see his mantyline.
On 2009-07-28 14:50:52, hi fructose, commented on this article:
19 is old enough across the atlantic.
On 2009-07-27 14:57:47, hi fructose, commented on this article:
wonder what it takes for him to blow his whistle.
On 2009-07-27 14:55:25, hi fructose, commented on this article:
stilts on a transvestite? awesome!
On 2009-07-24 14:48:56, hi fructose, commented on this article:
for me technology will really have come to full advancement when we can build a robot that can dance like an awkward white girl.
On 2009-07-10 17:53:58, hi fructose, commented on this article:
that’s not fashion, that’s a narrow escape from a doberman attack.
On 2009-07-10 17:21:13, hi fructose, commented on this article:
well fuck i don’t have a single solitary complaint here. carry on, high priestess.
On 2009-07-10 17:19:49, hi fructose, commented on this article:
this is what it would be like if they had modern drugs in the great gatsby
On 2009-07-10 17:18:52, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i bet he can pirouette like a motherfucker on that thing
On 2009-07-10 17:17:57, hi fructose, commented on this article:
that’s a good way to hide blemishes kind of like the mesh armies use to cover large artillery.
On 2009-07-10 17:17:15, hi fructose, commented on this article:
along with a great wardrobe and sex that will leave your dick crying she also brings to the table a collection of 90s r&b so bad that you’ll need a therapist or a good painkiller hook up to make it out alive.
On 2009-07-10 17:15:26, hi fructose, commented on this article:
how did he get the glare on paperclip glasses? amazing!
On 2009-07-10 17:14:39, hi fructose, commented on this article:
if your girl is the white chick in jeans then thanks, but i’ll just stick with a twosome and a finger in my ass when i’m about to pop.
On 2009-07-10 17:13:37, hi fructose, commented on this article:
you know what? fuck this guy. he made you give him a dollar after this didn’t he?
On 2009-07-10 17:12:30, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i didn’t know assfloss went horizontal too
On 2009-07-10 17:11:39, hi fructose, commented on this article:
there she is ladies and gentlemen, the wish-you-were-home(coming) queen.
On 2009-07-10 14:16:56, hi fructose, commented on this article:
don’t tell any of these fucks has never fucked a girl in the ass. there’s not much difference in that and being a top.
On 2009-07-10 14:14:31, hi fructose, commented on this article:
all hate crimes should be hot pink. hot, pink, and sprinklings of creepy mustaches.
On 2009-07-10 14:05:39, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i looked at the spread before reading of course and was thinking girls didn’t wear bikinis that long ago. the way the photographs look i thought they were from the early 1900s. these are insane.
On 2009-06-18 08:02:09, hi fructose, commented on this article:
how many votes does it take to amend? surely all the other guys could band together.
On 2009-06-17 12:02:27, hi fructose, commented on this article:
the best johnny ryan caption yet. dude has a massive foot vein too.
On 2009-06-17 11:49:35, hi fructose, commented on this article:
it would be incredible if they pass the ass-sewing down like how we learn to replace buttons in home economics.
On 2009-06-12 14:35:00, hi fructose, commented on this article:
missiles are always in the hands of people not sane enough to use them responsibly. his don’t even work!
On 2009-06-12 14:11:42, hi fructose, commented on this article:
if it’s any consolation his back is going to be so stiff his walk home will look like a parkinson’s patient with a limp.
On 2009-06-12 13:58:16, hi fructose, commented on this article:
@greeksalot

yes we can
On 2009-06-12 13:25:02, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i wouldn’t sweat the shpiel. he’s obviously stuck in some shithole like kansas city and has city envy. notice how he feels the need to add "but i do like his poetry and art." then what is his problem with him? nothing, other than the fact that rene is in nyc and he isn’t.
On 2009-06-12 13:21:37, hi fructose, commented on this article:
oh man i really miss reading rainbow
On 2009-06-12 13:19:41, hi fructose, commented on this article:
look at the one on the left! it’s sticking out a full inch!
On 2009-06-12 13:18:02, hi fructose, commented on this article:
wait. this is dr. claw? i’m disappointed.
On 2009-06-12 13:17:06, hi fructose, commented on this article:
eyes like his get songs written about them
On 2009-06-12 13:15:20, hi fructose, commented on this article:
would it matter? look at the rest of her. a knob would be a novelty which could only help her cause. it looks like someone put a spell on her for god’s sake.
On 2009-05-27 08:10:01, hi fructose, commented on this article:
gotta give it up to him for dealing with the long nails for so long. i don’t see how you could get anything done. the lady that was in the guiness book of world records forever with the longest fingernails couldn’t use that hand at all. what’s the point? she wasn’t even scaring anyone other than her loved ones.
On 2009-05-27 08:02:09, hi fructose, commented on this article:
you’d be pretty beat down too if you just ran 8 marathons and won them all so fast the tape stuck to your waist.
On 2009-05-13 15:48:31, hi fructose, commented on this article:
aunt jemima got fun-KAYYYY!
On 2009-05-11 12:27:01, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i really hope they don’t say "queso" in mexico instead of "cheese".
On 2009-05-05 17:58:23, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i have no earthly idea what is going on here but i like it
On 2009-05-05 17:46:46, hi fructose, commented on this article:
if this is some weird heiroglyph for "chemo" then it’s such a do
On 2009-05-05 17:38:33, hi fructose, commented on this article:
if the guys are supposed to be "tune in tokyo" then i declare them best halloween costumes of all time.
On 2009-05-05 16:58:38, hi fructose, commented on this article:
that guy’s neck looks like one of those colorblindness tests
On 2009-04-30 17:09:28, hi fructose, commented on this article:
he’s ready for the physical challenge, marc.
On 2009-04-30 17:06:03, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i think my kickball team could totally kick their ass in kickball and blowing shit up
On 2009-04-20 15:21:33, hi fructose, commented on this article:
this is like in the nature videos when the hippo goes in for the kill on all the young calves. he can’t have anyone trying to overtake the herd, even if she is blonde.
On 2009-04-17 12:13:02, hi fructose, commented on this article:
this isn’t what granny panties are supposed to look like
On 2009-04-16 10:56:46, hi fructose, commented on this article:
is that dude fucking a hole in the mattress? that’s wrong. what happens the next time you jump on the bed? does jizz dust shoot out the hole?
On 2009-04-13 12:46:47, hi fructose, commented on this article:
he must shit like 20 times a day. i hope some of the pills are to take care of his colon.
On 2009-04-10 14:26:41, hi fructose, commented on this article:
it he would grow a moustache, x the glasses, get a real haircut, lose 40 pounds, get rid of his entire wardrobe, and re wire his brain, he might be an okay dude.
On 2009-04-10 14:09:44, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i think he’s checking for the earth’s heartbeat
On 2009-04-09 13:26:31, hi fructose, commented on this article:
it looks like he has down syndrome pac man around his neck
On 2009-04-08 18:24:40, hi fructose, commented on this article:
the shot of the pbr mid air is so awesome!
On 2009-04-08 17:04:13, hi fructose, commented on this article:
i bet this dude’s pubes look like a lion’s mane with black people hair
On 2009-04-08 13:32:19, hi fructose, commented on this article:
how about things to avoid at all costs:

the interstates between the hours of 4 and 7 pm
lenox mall (unless you want to see celebs, then knock yourself out)
buckhead as a whole
piedmont park on a nice day
bankhead alone at night unless you look like a thug