halzer


is some dink from wherever that hasn't filled out his/her profile


COMMENTS BY HALZER

On 2009-11-16 13:09:51, halzer, commented on this article:
this is the best thing i have ever seen.
On 2009-11-16 09:36:56, halzer, commented on this article:
he looks like the gay eddie valient to his/her rather lacking jessica rabbit
On 2009-11-16 09:25:51, halzer, commented on this article:
if he says he still rules and they aren’t doing anything to stop him then it sounds like he’s still running the show to me.
On 2009-11-13 13:06:06, halzer, commented on this article:
look at that aim. right through the slits!
On 2009-11-09 09:16:44, halzer, commented on this article:
that’s the longest bag strap these eyes have ever seen.
On 2009-11-05 09:59:27, halzer, commented on this article:
if you know enough about TR to say he’s shit they you know you’re not going to like him, so fuck off.
On 2009-11-05 09:58:44, halzer, commented on this article:
this dog is hoth-ready.
On 2009-10-23 12:23:53, halzer, commented on this article:
my adam’s apple is shivering thinking of that pain.
On 2009-10-22 15:57:56, halzer, commented on this article:
shellac is one of the best bands of this year too!
On 2009-10-22 15:56:40, halzer, commented on this article:
seriously, guys? are you that fucking dumb?
On 2009-10-22 15:55:49, halzer, commented on this article:
nice there you got there, buddy. did you stop to consider that oklahoma might not need the country’s largest trauma center since its citizens are putting bullets in each others skulls on an hourly basis?
On 2009-10-22 15:53:02, halzer, commented on this article:
i gave up on sneaking out of the house when i realized that you get out there and if you don’t have any pot or beer i’d rather be sleeping.
On 2009-10-22 15:50:25, halzer, commented on this article:
does no. 1 always look drugged?
On 2009-10-22 15:48:59, halzer, commented on this article:
penis confusion
On 2009-10-22 15:48:16, halzer, commented on this article:
what about "box of elder cunts?"
On 2009-10-22 15:47:51, halzer, commented on this article:
definitely look like him. not convinced though.
On 2009-10-22 15:46:46, halzer, commented on this article:
the little girls sitting indian style has ghost feet.
On 2009-10-22 15:46:14, halzer, commented on this article:
and for her first trick of the evening, she can make my cock magically disappear.
On 2009-10-22 12:18:05, halzer, commented on this article:
i wish i could never have learned the double meaning for pearl necklace because when i see a real pearl necklace on a lady like this it makes me sick.
On 2009-10-22 11:16:57, halzer, commented on this article:
holy shit! gingers should avoid bangs at all cost. please! for the love of my eyes.
On 2009-09-11 17:08:57, halzer, commented on this article:
strawberry fields seem way more peaceful than bushwick sidewalk.
On 2009-09-04 12:22:33, halzer, commented on this article:
eh, fuck it. she’s obviously a black chick into white guys. this goes along with the territory.
On 2009-08-26 15:19:24, halzer, commented on this article:
masaki is a pussy. still, i wouldn’t want to drink with him. i’d want to drink with milene and alyssa.
On 2009-08-26 15:18:32, halzer, commented on this article:
i like hamilton being a guinea pig since i feel like if his body can take it, mine can without a hitch.
On 2009-08-26 15:17:17, halzer, commented on this article:
looks like someone that switched from male to female and back again about 50 times too many but somehow still managed to look like someone i’d want to hang out with.
On 2009-08-26 15:15:12, halzer, commented on this article:
what the fuck is going on with that lady’s hip? looks like she’s got half a football attached.
On 2009-08-26 15:14:24, halzer, commented on this article:
if i was really drunk and mirrors were involved i think i’d get confused.
On 2009-08-26 15:13:48, halzer, commented on this article:
hey shit-for-brains, this is really about chris. everything he writes is and that’s why i love him. if you’re a marisa fan this wasn’t for you anyway. fuck off.
On 2009-08-26 15:10:58, halzer, commented on this article:
if you fingered this girl for a month she would be worn away.
On 2009-08-26 15:09:51, halzer, commented on this article:
this is the kind of kid i would want to have walk into my classroom on day one if i was in one of those movies where i’m a normal, upstanding white guy assigned to teach a class in an inner-city middle school and i’m supposed to tame them into wanting to do their long division homework.
On 2009-08-26 15:08:28, halzer, commented on this article:
vanessa hudgens? is that you?
On 2009-08-26 15:08:00, halzer, commented on this article:
that’s what my dog looks like when she hears a doorbell on television.
On 2009-08-26 15:07:13, halzer, commented on this article:
it’s bubs working undercover as a white meth head.
On 2009-08-26 15:06:28, halzer, commented on this article:
was minnie mouse a midget?
On 2009-08-26 15:05:14, halzer, commented on this article:
dude on the right just looks like fun times.
On 2009-08-26 15:04:23, halzer, commented on this article:
barefoot in the city! you’re right. only see this when the robe-wearing black church-goers walk around the neighborhood.
On 2009-08-26 15:02:54, halzer, commented on this article:
it’s going to be simply impossible to dress up for 2000s nights. there are unlimited looks. now that i think about it, that’s a good thing. way to go, us!
On 2009-08-26 15:01:27, halzer, commented on this article:
did someone pose her like that during rigor mortis?
On 2009-08-26 15:00:57, halzer, commented on this article:
wonder how long it took their cigarettes to burn all the way down to the filter.
On 2009-08-26 14:59:00, halzer, commented on this article:
"he’s got his whole life ahead of him"

that’s the scary part. this is as good as he’s going to be. ever. it’s all downhill and teenage pregnancy from here.
On 2009-08-26 14:58:11, halzer, commented on this article:
hot but i’d make her make that face all day everyday. if i saw her smile she’d get a backhanded slap across the face so fast she’d be seeing tweety birds circling that bow.
On 2009-08-26 14:56:13, halzer, commented on this article:
a tragic pube shaving incident
On 2009-08-26 14:55:25, halzer, commented on this article:
the irish hammered head shark.
On 2009-08-26 14:40:53, halzer, commented on this article:
look at that square jaw on washington. wait, or is that a tumor? eeeeeesh.
On 2009-08-18 12:03:15, halzer, commented on this article:
depends if this was before or after they shut down the smart shops. seeing this mid-day on a stomach full of mushrooms might actually be the highlight of the trip (no pun intended).
On 2009-08-12 13:53:57, halzer, commented on this article:
what’s that shit on johnny’s forehead?
On 2009-08-12 13:53:03, halzer, commented on this article:
eh. "l’d" has a flaw though. it only saves you one letter. "f’d" saves you u, c, k, and e.
On 2009-08-12 13:42:40, halzer, commented on this article:
hmm. i see two mice. which is god’s fave?
On 2009-08-12 13:42:05, halzer, commented on this article:
if their reproductive organs are right nex to their faces does this mean they could suck their own dick? that’s what i want to know.
On 2009-08-05 16:42:44, halzer, commented on this article:
hahaha his chin is so fat it looks like his beard isn’t on right.
On 2009-08-05 16:41:35, halzer, commented on this article:
eeeesh. it’s the "i’m going to sag my pants to a level where my ass appears non-existant".
On 2009-08-05 16:40:02, halzer, commented on this article:
oh emo fuckers, how you make me laugh. i’m sure he has every cassette single of jared leto’s band too.
On 2009-08-05 16:38:55, halzer, commented on this article:
something about this makes me want to do a bump. palmtrees seem to have that effect on me.
On 2009-08-05 16:36:57, halzer, commented on this article:
at least they’re getting gradually better???
On 2009-08-05 16:35:13, halzer, commented on this article:
he does sort of have the mona lisa lips.
On 2009-08-05 16:34:00, halzer, commented on this article:
she looks like an upright pregnant bulldog
On 2009-08-05 16:31:42, halzer, commented on this article:
this is one of those ladies you have to call "darlin’"
On 2009-08-05 16:31:03, halzer, commented on this article:
nice! i’m listening to primary colours right now.
On 2009-08-05 16:30:02, halzer, commented on this article:
there’s definitely a point where you become too old to be in the crowd at a show. it’s either backstage or on stage. think about it. if robert pollard was just some dude you saw at all the local shows he wouldn’t be so cool then would he?
On 2009-08-05 16:28:52, halzer, commented on this article:
ahhhhh fart limbos are the best kind of limbos.
On 2009-08-05 16:28:16, halzer, commented on this article:
he looks like the rich asshole dude in a movie that you know is going to get his comeuppence at the end of the flick.
On 2009-08-05 16:27:14, halzer, commented on this article:
but they are pretty awesome for the group of people that are too lazy to walk.
On 2009-08-05 16:26:32, halzer, commented on this article:
just think, in only five years he will have moved on to wheatpasting.
On 2009-08-05 16:25:53, halzer, commented on this article:
the tattoo artist must have had a blast going around the massive mole on his temple.
On 2009-08-05 16:24:55, halzer, commented on this article:
okay, we get it. you consider yourself a painter. now get back to you studio and never leave again.
On 2009-08-05 16:24:03, halzer, commented on this article:
i seriously can’t believe people will pay 500 dollars for shoes like this.
On 2009-08-05 16:23:13, halzer, commented on this article:
hippies in the city are wondrous creatures.
On 2009-08-05 16:22:04, halzer, commented on this article:
every guy i’ve ever seen wearing one of these hats has been a total dickcheese except for payne stewart, rip.
On 2009-07-28 14:12:39, halzer, commented on this article:
never heard of the point and shoot aesthetic? where have you been hiding?
On 2009-07-28 14:11:56, halzer, commented on this article:
i love it when people complain about something being good but having been done before. i guess because the beatles wrote good pop songs no one else is allowed to. there’s room for originality but there’s nothing wrong with more of a good thing.
On 2009-07-28 12:53:30, halzer, commented on this article:
i want her backpack. tropical aquarium camo.
On 2009-07-27 14:48:20, halzer, commented on this article:
in that line of thinking, it could be a mix of werewolf, paula abdul, and the skat kat from the opposites attract video.
On 2009-07-23 09:25:22, halzer, commented on this article:
i’m under the impression that your shoes should never be whiter than your shirt. it’s like when you get new shoelaces on old shoes. it doesn’t look right.
On 2009-07-20 15:26:21, halzer, commented on this article:
perverted? nah. really good? yes.

the ginger ale finger is hands down my favorite. they all look like different photographers.
On 2009-07-20 14:23:22, halzer, commented on this article:
makes me want to go on a road trip. forever.
On 2009-07-17 13:52:15, halzer, commented on this article:
no. 11 looks like asher levine from the spandex shoot.
On 2009-07-17 13:45:21, halzer, commented on this article:
i love the photographs and like the frames but put together it might be too much. think i’d like them better without the cardboard.
On 2009-07-14 09:32:42, halzer, commented on this article:
pigpen is fairly common nickname. the keyboard player from the grateful dead is just the most famous of them.
On 2009-07-06 09:23:03, halzer, commented on this article:
could creep up on someone. sneakers make sense because you can be sneaky. i’m going to stick with calling them pilgrim shoes.
On 2009-07-02 12:36:02, halzer, commented on this article:
i liked epcot when i went. does that make me a dork? spaceship earth is a spaceship! in a pointy sphere!
On 2009-07-01 14:21:34, halzer, commented on this article:
hey as long as this was taken before the first of september i say fucking go for it.
On 2009-07-01 14:19:10, halzer, commented on this article:
let it go, man. the skin cancer is in so deep in has underskin storm shelters on you.
On 2009-06-10 13:55:32, halzer, commented on this article:
is it weird that the first thing i thought was "is that a toupee?"
On 2009-06-10 13:38:01, halzer, commented on this article:
he looks like one of the guys you’ve known for a while and think he’s the most boring person on earth and then out of the blue he says something so funny your opinion of his is never the same.
On 2009-06-10 12:10:34, halzer, commented on this article:
that doesn’t appear to be running water from a river (it all dried up right?). so it’s probably rain water and all good for swimming and beer drinking. it could use a rope swing for added fun.
On 2009-06-09 07:44:18, halzer, commented on this article:
it looks like he is carefully lining up a paper football for an important field goal.
On 2009-05-26 13:31:20, halzer, commented on this article:
that’s no falafel you idiot. ground beef for sure.
On 2009-05-26 13:14:53, halzer, commented on this article:
a don’t that i still might possibly do but would later regret
On 2009-05-26 13:13:34, halzer, commented on this article:
mexicans will do anything because they don’t know what is taboo and what isn’t (in america, that is). one time my mexican neighbors slaughtered a goat in their front yard and were clueless when the cops showed up that they were doing anything out of the ordinary.
On 2009-05-26 13:10:09, halzer, commented on this article:
how awesome is it to have your pet parrot hanging out on a stick with you all day long? pretty awesome i think. also i’d like to thank the photographer for strategically placing male genitalia out of frame and/or focus.
On 2009-05-06 13:44:15, halzer, commented on this article:
is this guy for real? he says 1+1 don’t equal 2 and he says formulas are abstract. aren’t formulas exact? that is the reverse of abstract.
On 2009-04-28 14:33:48, halzer, commented on this article:
the harley slogan finally makes perfect sense

live to ride
ride to live

don’t mind if i do
On 2009-04-28 14:31:42, halzer, commented on this article:
i think i had that leather jacket. it sucked in 1989 too.
On 2009-04-20 09:09:15, halzer, commented on this article:
her elbow has its own ass
On 2009-04-17 12:51:26, halzer, commented on this article:
correct me if i’m wrong but didn’t boba fett have a segway-like thing that flew? how are you supposed to keep up with a flying bounty hunter on one of these? i’ll tell you - you aren’t.
On 2009-04-14 09:01:44, halzer, commented on this article:
fake tanner? where?
On 2009-04-14 09:00:40, halzer, commented on this article:
the trick is getting the cracker into the rectum and then twisting. it’s tricky. if you time it right you can shove it up really fast and as soon as his asshole clenches twist.
On 2009-04-13 12:38:14, halzer, commented on this article:
i don’t think kids should know the eating out face pose. i blame party photo sites.
On 2009-04-13 12:35:34, halzer, commented on this article:
maybe i’m wrong but i don’t think your shoulders are supposed to look like a weathered pyramid.
On 2009-04-13 12:32:53, halzer, commented on this article:
his dreads are extra poop-like
On 2009-04-03 16:34:19, halzer, commented on this article:
we’re on a 30 year oil crisis cycle and i pray the next time it’s due we’re no longer dependent on it. hulanicki can’t survive another one people!
On 2009-04-03 16:32:04, halzer, commented on this article:
i thought jericho cave was androgynous but this takes the cake. wow. i was sure it was a guy.
On 2009-04-03 16:28:02, halzer, commented on this article:
wow. maybe next time you could write us a thesis. who cares if he’s a businessman? more power to him. it’s a dog eat dog world and if i was one i’d want rick in my pack.
On 2009-04-03 16:01:12, halzer, commented on this article:
this girl is a fucking shapeshifter. i thought it was two different girls until i check the credits.
On 2009-03-10 13:10:22, halzer, commented on this article:
looks like the point break bank robbing team five years before keanu showed up. swayze’s in the back overseeing things while the other two train.
On 2009-03-09 10:54:12, halzer, commented on this article:
i call bullshit on his dick sticking straight up. it would have rolled to the side. unless rigor mortis kicks in way faster than i thought.
On 2009-03-06 15:53:21, halzer, commented on this article:
i don’t like it when girls’ boobs look like they hate each other.
On 2009-02-27 16:03:03, halzer, commented on this article:
hopefully they’re saving all the poppy plants cause lord knows the world’s gonna need lots and lots of opiates in the hangover from this war on terrorism.
On 2009-02-27 16:01:15, halzer, commented on this article:
i swear i don’t think adam sandler ages. he could throw a hat on a be billy madison right now.
On 2009-02-26 13:08:57, halzer, commented on this article:
wow, even the immigrant sweatshop worker knew this was a bad idea.
On 2009-02-23 17:04:07, halzer, commented on this article:
a cool but probably unrealizable concept would be for each artist to select a director and have all the pieces put back-to-back in mini movies.
On 2009-02-23 16:57:49, halzer, commented on this article:
"We see it like the delivery of a baby, because we are reborn as women."

that must be some gnarly afterbirth. and i guess it makes your dick stillborn? what happens to the dick?
On 2009-02-23 15:10:04, halzer, commented on this article:
"i don’t think they allow veterans to wear hoop earrings."

obviously you never saw born on the fourth of july.
On 2009-02-20 14:11:27, halzer, commented on this article:
what do you know? a fashion shoot that actually looks fun to be a part of. i can almost hear the "pyuuooooooshhhhhhhhhhhh".
On 2009-02-20 13:42:58, halzer, commented on this article:
homeless fingerpainting
On 2009-02-18 13:08:26, halzer, commented on this article:
are the bottom half of his shins shooting through the floor?
On 2009-02-17 18:56:41, halzer, commented on this article:
i was with my friend when he bought prince of persia and the first thing i noticed was the weird wall-jumping (acrobatics i guess). the second thing i noticed was how much ass he was kicking, but now i think maybe he’s a chump playing an easy game. granted, i’m no expert. my favorite game is still excitebike and i thought i was a game wizard when a friend told me about the "justin bailey" cheat for metroid.
On 2009-02-17 16:43:33, halzer, commented on this article:
does the elf hand you a prize through the little door on the bottom or is that for stool samples?
On 2009-02-17 10:08:23, halzer, commented on this article:
i never thought about it before but the "gooey film" on the keyboards really freaked me out. i wish i could go back and wash my hands after all the trips to to the computer lab. i probably ingested dead sperm on mulitple occasions.
On 2009-02-09 13:29:18, halzer, commented on this article:
there nothing quite like riding along the range on your favorite mare, with the breeze gently rustling through your new h&m blouse.
On 2009-02-06 19:35:01, halzer, commented on this article:
left tit is the merrimack. right is the monitor. bikini bottom, well, let’s call it appomattox court house. it’s where both sides came together.
On 2009-02-06 19:21:10, halzer, commented on this article:
clowns are people that either didn’t get enough love as children or got way too much love from uncle gary.
On 2009-02-06 19:17:35, halzer, commented on this article:
that left me in stitches. hopefully not the ones close to that dandruff chunk.
On 2009-02-06 19:13:35, halzer, commented on this article:
my dick hasn’t been this confused since the "oops i did it again" video came out
On 2009-02-02 12:56:16, halzer, commented on this article:
you think she’s bouyant?
On 2009-01-29 19:13:10, halzer, commented on this article:
a perfect example of why church and state should be separate!
On 2009-01-29 19:03:55, halzer, commented on this article:
re: the misfire question, he probably meant that the gun jammed, in which case, she wouldn’t have heard it. this happens sometimes, especially with individuals not used to loading guns.
On 2009-01-28 17:23:54, halzer, commented on this article:
jesus. normally i could give a shit about cops, but i don’t envy having to answer these kind of calls.
On 2009-01-28 17:22:35, halzer, commented on this article:
the drawing on this story infuriates me more than the story.